The Person to Trust is Yourself
I try to do things, and to be the person to reach out and make the effort. In the end I feel hollow and like I've lost when no one notices.
I am happiest when I am working in set parameters and I know what is expected of me. Alone, I flail and reach in different directions looking for a secure anchor.
I realise now that I need to be my own anchor.
Since I blogged about the disability saga in work, they system change that the tech guides, has stopped working. The programme kept making the system crash so they had to remove it. The sickening feeling returned that I couldn't do my job. There was a lot less sympathy this time. Work, wanted me to remain on the phones while they looked for new technology. They said I had managed a few calls so I could keep doing it. When I fought back on this point, they threatened to fire me. I held my ground for as long as I could, staying off the phones and doing other work.
The pressure was on me, it was clear they wanted me to walk. It got more and more unbearable and I was getting advice from all over the place. But the overriding suggestion from most people was to get back on the phone and do it as slowly as I needed and let them see the problem.
My problem is, work now thing I am lying about the problem. When my wrist hurt, even friends at work made jokes about how I had hurt it. I've lost all credibility.
Now I have to shut up, and take what is given me until the new technology arrives and hope it helps. I hate work, but I am holding my head up.
I am happiest when I am working in set parameters and I know what is expected of me. Alone, I flail and reach in different directions looking for a secure anchor.
I realise now that I need to be my own anchor.
Since I blogged about the disability saga in work, they system change that the tech guides, has stopped working. The programme kept making the system crash so they had to remove it. The sickening feeling returned that I couldn't do my job. There was a lot less sympathy this time. Work, wanted me to remain on the phones while they looked for new technology. They said I had managed a few calls so I could keep doing it. When I fought back on this point, they threatened to fire me. I held my ground for as long as I could, staying off the phones and doing other work.
The pressure was on me, it was clear they wanted me to walk. It got more and more unbearable and I was getting advice from all over the place. But the overriding suggestion from most people was to get back on the phone and do it as slowly as I needed and let them see the problem.
My problem is, work now thing I am lying about the problem. When my wrist hurt, even friends at work made jokes about how I had hurt it. I've lost all credibility.
Now I have to shut up, and take what is given me until the new technology arrives and hope it helps. I hate work, but I am holding my head up.