Shaving
this might be tmi, but I don't really care.
So, last night I caved in to peer pressure. I shaved. For those of you who don't know, I stopped shaving in college because shaving sucks. Mostly: its itchy. I don't know where people got it into their heads that hairless was more ladylike, because I'm about 400 times more likely to scratch myself than before.
Why, Slade may ask, have I delved further into this crazy heteronormality? Because I now live in the middle of conservative Texas. While most people in PA just politely ignored my natural state, people here kind of freak out. Theres a nervous giggle like I'm hiding guns in my pits or something. I'm actually self-conscious about it now. So, theres a pool party this weekend, and because I'm actually developing nerves about this I decided to give in to the razor. (Also, I gained weight and had to buy a new very pretty suit, but thats another story)
Mother will be elated.
Anyway, the main point of this is shaving implements are scary. They're intimidating. When I started shaving, I used that green gillette shaver with the little ripples with only two blades and a fairly ineffectual green 'smoothing' strip. Men's razors were generally cooler, more gadgety, which I was bitter about. But my little razor got the job done. Then, the Venus came out. I was totally stoked because I have fairly thick hair, and I figured the more blades the better. Then, I stopped shaving.
Roughly, the choice in shaving implements has exploded. Mike, very sweetly, knowing that I don't really want to shave offered to go with me. This ended up being good because I saw the wall of shavers and tried to run away. Some have FIVE blades. I know that three is better than one, definately. But how much difference does five make? Are we going to have twenty? And my little "smoothing" strip has turned into a giant soapy bar thing that oozes goo. How is that sexy? How is that feminine? (...okay, theres a joke there, but I'm not going there) I -almost- don't need shaving creme, but mostly its just drippy. The handle is -weird-. I think it might be more effective than the previous, but I definately tried to drop it a bunch.
Also, the price is ridiculous. It's ten bucks for a razor, and the extra blades are almost 3 dollars each. Considering it is suggested you get a new blade everyone one to two weeks, that is ridiculous! Even accounting for the fact that I'm inclined to only use a new blade every month, that's still 36 dollars a year. And then, there's shaving creme. Why do they all have wacky scents? I got vanilla because Mike likes it. But the names of some of those smells remind me of what I like to call my little pony names: tropical rainbow princess sunshine breeze. So thats another couple dollars every few months. If I did it 'right' I would pay between 80 and 200 dollars a year on that, assuming I don't get a new razor.
I will admit that yesterday, shaving was almost nice. Mike drew me a hot bath (yay!) and I soaked and my new razor was totally awesome and got rid of the hair very well and I was all smooth. I was like ooo nifty new razor! Then, ewwww why is it dripping? (that would be the 'soothing' bar) I was all smooth, and it was weird. And I look weird because I have no hair.
Today, when I shaved -again- (we are testing Mike's theory that shaving everyday will somehow make the task "better") it was more like the experiences I remembered. It wasn't as nice as the first time (granted I was standing, and also attempting the 'no creme' experiment, but that ended quickly). Now I've got red bumps (not ingrown hairs) and I'm itchy just like I remembered (even where I did use creme). And, as a result, I feel less pretty and girly than when I had hair.
WWWhhhyyyy is hairless 'better' and whyyyyy is it so expensive?!
So, last night I caved in to peer pressure. I shaved. For those of you who don't know, I stopped shaving in college because shaving sucks. Mostly: its itchy. I don't know where people got it into their heads that hairless was more ladylike, because I'm about 400 times more likely to scratch myself than before.
Why, Slade may ask, have I delved further into this crazy heteronormality? Because I now live in the middle of conservative Texas. While most people in PA just politely ignored my natural state, people here kind of freak out. Theres a nervous giggle like I'm hiding guns in my pits or something. I'm actually self-conscious about it now. So, theres a pool party this weekend, and because I'm actually developing nerves about this I decided to give in to the razor. (Also, I gained weight and had to buy a new very pretty suit, but thats another story)
Mother will be elated.
Anyway, the main point of this is shaving implements are scary. They're intimidating. When I started shaving, I used that green gillette shaver with the little ripples with only two blades and a fairly ineffectual green 'smoothing' strip. Men's razors were generally cooler, more gadgety, which I was bitter about. But my little razor got the job done. Then, the Venus came out. I was totally stoked because I have fairly thick hair, and I figured the more blades the better. Then, I stopped shaving.
Roughly, the choice in shaving implements has exploded. Mike, very sweetly, knowing that I don't really want to shave offered to go with me. This ended up being good because I saw the wall of shavers and tried to run away. Some have FIVE blades. I know that three is better than one, definately. But how much difference does five make? Are we going to have twenty? And my little "smoothing" strip has turned into a giant soapy bar thing that oozes goo. How is that sexy? How is that feminine? (...okay, theres a joke there, but I'm not going there) I -almost- don't need shaving creme, but mostly its just drippy. The handle is -weird-. I think it might be more effective than the previous, but I definately tried to drop it a bunch.
Also, the price is ridiculous. It's ten bucks for a razor, and the extra blades are almost 3 dollars each. Considering it is suggested you get a new blade everyone one to two weeks, that is ridiculous! Even accounting for the fact that I'm inclined to only use a new blade every month, that's still 36 dollars a year. And then, there's shaving creme. Why do they all have wacky scents? I got vanilla because Mike likes it. But the names of some of those smells remind me of what I like to call my little pony names: tropical rainbow princess sunshine breeze. So thats another couple dollars every few months. If I did it 'right' I would pay between 80 and 200 dollars a year on that, assuming I don't get a new razor.
I will admit that yesterday, shaving was almost nice. Mike drew me a hot bath (yay!) and I soaked and my new razor was totally awesome and got rid of the hair very well and I was all smooth. I was like ooo nifty new razor! Then, ewwww why is it dripping? (that would be the 'soothing' bar) I was all smooth, and it was weird. And I look weird because I have no hair.
Today, when I shaved -again- (we are testing Mike's theory that shaving everyday will somehow make the task "better") it was more like the experiences I remembered. It wasn't as nice as the first time (granted I was standing, and also attempting the 'no creme' experiment, but that ended quickly). Now I've got red bumps (not ingrown hairs) and I'm itchy just like I remembered (even where I did use creme). And, as a result, I feel less pretty and girly than when I had hair.
WWWhhhyyyy is hairless 'better' and whyyyyy is it so expensive?!