(no subject)
i dont know. i dont know how i feel. im scared of this new school. but i keep telling myself that im only scared cuz its new and nothing else. but i dont know if that is the case. im not scared of work, but im scared of being stoopid. of not getting it. of being left behind. i guess everyone is a little afraid of that. but i dont know. its just so hard, so painful, so time consuming, so worthless, so daunting. all i wanted i got over the summer, and now its gone, its done for, time to go back to school. but i cant :-(. i have been told that i just need to give it time and wait till i get into the groove of things and soon itll all be fine. but i dunno. my mom tells me my back isnt up against the wall, that i have options. my dad says otherwise. he isnt nessiciairly the worst dad. but i just like having optiions. saying "you just have to bite the bullit and deal and it sucks but ull be fine blah blah blah" but that isnt working. god i just feel so alone, so abnormal, so worthless, so small. so stupid, so out of my element.