(no subject)
i hate this. i don't know what's wrong with me anymore. everyday gets worse and i just want to cry myself to sleep everynight. but when i cry i get headaches...and i don't think i could cry anymore...even if i tried to. its like my whole life is just one big mistake after another. i don't even feel like waking up in the mornings anymore...there is no point. its like i don't care what happens to me anymore. somedays i'll wake up and be so happy. i'll love life...and then other days i'll wake up and want to go back to sleep because i'm still alive. i know it sounds dumb. i should be so happy. i have everything i have ever wanted. a great family, who cares most of the time, or at least pretends to..i have a best friend, who is like a sister to me...and i have a wonderful boyfriend, who can always make me smile..even when i am having the worst day ever. but for the past 5 years it seems like i have just been losing my mind. i exercise until i make myself sick..i barely ever want to go out with friends anymore. i don't know how to deal with this stuff anymore. i don't understand what is happening to me...
~*Jessica*~