RAMBLE
Tomorrow I am going to Chicago to see John and his family. I am surrounded by change. I like change it just takes a little getting use too. Daily I learn things I like and dislike about myself. Somethings I have noticed about myself... I am way shy and alot of times that comes off in the wrong way.I wish I was good at making new friends but I'm terrible at it. I don't mean meeting people I mean making good frienships. If you are my friend I will be so loyal to you I can't stand to go to bed angry however I've had to accept that even though you might be ready to forgive it may take the other person longer..that's hard for me .I hate crying I am not saying I never do it but man I can not take it when someone else is crying I become so awkward maybe it's lack of maturity on my part. I have learned that depression is so real and I found that out in such a hard way. (not me) My sister lost her baby two days ago...I love to say that God is in control with his perfect purpose, in my heart I know that and I believe that but if it were my baby would I have faith in that? I pray that I would...I'm getting married in 5mths and I never thought I would be typing that. a wedding is a day and a marriage is a life time. I've learned that I have had walls up but I've learned that I can't have walls up with people that have never given me bricks to build those walls. II'm tired and I know no one reads LJ I needed to type....