(no subject)
she takes a drag and wonders
why it hurts so much to breathe
she's a little shakey
and her eyes are tough to meet
you don't know what you don't take in
i never knew to miss what i never had
love me like you know me
kiss me like you can
touch me like you own me
look me in the eye
and tell me who i am
it's a drastic measure
and i'm willing to be wrong
he's a bit ungrounded
and he stood there all along
i never imagined slipping thru his hands
i decided that when i go to college i want to be an art major. me and laura were talking about it yesterday and she said i could do advertisement really well. i just like .. i dunno. i haven't really been thinking about any of this stuff in a while cause i've been caught up in so many other unimportant things. but it's almost senior year and i've always been so focused on reaching my goals and being exactly what i want to be.. and especially in this last year i have NOT done that. and i've always been really interested in art and literature. i think i just forgot about that. but i need to get back on track.
i want it to be summertime. me and laura were talking about going around downtown and taking pictures of like all the cool architecture down there and stuff. obviously, we discussed what drugs would be fun to do those days, haha. but whatever, i really really want to do that. and i wanna lay on the beach and read a book and smoke a cigarette. and wear a hat. i dunno why, but i want to be wearing a hat. i think i've refound my motivation. i dunno where the hell it's been all this time.. i think i just thrive in the summertime. i love the sunshine and the cool breeze and the clouds. yay! it's my favorite. oh, texas weather, how i've missed you!
kat let me borrow the lovely bones. i'm gonna read it after the taks tests. so far i really like it. it's a cool perspective for a book. it makes me think of stefano, watching all of us and being able to see what we're thinking and wishing he could be here to give us advice like he used to. and i like the way she describes her heaven and how some people have overlapping heavens because they have the same desires... um, yes.
i'm sooo excited for my brother coming home!! he gets back from afghanistan in july. he won't be coming HOME but at least he won't be over there anymore. and he gets out on my 18th birthday if he can save up his extra leave. that would be so great. we were talking about going on a cruise when he gets back as like a graduation thing for me. i never got to know my brother cause he left when i was like.. 12 or 13. and in the last 3 years i've definitely grown and changed a ton. i had to overcome daryn.. my sister moving in and out and out of town and back.. my mom hating me and loving me, me hating her and loving her.. my dad leaving us, trying to come back, ignoring me, criticizing me, becoming an alcoholic.. and high school just in general.
i feel better about alot of things now. and i realized that the things i love most in the world are : nature, music, art, and books.
i love how gay i am.
i gotta go do laundry and get dinner started now. i'm my mom's little bitch now. woo hoo!
<3xo
why it hurts so much to breathe
she's a little shakey
and her eyes are tough to meet
you don't know what you don't take in
i never knew to miss what i never had
love me like you know me
kiss me like you can
touch me like you own me
look me in the eye
and tell me who i am
it's a drastic measure
and i'm willing to be wrong
he's a bit ungrounded
and he stood there all along
i never imagined slipping thru his hands
i decided that when i go to college i want to be an art major. me and laura were talking about it yesterday and she said i could do advertisement really well. i just like .. i dunno. i haven't really been thinking about any of this stuff in a while cause i've been caught up in so many other unimportant things. but it's almost senior year and i've always been so focused on reaching my goals and being exactly what i want to be.. and especially in this last year i have NOT done that. and i've always been really interested in art and literature. i think i just forgot about that. but i need to get back on track.
i want it to be summertime. me and laura were talking about going around downtown and taking pictures of like all the cool architecture down there and stuff. obviously, we discussed what drugs would be fun to do those days, haha. but whatever, i really really want to do that. and i wanna lay on the beach and read a book and smoke a cigarette. and wear a hat. i dunno why, but i want to be wearing a hat. i think i've refound my motivation. i dunno where the hell it's been all this time.. i think i just thrive in the summertime. i love the sunshine and the cool breeze and the clouds. yay! it's my favorite. oh, texas weather, how i've missed you!
kat let me borrow the lovely bones. i'm gonna read it after the taks tests. so far i really like it. it's a cool perspective for a book. it makes me think of stefano, watching all of us and being able to see what we're thinking and wishing he could be here to give us advice like he used to. and i like the way she describes her heaven and how some people have overlapping heavens because they have the same desires... um, yes.
i'm sooo excited for my brother coming home!! he gets back from afghanistan in july. he won't be coming HOME but at least he won't be over there anymore. and he gets out on my 18th birthday if he can save up his extra leave. that would be so great. we were talking about going on a cruise when he gets back as like a graduation thing for me. i never got to know my brother cause he left when i was like.. 12 or 13. and in the last 3 years i've definitely grown and changed a ton. i had to overcome daryn.. my sister moving in and out and out of town and back.. my mom hating me and loving me, me hating her and loving her.. my dad leaving us, trying to come back, ignoring me, criticizing me, becoming an alcoholic.. and high school just in general.
i feel better about alot of things now. and i realized that the things i love most in the world are : nature, music, art, and books.
i love how gay i am.
i gotta go do laundry and get dinner started now. i'm my mom's little bitch now. woo hoo!
<3xo