Feces and FUN!
Something has been bothering me for quite some time now. Something terrible. Something filthy, dirty, and disgusting beyond measure. Literally.
That something is shitting.
Ponder a moment, it's so fucking horrid. People shit. Everyone SHITS. Think of the hottest, sexiest person you can bring to mind. Models, celebrities, your every day working class schmuck face. They all pop a sqaut on the porcelain and force large quantities of feces out of their anus hole. And the stench. Don't get me started on the stench. The more attractive the person, the more their shit reeks like dirty, rotten ass. Trust me.
Why do we do it? Human beings, given the divine quality of the abilty to reason, a gift no other animal was given, is brought down to their level. We shit just like them, and it's just as disgusting.
Poopie comes out of your bum bum. Think about it, seriously.
Look at that man. Does he look happy? No, he looks like he's crying. Inside as well as out. Not to mention he's reading something. You think he's reading for enjoyment? No, he's reading to distract himself from the horrors that are falling out of his rectum. He's a brave man, and I would hug him if he was here, and wasn't sitting on a toilet bowl with his pants down.
And now a picture of a sea cow. A sea cow BREAKDANCING!
Dance sea cow, dance your little heart out.
Back to pooping. Come on people, something needs to be done. How can we go on living this way, giving into our fecal demands every time it calls on us like a dirty little mexican maid. We are it's bitches. We are victims of instinct. We're no better than the animals themselves. We must rise up. Shitting can only lead to bad things, such as diarhea, stinky ass syndrome, and cow licks. And I don't mean the hair kind.
Now that's just offensive.
The problem is very real, and we must face it head on. We must somehow stop the evils of defacation once and for all. I'm open to suggestions on how we do it, so let the comments roll in.
And you thought you knew how fucked up I was.