Leaving her for the cavalry...off for vengeance
I stood up from the chair and turned from Dawn, my decision made. "Dawn..." How would I tell her I was out for revenge? "Dawn..." I mean it's hard enough to keep her still and non-vengeful..."Look, I have to go to the morgue wing and then home to get Buffy's things...for the funeral arrangements. Coroner and all." Great, lie to Dawn, why don't you
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I moved to each section of Xander's hand, not so carefully parting the fingers each time, following a sick sort of organized pattern before moving to the other hand. Once or twice I even looked up at Xander, but it wasn't to glare or gloat at him, just to document the amount of pain he seemed to be in and weight it against the amount given to him by Anya. I had to surpass her, you see. Had to prove myself.
After I'd done both hands, I calmly reached to the side, picking up a roll of duct tape that had been lying on the floor (one of many rolls, as a good geek is nothing without duct tape). Tearing off piece by piece, I forced Xander's fingers against the armrests of the chair, taping them firmly in place (each with about six inches of tape to wrap around the armrest each time) so that they were spread, pulling the eight little fresh wounds apart so the air could rush into them.
Pushing myself to my feet, I dared not look at Warren or Anya as I stood, but I did grab the rubbing alcohol away from Anya before turning back to face Xander. I spilled enough of the funny-smelling liquid on both hands to soak them both, and to allow more to slowly run down his skin into the wounds as time passed. With a clenched jaw I examined just how much pain he seemed to be in before turning back to look at Warren again, this time meeting his gaze straight on with a very faint sort of smug look in my thin smile.
"Was that better than ok, Warren?"
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"Nice work there, Anya. I like the clean cut, so hard to pull off with a crude instrument like scissors."
I beamed stupidly at Warren. It seemed like forever since I had gotten complimented on my violent actions...
He looked at Xander, with that wild look in his eyes...
"Look, Xander. Look at how beautiful she is, like this. Can you see the demon rising in her eyes again? Because I can. You never once really understood her, I don't even have to know either one of you to realize that. This is who your ex-fiance is, Xander Harris. This is where she belongs, spinning in a haze of her own violence."
Well fuck! That was a generous compliment, not to mention extremely flattering in an odd sort of creepy way...
"She's in her element right now. And it's fucking glamorous."
Then, before I could register what he had just said, he yanked me to him and pressed his lips against mine, roughly. Very roughly. It had been awhile since I'd been kissed like that. Xander was much more gentle, but I liked it. Xander never had that bruising force that Warren did, that appreciation for the kill.
"You could have known this vicious beauty. But you were too good for that, weren't you? You just don't get it...all along, she's been too good for you."
Letting go of Warren, I uttered a "He's damn right." My eyes were shooting daggers at Xander,
"You never appreciated me for who I was. Never. You always wanted me to be your perfect little girlfriend, what with the manners and the tact- but I don't need that. This is who I am, Xander Harris, demon or not. This is who I'll always be."
As I was going on my little tirade, Andrew had dragged out the ceremonial knife and was cutting into Xander, trying to prove himself, I'd assume. He looked determined, and Xander looked in extreme pain. This only egged me on more,
"These guys," I yelled now, to get my point across, "They don't care about what I say, how I act. They don't constantly correct me and tell me what the 'right way' to act is..."
Granted, I hadn't known them that long- but they weren't really the best people to judge others' character, I'd wager.
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"That was beautiful, kitten. Well done." I said lovingly in Andrew's direction, proud of my kitten and all the violence I saw in him, finally. I'd always known there was that bitterness, that bloodlust just under the surface of who he was, and it touched me deeply that it had taken my approval to bring it out in him.
Anya blinked confusedly when I grabbed her, but it wasn't long before she was sinking into the force of my kiss in a way that made me want to throw her down and fuck her 'till she howled. But there was no time for that now. I'd have to put both she and Andrew on my 'To do' list for later.
"Look at how furious and beautiful you are." I whispered as we pulled away from each other, cupping her chin in my hand. "You're glorious, Anya. I'm glad you're here."
My words were almost tender, but as I turned my head to see us in the mirror on the wall across from us, I saw the maniac light in my eyes, the genius insanity that had finally burst free. I was proud of myself, of all us. Like mad, bloody flowers, we were finally blooming.
"You never appreciated me for who I was. Never. You always wanted me to be your perfect little girlfriend, what with the manners and the tact- but I don't need that. This is who I am, Xander Harris, demon or not. This is who I'll always be."
