(no subject)
Last night I went to the movies with Mike and Stephen. And we're in the car on the way over there and who do I see drive by but fucking Will. Correct. For those who don't know Will has not called me since Wednesday night (haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa). So I'm like ok good he's not dead, and I call him and the bitch does not answer. Beautiful.
Then we get to the movies and Jordan basically informs us that we are not going to the movies we are very much going to a miscellaneous cast party. Great. Then we drive to a poor neighborhood and Stephen starts freaking out saying "Guys this is a really bad part of town." So Mike proceeds to park as far away as possible from the place where the party actually is. Then when we finally get there Mike and Stephen start panicing as to how we are going to get in, but me and Jordan quickly just start following a group of people who walk in and pretend to be part of their party.
Enough of that, here are the highlights of the evening:
1) The alcohol was in a fucking trash can that was filled to the brim.
2) Mike was fucking plastered and introduced himself to the same gay man three times.
3) Pretzels in the cooch. "Dip."
4) Stephen, Jordan, and I mastered sitting down while dancing while being danced on. "It's the new pink."
5) Stephen came two inches from performing cunnilingus on a wetback.
6) Two words: Walter Kmiec.
7) I made out with an endangered species, which means a black lesbian from FAMU.
8) THIS IS MY LITTLE BROTHER! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
9) I almost made out with a gorgeous conservative straight guy but then Moreno was very quick to cockblock!!!!
10) All the shenanigans were brought to an abrupt halt by the motherfucking popo.
Thus is college!
Then we get to the movies and Jordan basically informs us that we are not going to the movies we are very much going to a miscellaneous cast party. Great. Then we drive to a poor neighborhood and Stephen starts freaking out saying "Guys this is a really bad part of town." So Mike proceeds to park as far away as possible from the place where the party actually is. Then when we finally get there Mike and Stephen start panicing as to how we are going to get in, but me and Jordan quickly just start following a group of people who walk in and pretend to be part of their party.
Enough of that, here are the highlights of the evening:
1) The alcohol was in a fucking trash can that was filled to the brim.
2) Mike was fucking plastered and introduced himself to the same gay man three times.
3) Pretzels in the cooch. "Dip."
4) Stephen, Jordan, and I mastered sitting down while dancing while being danced on. "It's the new pink."
5) Stephen came two inches from performing cunnilingus on a wetback.
6) Two words: Walter Kmiec.
7) I made out with an endangered species, which means a black lesbian from FAMU.
8) THIS IS MY LITTLE BROTHER! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
9) I almost made out with a gorgeous conservative straight guy but then Moreno was very quick to cockblock!!!!
10) All the shenanigans were brought to an abrupt halt by the motherfucking popo.
Thus is college!