(no subject)
I have so much frustration that I don't even know where to begin. I don't feel like I'm a part of my sorority. Yes, I know, I went inactive and blah blah but it wasn't really by choice. Of course I still talk to and see girls but none of it is the same. I don't go to chapter, I don't go to events... I feel so left out and it bites. I've barely met the Gamma class. I ran into one of them the other night and I introduced myself because I recognized her and she had this look on her face like, "why is this girl telling me who she is?" until I told her I was in AEPhi and she was like, "ohhh hii" and we actually talked after that. Everyone keeps saying, "it's only one semester" but none of them even remotely understand what I am going through. As much as I used to complain about having to go to Chapter... at least they have the option to go. They can go to whatever they want. I'm missing our first retreat and semi-formal. Retreat is next weekend and I'm going to Miami because I can't stand the thought of being here. Only bright side is Shiri can't go either so I feel a little better that I'm not the only one missing it. Everyone is so excited about it and keeps talking about it and I sort of just want to hit them. Girls are complaining about finding dates for semi-formal and I just want to be like, "AT LEAST YOU GET TO GO!" I miss my sorority more than anything. It became my life last semester and the fact that I basically have to put my life on hold for four months, makes me want to cry. Girls keep asking me where I've disappeared to. Um, yeah, I can't go to anything! Bright side, I get to watch Gamma class get initiated. I think I'd cry if I wasn't allowed to.
As for school, It's been four or five weeks and I'm yet to miss one class. That's really fucking impressive. I haven't even left a class early or gotten to one late. I've done all my assignments. I think I did good on my Humanities quiz last week. My professor decided to throw in 20 questions about the Aztecs, Incas, and Mayan's and about two about Latin American geography and the such. I had my first math test today. It was pretty easy I think. I got an 88 on my first Comp II paper. I think I did good considering I didn't get it peer edited so it was sort of like my rough draft. I have another Humanities quiz on Tuesday. I have a rough draft due in Comp II for our second critical analysis. I'm not going to College Algebra on Friday because I'm flying down to Miami at 8am.
As for the boys department. I want to shoot all of them in the balls. Why do guys from your past always pop up? Hunter broke up with Teri and suddenly wanted to hang out again until I turned him down dirty style. I never realized how dumb that kid is until the other night. Wtf did I ever see in him? Josh had the audacity to ask me if I have implants. 1) He dated me and 2) he knows I'm very anti-plastic surgery. Grasso and them, on Tuesday night, were like "you never come by" and what not. I'm like... ummm that reaction was delayed like a year. As for Randy... I barely see or talk to him. He calls me to tell me he'll call me "in a little bit" and when he says in a little bit, he means 24 hours later and then the cycle repeats. It's getting ridiculous. I'm to the point where I know I'll be spending next Tuesday alone like I pretty much do every year. My plan is to get obliterated. I have Armani. He's the one guy who will never break my heart and will love me unconditionally for the rest of his life.
I'm going to go shower and relax a bit. I need to get wasted tonight. Woo.