Fic: Troublemakers Get The Most Attention (1/1)
Title: Troublemakers Get The Most Attention
Author: Elora
Disclaimer: Glee is not my intellectual property, and I receive no monetary compensation for this transformative work.
Summary: Everything was going smoothly in the Hudson-Hummel home until naughty puppy Blaine shows up.
Rating: G
Spoilers: None.
Words: 1567
Notes: This fic is for blaqkheaven. Rosa wanted somebody to combine the Badboy!Blaine meme with the puppy!Blaine meme and get naughtypuppy!Blaine. And so I did. This story contains the same set-up of Kurt, Rachel, Finn, Puck and Blaine as the pets and Burt and Carole as the humans as The Adventure of Burt and Carole's Crazy Pets. It can be read as happening between story 1 and story 2 of that series, however it can also be read completely as a standalone.
~
Kurt had seen a lot of things happen in his years living with Burt Hummel. Burt Hummel was a really good human, and Kurt was glad he’d adopted him. It used to be just Burt, Katie and Kurt, but when Kurt was a year old, the Hummels brought home a new kitten, Rachel. Kurt took care of Rachel, giving her lots of kisses and snuggles, and helping her grow up. Then Katie went away-forever-and it was just Burt, Kurt and Rachel.
Kurt helped Rachel grow up to be strong and beautiful, and the two of them ruled the house. They got into fights sometimes, but most of the time they got along really well. They looked after their human, and they were happy. They did miss Katie-human a lot, though.
A few years later Carole started coming around. She smelled funny, and Kurt hated her ugly jean jackets, always making sure to puke on them if she laid them down. But, after some time, Kurt and Rachel came around to Carole. She gave amazing head scritches, and she had a bit of a softer hand with the brush, not pulling their fur as much as Burt sometimes did. They were becoming content with her presence…until she brought Finn for a visit.
Kurt and Rachel hated Finn at first. He was loud and big and scary. He seemed to think Rachel was one of his toys, as opposed to a family member, ad it took several scratches to his nose for him to learn the difference. But, over time, the two cats got used to the golden retriever. Finn was great to cuddle with in front of the fireplace, when Burt made it get all warm and pretty. Finn mad a great pillow, and was even fun to snuggle with. When Carole and Finn moved in permanently, Rachel and Kurt didn’t mind much. Sometimes, when Kurt was perched at the very top of the bookshelf, Rachel would curl up on top of Finn, enjoying the movement of going up and down with Finn’s big doggy breaths. They were a family.
~
Puck showed up later. He was just a baby when Carole brought him home, smaller than both Kurt and Rachel. He was full of attitude, but the cats quickly put him in his place. Eventually, even though Puck sometimes did naughty things, he became a good doggy. He got big--almost as big as Finn--but he still remembered how Kurt and Rachel had been bigger than him once, and that Kurt was the boss of the house, and Rachel was second. And as long as nobody was looking, Puck would even snuggle sometimes.
~
Blaine was a different story completely. Carole and Burt already had two dogs and two cats when Carole told Burt that a friend of hers was about to move overseas, and needed to find new homes for her dogs. Carole had wanted to take them all, but Burt eventually talked her down to only taking in one, the littlest one, Blaine. Blaine was some sort of terrier, and only a little bit bigger than their cats. He was so much smaller than Finn and Puck, he couldn’t cause much trouble, right?
Wrong.
Blaine was trouble from the minute he walked in the Hummel’s door. Not five minutes inside, he piddled on the entry room carpet. And when Carole tried to rub his nose in it and tell him, “Bad Blaine! Bad!” he bit her hand and made a run for it, finding a place to hide under one of the couches. Everything went downhill from there.
~
Kurt was beginning to wonder if Blaine’s favorite words were “No Blaine! BAD BOY!” He seemed to do everything naughty. He piddled on the carpet. He rolled around in the mud, then came inside and rolled around on the furniture. He chewed up Carole’s slippers, he left a “present” on Burt’s pillow, and he kept the gentle Finn in a state of constant fear with his bullying. Even Puck was afraid of Blaine. And Blaine didn’t seem to mind getting in trouble! Not when Carole whapped him across the face with a newspaper, or Burt rubbed his nose in his messes, or he got chained up outside for a time, or even when he got locked up in the big cage in the basement and got told, “Stay!” The other pets were shocked. Even one of those punishments would have them behaving for weeks, and yet Blaine took it all in stride.
