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It's been a while since I indulged my creative side with pen and paper, hasn't it, my hunnies? So I wrote another masterpiece for you all to enjoy~!
This story not only will amaze you with my talent, but it should show you the way to defeat one of your worst enemies, too!
Enjoy!
One day, Rodyle was sitting alone in his lair of evil doom and crap.
“Nihihihihihi!” He laughed evilly. “I have just perfected the perfect plan! It is so evil that all will fall in my clutches! It’s perfect! Nihihihihihihi!”
“Stop right there!” a powerful and sexy voice interrupted him.
Rodyle turned and saw the face of his worst enemy-Zelos. He stood, one hand behind his head, the other on his hip. Then, with a casual flick, Zelos’ glorious vermilion locks tumbled forward in a river of curls. Rodyle watched with barely suppressed envy and hatred.
“As the sexiest man in the entire world, I cannot allow you to do such a horrible thing!” Zelos declared in a ringing voice. “I shall vanquish you in the best way I know how!”
“Nihihihihi! You shall never overcome me! Never!” Rodyle threw his head back and laughed maniacally.
Zelos fingered his chin in a manly and sexy way that did not detract at all from his prettiness. “Oh no?” He took a few strong, striding steps forward, until he was only a few feet away. “I think not. For I know your ultimate weakness!”
“No!” Rodyle gasped. “How could you? I have kept it a secret from everyone! Absolutely everyone!”
“Your ultimate weakness is” -he paused- “you are envious, for you are not sexy!”
“No!” Rodyle fell to his knees. “My ultimate weakness-exposed! How can this be?” He began to weep, crystalline tears that caused the merciful and sexy Zelos to take pity on him.
“But fear not, Rodyle. For I shall teach you the way of the sexy, should you give up your evil ways.” He posed dramatically.
Rodyle looked up at him with hope shining amidst the tears in his eyes. “You will?”
“Yes, I will,” Zelos said nobly. “Do you promise?”
“Yes! Oh, yes!” Rodyle cried out.
“Then rise, Rodyle.” Zelos ran his fingers through his luxurious locks.
Rodyle did so, never taking his grateful eyes off his previous nemesis. Zelos slowly walked around him, deep in thought. Then, he spoke.
“The coat,” he pronounced with the utmost gravity, “must go.”
“But I’ve worn this style of coat for three hundred years!” Rodyle protested.
“And it does absolutely nothing for your figure. Honestly, hunny, we need to see that body! Work it!” Zelos advised him.
He looked a little longer. “And green is so not sexy. Pink is the way to go, hunny. It’s a man’s colour.”
Rodyle looked as though he was focusing very hard, trying to commit Zelos’ words of wisdom to memory.
“Next, the hair. It’d be a good idea if you lost the gel. Curls would be nice, and red hair’s the sexiest in the world!” Zelos added. “The pointed ears are good-some people have something of a fetish with them.
“Now, to begin the transformation!”
Zelos put his arm around Rodyle’s shoulders and led the older, less sexy man away.
A few hours later, Rodyle stepped out of his room. His black hair was now dyed red and curled, and it hung to his shoulder blades. He was dressed in low-slung pink pants and wore a tight white top, the better to show off his body. About the only thing that hadn’t changed were his pink glasses-that was the only thing poor, unsexy Rodyle had got right.
“Thank you, Zelos!” Rodyle beamed at him. “My life has been turned around, and it’s all thanks to you! However can I show my gratitude?”
Zelos eyed him for a moment. “Hmm. You’re lookin’ pretty darn hot, thanks to my special care. How about you and I spend a little time together so you can thank me properly? Hatesex is delicious, although since we aren’t officially enemies anymore, we’d have to fudge it a little.” A sexy grin crossed his face. “Mmm. Fudgesex.”
“There’s nothing I’d like better, Zelos!” the now sexy Rodyle exclaimed. “Let’s do it!”
And so they did-over and over, all night long.
The end!