I gestured for Andrew to come over to me so I could slip an arm around his shoulders and stroke the side of his neck with my fingers while I stood there and listened to Anya unleash some feelings that she'd obviously been bottling up inside for a long time.
"These guys, they don't care about what I say, how I act. They don't constantly correct me and tell me what the 'right way' to act is..."
"She's right, you know." I said, quietly now. "I'm willing to bet that for most of your relationship, it was all about him trying to fix you, to make you 'better', to make you 'normal'. All so you'd fit in with his idiot friends, am I right, Anya?"
"You see Xander, we see who she is and we appreciate it. But then, you were always too hung up on Buffy Summers to ever really love her with all your heart, weren't you? Well, now Buffy is dead and Anya has begun to realize that all the time, you were trying to turn her into another woman. What to do, what to do?"
"Manners and tact." I laughed now, echoing Anya's words. "Such trivial mortal bullshit."
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Yes... y-yes, that was what I needed. More of that, please. I needed to hear Warren tell me again that I'd done a good job. I needed it fast before I started thinking about what it was I'd done. It was fine so long as Warren was praising me for it...
But then he turned his attention back towards Anya, which I guess helped me just as much as any praise would, because I sure as heck wasn't thinking about what I'd done and more along the lines of what I had to do to make sure that Warren would stop looking at her like that. To make sure he didn't cup her chin in his hand that way and whisper sweet things to her anymore.
The moment Warren gestured to me, I was by his side without hesitation. Because I was loyal like that, and had been for a long time now.
Longer than Anya had... 'Cause come on! She's only been here like five minutes longer than Xander has!
I felt the wait of Warren's arm on my shoulder as he wrapped it around my neck to pull me closer to him, nearly having me in one of those headlocks he used to put me in when we fought about who the better Bond was... only, uh, sexier really. His fingers were running up and down the side of my neck, like he'd suddenly turned into a Bond villain himself and I was the token white cat for him to stroke while conversing with his prisoner.
Now if only we could get Xander to say "you don't expect me to talk"...
Because then Warren could SO say "No, Mr. Harris. I expect you to die."
And that would be just the coolest thing ever.
Anya and Warren were talking now, about something Anya-related that I really wasn't listening to too much. My eyes flickered back and forth between Xander and Warren, just taking it all in. We were torturing someone. We really were like super villains now! Just like Warren said we'd be. And things would probably only get better from here on in. I bet Jonathan would totally kick himself right now if he knew. We made it. And if he'd only just believed in Warren like I had, then maybe he'd be here right now and not pouting away in the Sunnydale police HQ.
I craned my neck, tilting my chin up as Warren continued to stroke my neck. It felt good. Really, really good. Like... like 'let's kick Anya out and knock Xander unconscious for awhile" good. If, uh... if you know what I mean.
Wait, was I getting... uh, you know... thoughts and stuff while we were torturing someone? That... that shouldn't be right, right? No, that's a bad thing. Torture isn't sexy, at least not this kinda torture... right?
I started feeling lost again, so I leaned closer to Warren, resting my head against his shoulder. Warren would show me what to do. He'd know what was right.
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I just stared at Xander. Stared at him, stared at the blood coming out of him. I should feel justified, but I really didn't. I didn't want to see him, but I couldn't look away.
"Thank God he's gagged," I said, rolling my eyes, "Because trust me, I know, he's quite a screamer."
Yeah, maybe a little too much information, but I don't think anything I said could really shock Warren or Andrew.
"Can we just leave him to sit there for awhile and make him think about how disgusting and scummy he is?" I asked, wiping my hands on my skirt. I didn't really want to look at him right now, I kind of wanted to just... leave him.
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I smirked from where I was running my fingers up and down Andrew's long, pale neck.
"Is that true, Xander? Can't hack it in the bedroom, can we? I always figured you for a minute man." I laughed mockingly, my eyes going colder than even before as I looked at him. God, he and all his friends made me sick.
"Well, don't worry about that anymore. I'll make sure that Anya here gets plenty of satisfaction where it counts. After all, I'm sure she'd got an entire relationship's worth of unsatisfied sexual needs to sate."
"You know." I added, almost as an afterthought. "All this time, you and your damn friends underestimated me. You brushed the Trio and I off as a worthless geek, someone you didn't have to worry about because we posed no threat. And in the end, it was us who killed not one, but two of your most powerful assets, your two closest friends. That's pretty ironic, isn't it? Boy, did you assholes ever fuck that one up."
