(no subject)
I think it's safe for me to write my mind.
This is what I feel.
Deal with it.
A good friend of mine died last week.
I never thought those words would have to come out of my mouth.
But she died.
She was my age.
She was my friend.
I knew her on a personal level.
There wasn't a single person who didn't love her.
She was the all around good person.
It's made me wonder why people die who don't deserve it.
I probably would have deserved it more than she did.
But she's gone, and I didn't even get to say good-bye and for some reason I can't sleep.
I can't get over it.
I can't get it out of my head.
It was somewhat expexted,
We all knew that there was no way to avoid this,
We knew it was coming,
We were given fair warning,
And I couldn't do anything.
Why such a punishment for such a loving person?
Stephanie Phelps, you're forever in my heart.
You always have been and always will be.
I Love you and will see you someday.
I've been a mess.
I saw my ex last night.
I knew I probably shouldn't have.
He treated me like shit.
But I did.
And nothing has really changed about him.
But I don't know what I was thinking.
Nothing happened, I just went to see him so I could get everything off of my mind.
I left when his partially wasted friends showed up.
Good idea.
My boyfriend is grounded for something I did,
For my idea,
5 weeks ago.
His mom never knew the real reason why I was grounded over spring break until she found out on Tuesday.
And his involvement in it caused him to be grounded.
So I can't talk to him and have comfort from him when I need it most right now.
I love him so much, I just...I love him more than I have ever loved anything in my entire life.
I mean every word of that.
Another good friend of mine has been bed ridden since Monday.
She had the monster of all seizures, if that's how you spell it.
I'm worried for her.
I love her.
And want her to be ok.
I want her medical bad luck to go away.
But it just seems to keep creeping up with her.
I get to work by myself again tonight.
After I did on Wednesday.
Which means I don't get out at my usual 8-ish.
I get out at 10.
Where is he when you need him the most?
This is what I feel.
Deal with it.
A good friend of mine died last week.
I never thought those words would have to come out of my mouth.
But she died.
She was my age.
She was my friend.
I knew her on a personal level.
There wasn't a single person who didn't love her.
She was the all around good person.
It's made me wonder why people die who don't deserve it.
I probably would have deserved it more than she did.
But she's gone, and I didn't even get to say good-bye and for some reason I can't sleep.
I can't get over it.
I can't get it out of my head.
It was somewhat expexted,
We all knew that there was no way to avoid this,
We knew it was coming,
We were given fair warning,
And I couldn't do anything.
Why such a punishment for such a loving person?
Stephanie Phelps, you're forever in my heart.
You always have been and always will be.
I Love you and will see you someday.
I've been a mess.
I saw my ex last night.
I knew I probably shouldn't have.
He treated me like shit.
But I did.
And nothing has really changed about him.
But I don't know what I was thinking.
Nothing happened, I just went to see him so I could get everything off of my mind.
I left when his partially wasted friends showed up.
Good idea.
My boyfriend is grounded for something I did,
For my idea,
5 weeks ago.
His mom never knew the real reason why I was grounded over spring break until she found out on Tuesday.
And his involvement in it caused him to be grounded.
So I can't talk to him and have comfort from him when I need it most right now.
I love him so much, I just...I love him more than I have ever loved anything in my entire life.
I mean every word of that.
Another good friend of mine has been bed ridden since Monday.
She had the monster of all seizures, if that's how you spell it.
I'm worried for her.
I love her.
And want her to be ok.
I want her medical bad luck to go away.
But it just seems to keep creeping up with her.
I get to work by myself again tonight.
After I did on Wednesday.
Which means I don't get out at my usual 8-ish.
I get out at 10.
Where is he when you need him the most?