Kurt stayed out of it as long as he could. But when Blaine started chewing up Kurt’s favorite sleeping cushion, Kurt had had enough.
“Stop that right now, Pup. That’s mine,” Kurt said, letting out a hiss.
“Not anymore,” Blaine said cheerfully. ”I can do whatever I want. I’m bad.”
“Are you bad... on purpose?” Kurt asked, shocked.
“Duh,” Blaine said, continuing to chew the bed. Kurt would have none of that. He hissed at the dog and launched himself, his claws out and his teeth ready to bite. He successfully chased the dog away from his cushion, but when Kurt tried to curl up on it, it was lumpy and covered in dog slobber. Gross. That was it, this was war.
~
Kurt convinced the others to gang up against Blaine with him. Kurt and Rachel would leave dead things, like mice and birds, in all of Blaine’s favorite napping spots. Puck peed on Blaine’s dinner dish, and Finn made sure to put his scent on top of all of Blaine’s markings. Everyone was agitated, and their family didn’t have as much fun anymore.
One day, Kurt slinked by Burt and Carole who were having some sort of important conversation. Blaine was hiding behind the sofa, his head on his paws, not noticing Kurt, and listening intently to the humans talking.
“I don’t know if I can take it anymore, Carole. I know you wanted to give Blaine a good home, but he’s whipping our own pets up into a frenzy. The messes have increased, more things are getting destroyed, and all the animals seem to be sleeping apart instead of cuddling with one another.”
“I know, Burt,” Carole sighed. ”I’m going to start asking around at work, and see if anyone wants to take Blaine. If I can’t find him a new home by the end of the month, I’ll take him to the pound.”
“I know you hate the idea of giving him up, Carole. But maybe our family was only meant to be two cats and two dogs. Five pets seems unmanageable right now.”
“I know,” Carole said, a tear in the corner of her eye. ”I’ll find Blaine a new place to live.”
Burt pulled Carole into a human snuggle, and Kurt watched the dog. He looked sad, and Kurt thought he was whimpering.
“Blaine?” Kurt asked, hesitantly. Blaine growled back instantly, suddenly on the defensive.
“What do you want?” Blaine asked.
“Why can’t you just be good?” Kurt asked. ”If you were good, we’d all get along, and Carole and Burt wouldn’t send you away.”
“Nobody pays any attention to you if you’re good,” Blaine said.
“That’s not true,” Blaine said. ”Rachel and Finn and I are good, and we get petted all the time. Puck gets treats when he does his business outside instead of inside, and Rachel and I still get treats if we scratch the post instead of the furniture. But you just get whapped on the nose or put in the jail. That doesn’t seem very good.”
“I don’t know how to be good,” Blaine admitted.
Kurt moved closer to Blaine. Blaine growled instinctively. ”I’m not gonna hurt you, Blaine. You have to trust me.”
“What’s trust?” Blaine asked.
“It’s when you don’t know what somebody is going to do, but you believe that they won’t hurt you anyway. I won’t hurt you, Blaine. Promise.”
Blaine glared at Kurt, but he made no move to attack the cat. The cat came right up to Blaine and started licking Blaine’s face. Blaine tensed at first, but then relaxed into the contact. Blaine let Kurt lick him, and eventually Blaine even let Kurt snuggle him. He wasn’t going to tell the older pet, but it was kind of nice after all. He started to fall asleep, and barely heard Carole talking to Burt.
“Hey Burt, come see this. We might not have to get rid of Blaine after all.”
“Huh. You think he’s finally ready to behave and get along with the others?”
“I think we should give it a couple more weeks, and see if he settles down,” Carole said, hope in her voice. Burt sighed and relented.
“Okay, we can give it a few more weeks. But will you at least look in to obedience school for Blaine?” Burt asked.
“I think that’s a very good idea,” Carole said. ”If he does well there, we might have no reason to find him a new home. And if Kurt likes him now, I bet it’s only a matter of days before the others come around to.”
“Yeah,” Burt laughed, “Kurt’s definitely the boss of this house.”
As Blaine drifted off to sleep, snuggled with Kurt. He thought some things through. Maybe being snuggled by the boss could make him as special as being naughty. He wasn’t sure yet, but it was definitely something worth pondering.
