(no subject)
I've been walking through the school like a ghost these past few days, there but not really there, you know.
Sometimes I find my wind wandering to the best place to be alone in school, where people wouldn't be able to find me.
Sometimes I just want to do something but can't seem to ever bring myself to do anything.
Going to school seems like a complete waste of time now, since I hardly attend lessons. I just find everything to be a waste of time.
Dad talked to me about whether I've ever thought about failing my A levels.
And when I told him I did, he was silent.
Then he told me that it's My Life and I'm Eighteen and I should lead and control My Own Life and they're going to leave it to me to Decide.
I was thinking: Yeah right, like you'd ever agree if I told you I never want to go back to school again, and how you'd totally believe me if I told you truthfully that school is just making me want to fucking die.
But I simply replied "Bullshit. That's just what all adults say. It's all a big fat LIE."
That shut him up good.
Sometimes I think that the harder the struggle to survive, the more I lose my original self. I cannot seem to recognise the person I've become.
Sometimes I find my wind wandering to the best place to be alone in school, where people wouldn't be able to find me.
Sometimes I just want to do something but can't seem to ever bring myself to do anything.
Going to school seems like a complete waste of time now, since I hardly attend lessons. I just find everything to be a waste of time.
Dad talked to me about whether I've ever thought about failing my A levels.
And when I told him I did, he was silent.
Then he told me that it's My Life and I'm Eighteen and I should lead and control My Own Life and they're going to leave it to me to Decide.
I was thinking: Yeah right, like you'd ever agree if I told you I never want to go back to school again, and how you'd totally believe me if I told you truthfully that school is just making me want to fucking die.
But I simply replied "Bullshit. That's just what all adults say. It's all a big fat LIE."
That shut him up good.
Sometimes I think that the harder the struggle to survive, the more I lose my original self. I cannot seem to recognise the person I've become.