.my shadow's the only one who walks beside me.

[pink_pillows]

i'm feeling depressed. i dont know what to do with myself and i feel like i dont measure up. i dont even know what exactly i'm trying to measure up to..but it still hurts. i feel fat and dumb and pathetic and i miss my walthams. i cant focus on studying and i'm really scared. then there is this whole thing with my dad, but i dont want to rant to the world about that so i will write another entry right after this for friends only..but anyway: i'm scared and i'm upset and i just feel like waking up tommorrow would be pointless. i know it seems like i am only doing this to make people feel bad for me but seriously i'm not. i think i just want someone to talk to about everything. but thats impossible because no one has gone to waltham and misses waltham people, and no one has gone to camp with me and feels like they dont measure up to the camp people theatre wise or looks wise, and no one goes to bbn and doesnt know how to fit in or really know who their friends are. i feel like crawling into a hole and staying there until summer. i feel really alone and abandoned right now. thats all

-amy