*!*
Author: Elora
Disclaimer: Glee is not my intellectual property, and I receive no monetary compensation for this transformative work.
Summary: Everything was going smoothly in the Hudson-Hummel home until naughty puppy Blaine shows up.
Rating: G
Spoilers: None.
Words: 1567
Notes: This fic is for blaqkheaven. Rosa wanted somebody to combine the Badboy!Blaine meme with the puppy!Blaine meme and get naughtypuppy!Blaine. And so I did. This story contains the same set-up of Kurt, Rachel, Finn, Puck and Blaine as the pets and Burt and Carole as the humans as The Adventure of Burt and Carole's Crazy Pets. It can be read as happening between story 1 and story 2 of that series, however it can also be read completely as a standalone.
~
Kurt had seen a lot of things happen in his years living with Burt Hummel. Burt Hummel was a really good human, and Kurt was glad he’d adopted him. It used to be just Burt, Katie and Kurt, but when Kurt was a year old, the Hummels brought home a new kitten, Rachel. Kurt took care of Rachel, giving her lots of kisses and snuggles, and helping her grow up. Then Katie went away-forever-and it was just Burt, Kurt and Rachel.
Kurt helped Rachel grow up to be strong and beautiful, and the two of them ruled the house. They got into fights sometimes, but most of the time they got along really well. They looked after their human, and they were happy. They did miss Katie-human a lot, though.
A few years later Carole started coming around. She smelled funny, and Kurt hated her ugly jean jackets, always making sure to puke on them if she laid them down. But, after some time, Kurt and Rachel came around to Carole. She gave amazing head scritches, and she had a bit of a softer hand with the brush, not pulling their fur as much as Burt sometimes did. They were becoming content with her presence…until she brought Finn for a visit.
Kurt and Rachel hated Finn at first. He was loud and big and scary. He seemed to think Rachel was one of his toys, as opposed to a family member, ad it took several scratches to his nose for him to learn the difference. But, over time, the two cats got used to the golden retriever. Finn was great to cuddle with in front of the fireplace, when Burt made it get all warm and pretty. Finn mad a great pillow, and was even fun to snuggle with. When Carole and Finn moved in permanently, Rachel and Kurt didn’t mind much. Sometimes, when Kurt was perched at the very top of the bookshelf, Rachel would curl up on top of Finn, enjoying the movement of going up and down with Finn’s big doggy breaths. They were a family.
~
Puck showed up later. He was just a baby when Carole brought him home, smaller than both Kurt and Rachel. He was full of attitude, but the cats quickly put him in his place. Eventually, even though Puck sometimes did naughty things, he became a good doggy. He got big--almost as big as Finn--but he still remembered how Kurt and Rachel had been bigger than him once, and that Kurt was the boss of the house, and Rachel was second. And as long as nobody was looking, Puck would even snuggle sometimes.
~
Blaine was a different story completely. Carole and Burt already had two dogs and two cats when Carole told Burt that a friend of hers was about to move overseas, and needed to find new homes for her dogs. Carole had wanted to take them all, but Burt eventually talked her down to only taking in one, the littlest one, Blaine. Blaine was some sort of terrier, and only a little bit bigger than their cats. He was so much smaller than Finn and Puck, he couldn’t cause much trouble, right?
Wrong.
Blaine was trouble from the minute he walked in the Hummel’s door. Not five minutes inside, he piddled on the entry room carpet. And when Carole tried to rub his nose in it and tell him, “Bad Blaine! Bad!” he bit her hand and made a run for it, finding a place to hide under one of the couches. Everything went downhill from there.
~
Kurt was beginning to wonder if Blaine’s favorite words were “No Blaine! BAD BOY!” He seemed to do everything naughty. He piddled on the carpet. He rolled around in the mud, then came inside and rolled around on the furniture. He chewed up Carole’s slippers, he left a “present” on Burt’s pillow, and he kept the gentle Finn in a state of constant fear with his bullying. Even Puck was afraid of Blaine. And Blaine didn’t seem to mind getting in trouble! Not when Carole whapped him across the face with a newspaper, or Burt rubbed his nose in his messes, or he got chained up outside for a time, or even when he got locked up in the big cage in the basement and got told, “Stay!” The other pets were shocked. Even one of those punishments would have them behaving for weeks, and yet Blaine took it all in stride.
