You and me are over if your getting high tonight.
Things have been not so good lately. I don't know where my mom's digital camera is, and I know that there is no way in hell I could have lost it. I think that someone might have stolen it from my bag at school. Between having to replace her camera and having to pay for my smoking ticket, I owe her $1,080. Thats $1,080 dollars I don't have and working over Christmas wont get me even close to paying her off. That means I need to get a regular job, but I don't know how a job is going to work out with being at school all day and Insight all evening. With that schedule, I only have weekends to work, and I'm not sure what place is going to be okay with that. I'm thinking of working at the Kitchen (a catering place by my house) and waitressing parties for them. Even if they let me only work on weekends, I'm not sure how Insight will feel about me working around alcohol. I guess I will just have to see.
On top of all the money stuff I've been extremely lonely. Its weird how I was madly in love with someone for months, but some stuff changed and I thought I wasn't anymore. Now after breaking up and being away from them for a couple months, I've now realized that no matter what I do, and no matter how much I don't want to be the person I was when I was with them, a part of me will still always love them. That whole realization has made my insides feel like jello, really really gross jello that your aunt made. Oh, I don't know. Things have just been getting harder and harder, and I sometimes don't know how to feel better without things I can't have.
On top of all the money stuff I've been extremely lonely. Its weird how I was madly in love with someone for months, but some stuff changed and I thought I wasn't anymore. Now after breaking up and being away from them for a couple months, I've now realized that no matter what I do, and no matter how much I don't want to be the person I was when I was with them, a part of me will still always love them. That whole realization has made my insides feel like jello, really really gross jello that your aunt made. Oh, I don't know. Things have just been getting harder and harder, and I sometimes don't know how to feel better without things I can't have.