Jesus Foreskin
Now that lent is over, let's talk about the real issue of Jesus (rez)Erection
” I want people to know about the clitoris. I want people to know about open non-monogamy and sexual fluidity. I want us to get away
from a politics of difference. We need to stop identifying with sexual orientation models, with sex and gender binaries, with anything
that limits and polices our desires. ” - Jesus & Mary Chain
"The Man of Sorrows", by the renaissance Dutch artist Maerten van Heemskerck. It is not known if this was actually Jesus or some Christian imposter.
Holy Prepuces - Serious theologians have asked whether the rings of Saturn are made of Jesus's foreskin
Whether Jesus was circumcised was a major theological question in the Middle Ages. There were at least 12 Holy Foreskins in churches across Europe during the Middle Ages. Churches and abbeys at Charroux, Paris, Boulogne, Metz, Le Puy, Nancy, Besançon, Coulombs and Conques in France, Hildesheim in Germany, Antwerp and Bruges in Belgium, and Calcata in Italy all at some stage claimed to own Jesus's foreskin, or a piece of it.
Luke 2:21 says: "And when eight days were accomplished for the circumcising of the child, his name was called JESUS, which was so named of the angel before he was conceived in the womb." (KJV)
A medieval book called The Golden Legend said the day of Jesus's circumcision was the day "he began to shed his blood for us. … [It] was the beginning of our redemption."
The first Holy "Prepuce" turned up around 800AD from Holy Roman Emperor, Charlemagne, as a present for Pope Leo III. According to St Birgitta's De Praeputio Domini ("The Lord's Foreskin"), the Virgin Mary kept the Holy Foreskin in a leather pouch, before giving it to St John. For the next seven centuries, it remained in the pouch, before someone - possibly an angel - brought it to Charlemagne's court at Aix-la-Chappelle.
By the 13th century, Charlemagne's gift, by this time the "best-known foreskin" in Christendom, was on display in the Vatican, according to Leonard B Glick's book Marked in Your Flesh: Circumcision from Ancient Judea to Modern America. It was stolen when Rome was sacked in 1527, but was eventually found again.
Consuming the flesh of Christ was, and remains, an important part of Catholic doctrine - the Catholic Church's position is that the wafer of the Eucharist literally becomes Jesus's actual flesh after being eaten. But the Holy Foreskin had (allegedly) always been Jesus's flesh, and was therefore especially holy (according to Shell), in the same way that the Grail, which had held Jesus's blood as it dripped from him on the cross, was more holy than the Eucharist wine.
Leo Allatius, in his work De Praeputio Domini Nostri Jesu Christi Diatriba (A Discussion of the Foreskin of Our Lord Jesus Christ), reportedly said that because Jesus's body ascended into Heaven, his foreskin must have done too. In G.W. Foote and J.M. Wheeler's book Crimes of Christianity, the authors say Allatius believed that once in the heavens, the Holy Foreskin expanded to become one of Saturn's rings.
The Holy Foreskins weren't the only odd relics. As well as the usual bones and hair and blood, there was Holy Breast Milk from the Virgin, Holy Faeces, Holy Urine, sweat, tears, baby teeth, hair, umbilical cord, fingernails, urine, faeces and other bodily excrescences" of Jesus Christ were discovered at various points.
St Bernard drinks milk straight from the breast of the Virgin Mary
David Friedman, in his book A Mind of Its Own: A Cultural History of the Penis, says anti-Semitism played a role, and that to medieval minds, circumcision was proof that "the Jew's penis sinned against creation".
The last known surviving Holy Prepuce resided in Calcata, Italy, until it was stolen in 1983.
"There's one little strange text in Exodus 4 that talks about how it looks like Moses gets possessed by Yahweh and tries to kill his son," says Stavrakopoulou, " so Moses' wife circumcises their son and rubs the bloody foreskin on Moses' genitalia. " She says that circumcision was an "apotropaic" ritual, meaning it warded off harm or evil, and that it appears to have taken the place of child sacrifice in early, pre-Judaic religions.
