Sorry
I'm sorry. I'm sorry to my son. My little boy, the one man that will always love me no matter what. I'm sorry that he has a mother that's so mentally unstable. I'm sorry that he has a father who is so irresponsible and selfish. I'm not going to let him hurt you though. He can hurt me as much as he wants, but he's not going to hurt you. I won't let him. I'll give him the chance to be your father, but if he treats you the way he treats me, I'll move heaven and earth to make sure he never does it again. I'll protect you if I have to, I just hope I don't. I hope that I'm wrong and that he's capable of loving you, but if he's not, I'm not going to let him hurt you. I'm sorry I couldn't give you a better father. I pray to God that your father grows up and turns out to be a great father to you. If he isn't, you still have me. I know that isn't enough though. I wanted so much more for you. Growing up I would always dream of the life I would give my children. A life better than mine, a real family, but I failed you. I failed myself and my dreams were shattered. I can't change what has already happened, but I have some control over what happens now. I'm sorry for everything I can't give you. I'm sorry that I get so sad all the time. I'm sorry that you have to feel what I feel right now. I'm sorry that I've failed you so much already, but I promise that once you're here it'll all change. I won't be so sad all the time, I'll forget about everything else and be the mother you deserve.