"Can we just leave him to sit there for awhile and make him think about how disgusting and scummy he is?"
"Leave him?" I raised an eyebrow at Anya. "Sure, we'll leave him. But we should probably drop him off back at the newly deceased Buffy's house soon, that bullet wound and those cuts are bleeding pretty badly."
"Give me just a minute, though." I said, smiling sweetly at Anya and Andrew. I then let Andrew go, and walked over to a corner of the basement to pick up a heavy iron crowbar that had belonged to my father once.
As soon as I was within swinging distance of Xander, I went insane. I slammed that crowbar into his face and stomach over and over again, nearly sobbing with the orgasmic rush of doing it. The sickening crack every time I crunched a bone was music. The sound of his nose crunching was like a symphony, and by the time I was done with him his face was a bloody pulp and I was sweating.
Finally, I turned away from him, dropping the now-bloody crowbar onto the cement floor with a clang. I was breathing heavily, all but panting.
"Excuse me, I do believe I rather lost my temper there." The cold smile was back on my face again as I looked at Anya and Andrew.
"Okay. Now we can leave him here for a while. I say we give him an hour to soak in his own pain, and then toss him onto Buffy's doorstep."
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All of this, everything that had happened and how we were going about it, seemed... dirty.
Not like bad or illegal dirty, or messy dirty, but... but sexually dirty. I felt like I was peeking on Tucker having sex in his bedroom with one of his drug friends while high. Or like the first time I managed to unscramble some cable porn. It was wrong, but exciting. It was exciting because it was wrong... and because, you know, Warren stroking my neck was kinda hot.
I was so caught up in my thoughts that I hadn't exactly heard what Warren and Anya had been talking about, but I didn't really need much time to have the details filled in for me after Warren picked up the crowbar from the floor. I watched Warren go at Xander with it, in all it's sickening, forbidden, disturbing beauty, without looking away once. It still registered in my brain - I knew that what we were doing wasn't right, at all. But that's what we'd set out to do, right? We were trying to be super villains. This is the sort of thing super villains did in comics that didn't follow the comic code so strictly anymore. This is what we were supposed to do now.
When Warren finished, he let the crowbar drop and the sound caused me to blink for the first time since I saw the piece of metal strike Xander's body. I found that my mouth had been open, slightly agape, and now my lips were dry. Wetting them quickly, I smiled back at Warren.
"Yeah, we should... we should go to your room or something. I-I hear solitary confinement can be pretty nasty too."
The question is... what are we going to do to pass an hour's worth of time?
With that thought, my smile changed a bit, looking both shy and guilty at the same time. The sort of smile a girl might give her boyfriend after inviting him inside after a school dance, but definitely not the smile I should probably have after watching Xander be nearly beaten to death.
This was so dirty.
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Andrew watched in adoration. I don't think he would ever do that to someone, but he just watched Warren's face. I couldn't help it either. His excitement for hurting and killing was contagious. Hadn't seen it in awhile. Hallie and I sometimes got like that a few times, just going hogwild on a few mortals, but we were demons. We had no souls. Warren was a human, but he managed to stifle his soul and morals.
"Solitary confinement is awful," I blurted out quickly, nodding and agreeing with Andrew. I partially wanted to get a chance to talk to Warren and Andrew. I had a feeling it would be a lot of 'Yeah, and then you did this and that was SO cool.' But I could deal.
Right before we headed to Warren's room, I picked up the crowbar and gave Xander one hard smash across his left cheek, splitting it open and causing it to bleed profusely,
"Mm, that's sure going to hurt tommorow." I murmured before throwing the crowbar down, making sure it hit the knee that got short early.
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I smirked down at Andrew, running my fingers through his soft blonde hair. It was apparent that he enjoyed seeing me like this, was getting off on watching me say and do things that he'd never be able to. And I was cool with that. I was glad to sate his repressed violence with my own bloodthirst.
"You want to go to my room?" I raised a suggestive eyebrow at both he and Anya. "Why don't we all go to my room, yes?"
I watched with both eyebrows raised as Anya gave Xander a good hard crack with the crowbar, feeling the heat rise under my skin. Watching them both like this, seeing the bitter anger I'd fostered in both of them...for me, it was sexy.
"All right Mr. Harris, you've earned a reprieve. Don't worry, you'll be going home soon." I smiled sweetly at the broken, bloody Xander as we headed upstairs. Life was so sweet I could taste it.
"Come on guys, let's go celebrate. Ma won't be home for hours, and there's a bottle of Merlot in the fridge."
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