.
” I want people to know about the clitoris. I want people to know about open non-monogamy and sexual fluidity. I want us to get away
from a politics of difference. We need to stop identifying with sexual orientation models, with sex and gender binaries, with anything
that limits and polices our desires. ” - Jesus & Mary Chain
"The Man of Sorrows", by the renaissance Dutch artist Maerten van Heemskerck. It is not known if this was actually Jesus or some Christian imposter.
Holy Prepuces - Serious theologians have asked whether the rings of Saturn are made of Jesus's foreskin
Whether Jesus was circumcised was a major theological question in the Middle Ages. There were at least 12 Holy Foreskins in churches across Europe during the Middle Ages. Churches and abbeys at Charroux, Paris, Boulogne, Metz, Le Puy, Nancy, Besançon, Coulombs and Conques in France, Hildesheim in Germany, Antwerp and Bruges in Belgium, and Calcata in Italy all at some stage claimed to own Jesus's foreskin, or a piece of it.
Luke 2:21 says: "And when eight days were accomplished for the circumcising of the child, his name was called JESUS, which was so named of the angel before he was conceived in the womb." (KJV)
A medieval book called The Golden Legend said the day of Jesus's circumcision was the day "he began to shed his blood for us. … [It] was the beginning of our redemption."
The first Holy "Prepuce" turned up around 800AD from Holy Roman Emperor, Charlemagne, as a present for Pope Leo III. According to St Birgitta's De Praeputio Domini ("The Lord's Foreskin"), the Virgin Mary kept the Holy Foreskin in a leather pouch, before giving it to St John. For the next seven centuries, it remained in the pouch, before someone - possibly an angel - brought it to Charlemagne's court at Aix-la-Chappelle.
By the 13th century, Charlemagne's gift, by this time the "best-known foreskin" in Christendom, was on display in the Vatican, according to Leonard B Glick's book Marked in Your Flesh: Circumcision from Ancient Judea to Modern America. It was stolen when Rome was sacked in 1527, but was eventually found again.
Consuming the flesh of Christ was, and remains, an important part of Catholic doctrine - the Catholic Church's position is that the wafer of the Eucharist literally becomes Jesus's actual flesh after being eaten. But the Holy Foreskin had (allegedly) always been Jesus's flesh, and was therefore especially holy (according to Shell), in the same way that the Grail, which had held Jesus's blood as it dripped from him on the cross, was more holy than the Eucharist wine.
Leo Allatius, in his work De Praeputio Domini Nostri Jesu Christi Diatriba (A Discussion of the Foreskin of Our Lord Jesus Christ), reportedly said that because Jesus's body ascended into Heaven, his foreskin must have done too. In G.W. Foote and J.M. Wheeler's book Crimes of Christianity, the authors say Allatius believed that once in the heavens, the Holy Foreskin expanded to become one of Saturn's rings.
The Holy Foreskins weren't the only odd relics. As well as the usual bones and hair and blood, there was Holy Breast Milk from the Virgin, Holy Faeces, Holy Urine, sweat, tears, baby teeth, hair, umbilical cord, fingernails, urine, faeces and other bodily excrescences" of Jesus Christ were discovered at various points.
St Bernard drinks milk straight from the breast of the Virgin Mary
David Friedman, in his book A Mind of Its Own: A Cultural History of the Penis, says anti-Semitism played a role, and that to medieval minds, circumcision was proof that "the Jew's penis sinned against creation".
The last known surviving Holy Prepuce resided in Calcata, Italy, until it was stolen in 1983.
"There's one little strange text in Exodus 4 that talks about how it looks like Moses gets possessed by Yahweh and tries to kill his son," says Stavrakopoulou, " so Moses' wife circumcises their son and rubs the bloody foreskin on Moses' genitalia. " She says that circumcision was an "apotropaic" ritual, meaning it warded off harm or evil, and that it appears to have taken the place of child sacrifice in early, pre-Judaic religions.
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