Thank you, thank you. Expressions of gratitude are gratefully received, right here, hunnies~! *points at himself*
[OOC: This is why you never let Vyc get bored. >D]
This story not only will amaze you with my talent, but it should show you the way to defeat one of your worst enemies, too!
Enjoy!
One day, Rodyle was sitting alone in his lair of evil doom and crap.
“Nihihihihihi!” He laughed evilly. “I have just perfected the perfect plan! It is so evil that all will fall in my clutches! It’s perfect! Nihihihihihihi!”
“Stop right there!” a powerful and sexy voice interrupted him.
Rodyle turned and saw the face of his worst enemy-Zelos. He stood, one hand behind his head, the other on his hip. Then, with a casual flick, Zelos’ glorious vermilion locks tumbled forward in a river of curls. Rodyle watched with barely suppressed envy and hatred.
“As the sexiest man in the entire world, I cannot allow you to do such a horrible thing!” Zelos declared in a ringing voice. “I shall vanquish you in the best way I know how!”
“Nihihihihi! You shall never overcome me! Never!” Rodyle threw his head back and laughed maniacally.
Zelos fingered his chin in a manly and sexy way that did not detract at all from his prettiness. “Oh no?” He took a few strong, striding steps forward, until he was only a few feet away. “I think not. For I know your ultimate weakness!”
“No!” Rodyle gasped. “How could you? I have kept it a secret from everyone! Absolutely everyone!”
“Your ultimate weakness is” -he paused- “you are envious, for you are not sexy!”
“No!” Rodyle fell to his knees. “My ultimate weakness-exposed! How can this be?” He began to weep, crystalline tears that caused the merciful and sexy Zelos to take pity on him.
“But fear not, Rodyle. For I shall teach you the way of the sexy, should you give up your evil ways.” He posed dramatically.
Rodyle looked up at him with hope shining amidst the tears in his eyes. “You will?”
“Yes, I will,” Zelos said nobly. “Do you promise?”
“Yes! Oh, yes!” Rodyle cried out.
“Then rise, Rodyle.” Zelos ran his fingers through his luxurious locks.
Rodyle did so, never taking his grateful eyes off his previous nemesis. Zelos slowly walked around him, deep in thought. Then, he spoke.
“The coat,” he pronounced with the utmost gravity, “must go.”
“But I’ve worn this style of coat for three hundred years!” Rodyle protested.
“And it does absolutely nothing for your figure. Honestly, hunny, we need to see that body! Work it!” Zelos advised him.
He looked a little longer. “And green is so not sexy. Pink is the way to go, hunny. It’s a man’s colour.”
Rodyle looked as though he was focusing very hard, trying to commit Zelos’ words of wisdom to memory.
“Next, the hair. It’d be a good idea if you lost the gel. Curls would be nice, and red hair’s the sexiest in the world!” Zelos added. “The pointed ears are good-some people have something of a fetish with them.
“Now, to begin the transformation!”
Zelos put his arm around Rodyle’s shoulders and led the older, less sexy man away.
A few hours later, Rodyle stepped out of his room. His black hair was now dyed red and curled, and it hung to his shoulder blades. He was dressed in low-slung pink pants and wore a tight white top, the better to show off his body. About the only thing that hadn’t changed were his pink glasses-that was the only thing poor, unsexy Rodyle had got right.
“Thank you, Zelos!” Rodyle beamed at him. “My life has been turned around, and it’s all thanks to you! However can I show my gratitude?”
Zelos eyed him for a moment. “Hmm. You’re lookin’ pretty darn hot, thanks to my special care. How about you and I spend a little time together so you can thank me properly? Hatesex is delicious, although since we aren’t officially enemies anymore, we’d have to fudge it a little.” A sexy grin crossed his face. “Mmm. Fudgesex.”
“There’s nothing I’d like better, Zelos!” the now sexy Rodyle exclaimed. “Let’s do it!”
And so they did-over and over, all night long.
The end!
Thank you, thank you. Expressions of gratitude are gratefully received, right here, hunnies~! *points at himself*
[OOC: This is why you never let Vyc get bored. >D]