CAS<333
As he said his final word's too me I felt the tear's build up in my eye's, I never thought in my life I would be without him. How could he just let everything we had go straight down the drain like that, was I not enough, was I not good enough, did I not love him enough what was it. He said it was because of the distance but too me distance should never stop true love. I guess he never felt the way I felt for him, the way I wanted needed had too have him. I hate this pain I feel I remember when I promised myself up&down never ever too fucken love anyone again what the hell is wrong with me why did I let myself fall so hard so deep. Am I just getting carried away maybe I am but I think this subject is something that should be drawned out. I love you I think your amazing I would kill myself for you in a heartbeat or less but what you did tonight made everything so much quicker & easier too do, I think sometimes you get scared of loving someone and actually having a long relationship I think you get scared of the fact of seeing the same face everyday or touching the same body over & over again. But sometimes in life you have too face your problems & try alittle extra harder because babe you cant go on your whole life killing other ppl. Thank god I am strong & can deal with you not being here & thank god I can handle the fact of US not being one, But I could never handle your hands on another girl or you saying I LOVE YOU too another girl besides me I deserve that not her. But really what is it all about is it really the distance doing this too you I mean us tearing you frm me...Or is it because you found someone better .....I guess I will never be able too answer that question. The thing is I have no idea right this very second why I am even writting you this or why I am doing this I wouldnt say it's a waste of time because instead of being on my bed crying my eyes out & wishing too have you here in my arm's I am cold eyed writting myself a shamless love letter. So I will leave it at this I love you more than words can express, more than you love bmx, more then words need paper, more then the words I LOVE YOU because baby you deserve more then just 3 word's But the last word's I will leave you with are 6 months too make it 14 mintue's & 33 second's too end it all....Carrington Allen Schwelbel 12/31/05-5/21/06