Kurt stayed out of it as long as he could. But when Blaine started chewing up Kurt’s favorite sleeping cushion, Kurt had had enough.
“Stop that right now, Pup. That’s mine,” Kurt said, letting out a hiss.
“Not anymore,” Blaine said cheerfully. ”I can do whatever I want. I’m bad.”
“Are you bad... on purpose?” Kurt asked, shocked.
“Duh,” Blaine said, continuing to chew the bed. Kurt would have none of that. He hissed at the dog and launched himself, his claws out and his teeth ready to bite. He successfully chased the dog away from his cushion, but when Kurt tried to curl up on it, it was lumpy and covered in dog slobber. Gross. That was it, this was war.
~
Kurt convinced the others to gang up against Blaine with him. Kurt and Rachel would leave dead things, like mice and birds, in all of Blaine’s favorite napping spots. Puck peed on Blaine’s dinner dish, and Finn made sure to put his scent on top of all of Blaine’s markings. Everyone was agitated, and their family didn’t have as much fun anymore.
One day, Kurt slinked by Burt and Carole who were having some sort of important conversation. Blaine was hiding behind the sofa, his head on his paws, not noticing Kurt, and listening intently to the humans talking.
“I don’t know if I can take it anymore, Carole. I know you wanted to give Blaine a good home, but he’s whipping our own pets up into a frenzy. The messes have increased, more things are getting destroyed, and all the animals seem to be sleeping apart instead of cuddling with one another.”
“I know, Burt,” Carole sighed. ”I’m going to start asking around at work, and see if anyone wants to take Blaine. If I can’t find him a new home by the end of the month, I’ll take him to the pound.”
“I know you hate the idea of giving him up, Carole. But maybe our family was only meant to be two cats and two dogs. Five pets seems unmanageable right now.”
“I know,” Carole said, a tear in the corner of her eye. ”I’ll find Blaine a new place to live.”
Burt pulled Carole into a human snuggle, and Kurt watched the dog. He looked sad, and Kurt thought he was whimpering.
“Blaine?” Kurt asked, hesitantly. Blaine growled back instantly, suddenly on the defensive.
“What do you want?” Blaine asked.
“Why can’t you just be good?” Kurt asked. ”If you were good, we’d all get along, and Carole and Burt wouldn’t send you away.”
“Nobody pays any attention to you if you’re good,” Blaine said.
“That’s not true,” Blaine said. ”Rachel and Finn and I are good, and we get petted all the time. Puck gets treats when he does his business outside instead of inside, and Rachel and I still get treats if we scratch the post instead of the furniture. But you just get whapped on the nose or put in the jail. That doesn’t seem very good.”
“I don’t know how to be good,” Blaine admitted.
Kurt moved closer to Blaine. Blaine growled instinctively. ”I’m not gonna hurt you, Blaine. You have to trust me.”
“What’s trust?” Blaine asked.
“It’s when you don’t know what somebody is going to do, but you believe that they won’t hurt you anyway. I won’t hurt you, Blaine. Promise.”
Blaine glared at Kurt, but he made no move to attack the cat. The cat came right up to Blaine and started licking Blaine’s face. Blaine tensed at first, but then relaxed into the contact. Blaine let Kurt lick him, and eventually Blaine even let Kurt snuggle him. He wasn’t going to tell the older pet, but it was kind of nice after all. He started to fall asleep, and barely heard Carole talking to Burt.
“Hey Burt, come see this. We might not have to get rid of Blaine after all.”
“Huh. You think he’s finally ready to behave and get along with the others?”
“I think we should give it a couple more weeks, and see if he settles down,” Carole said, hope in her voice. Burt sighed and relented.
“Okay, we can give it a few more weeks. But will you at least look in to obedience school for Blaine?” Burt asked.
“I think that’s a very good idea,” Carole said. ”If he does well there, we might have no reason to find him a new home. And if Kurt likes him now, I bet it’s only a matter of days before the others come around to.”
“Yeah,” Burt laughed, “Kurt’s definitely the boss of this house.”
As Blaine drifted off to sleep, snuggled with Kurt. He thought some things through. Maybe being snuggled by the boss could make him as special as being naughty. He wasn’t sure yet, but it was definitely something worth pondering.
*!*