Farscape 422 - Bad Timing's boat scene (Last scene from the episode AND the show)
I noticed that nobody did this scene, and since my dear intodelirium had her graduation just yesterday, I'm dedicating this picspam to her:
Honey, this is the end of the beginning :)
WARNING: Spoilers ahead.
So. We meet our heroes in a quiet planet, after closing the wormhole that led to the Earth. D'Argo, Chiana and Rygel are on Moya watching the scene unfold, while John & Aeryn are on a boat.
(cut to the little boat. Little boats are pretty much the same everywhere - this is of the rowboat variety. Aeryn is sitting in the stern and John sits at the oars, which are at rest. He seems to be dreading the subject he's about to broach, and keeps his eyes on something in his hand. The scene cuts back and forth between them and their conversation, and Chiana, D'Argo and Rygel and theirs, back on Moya)
John: We have some unfinished business.
Aeryn: (she also seems to be dreading this Little Talk) Yes. We have. (John holds up the object in his hand - it's coin)
John: A year ago - we let a coin make our decisions for us
Aeryn: Not again.
John: Call it. (he flicks the coin high into the air and as she watches it go Aeryn flashes on the memory of that last coin toss in Moya's hangar bay - the coin turning over and over, her indecision... But her reverie is broken by a plop - as this coin hits the water beside the boat and disappears. While she's staring after it, both confused and relieved - John moves closer to her) Aeryn - I have a question.
Aeryn: Can I go first?
John: Yeah.
Aeryn: When I was on the Command Carrier, I went to see a surgeon. I was really worried about what the Scarrans did to me. The fetus has been released from its stasis. So I'm having a baby.
John: You okay? (she sort of shakes her head and nods at the same time while making a more or less affirmative sound) And the baby? (Aeryn's clearly doubtful of her ability to guess how he'll respond and tries to be casual about it - while answering the wrong question)
Aeryn: (blurting) It's yours. I just wanted to tell you. Hope it doesn't change anything. (John stares at her, then looks away, his mouth twitches, but it takes him a long moment to look back and respond)
John: Umhmm... well it changes everything. (Aeryn stares, stricken, but not wanting to show her feelings. John, however - has no problem in that department. He stands up, throws his arms wide and bellows at the sky) WE'RE GONNA HAVE... A BABY! YEAH! (he flips the universe a finger) FRELL YOU! WE ARE GONNA HAVE - A BABYYYYYYYYY!
And on Moya -
Chiana: Wha- what's goin' on?
D'Argo: (solemnly) Now John seems very, very angry. (meanwhile on the boat, John leans over backwards and roars)
And on the boat -
John: WE'RE HAVING A BABYYYYYYYY!
Aeryn: Sit down before you fall down. (laughing, she reaches for him and he plunks back down, panting with exhilaration) Are you all right?
John: Ye-aah. Whoo!
Aeryn: Are you happy?
John: (grinning like a fool) Yeah.
Aeryn: What was your question?
John: Oh God - um... (he pulls something out of his pocket, scrambles off his seat to the bottom of the boat and takes Aeryn's hands)
John: Will you marry me? (Aeryn is stunned and can't say anything for a long moment. Finally she begins to nod - emphatically)
Aeryn: (in a shaky whisper) Yes. (they reach for each other and John pulls her close, onto his lap where they sit for a long moment in a joyous kiss and embrace)
John: Wait. (he removes the ring from the box in his hand and slides it onto her finger, then kisses her hand)
And on Moya -
D'Argo: He's - putting some sort of... looks like a ring on her finger.
Chiana: A ring?
D'Argo: (confirming the sighting) Ah - a ring.
Chiana: (with a giggle) You frellnicks! Didn't you watch any of those - thosethosethose Earth movies? Crichton just proposed.
Rygel: Proposed? What?
Chiana: (a bit wistful) Marriage.
Rygel: Marriage? Idiot! (disgusted) Oh! (he sails off - show's over)
And back on the boat - the happy embraces continue - for a moment. For suddenly the blissful quiet of the place is interrupted by the low whoosh of a small, fighter-type aircraft with broad, flat wings. Aeryn and John look up just as it buzzes low over them.
D'Argo: (on comm) JOHN! AERYN! GET INSIDE!
Aeryn: D'Argo do you know what it is?
D'Argo: (deeply alarmed) I HAVE NO IDEA WHATSOEVER - JUST COME BACK INSIDE! (they all watch as the aircraft banks sharply in the clear blue sky and begins to make another run at the boat)
John: GIMME A BREAK - WE'RE IN A BOAT!
(cut to inside the small aircraft. Its pilot is a man - he's fairly human-looking except for the thick lines that symmetrically crisscross his face. His voice is low and froggy)
QujaganPilot: Tracker scouts were correct. One Leviathan, partially submerged. 2 invaders have exited their ship. Request orders.
Chiana: (cut briefly to her on Moya as she desperately tries to get someone to tell her what's going on) Are they gonna make it? (but the Luxan is in a near panic and he sprints away from her to a console) D'ARGO!
QujaganControl: Do you have target acquisition?
QujaganPilot: Positive. (and with that - his face splits open along the lines that divide it. The sections with the 'human' eyes expand to the sides and the top of his skull tilts back. inside is an array of alien organs, including at least 3 more eyes that move freely on short,trunklike stalks) I scan no armaments.
QujaganControl: Neutralize invaders for analysis.
QujaganPilot: Acknowledged. Neutralization run - beginning.
There is simply - no time. Aeryn and John look helplessly at the aircraft as it approached them. No chance of beating the plane the 100 meters back to Moya. Aeryn turns Johns face toward her.
Aeryn: You and your timing. (John smiles at her - and then his smile fades)
John: I love you.
And they wrap their arms around each other and come together for a final kiss. The Qujagan pilot sweeps low - and fires. His shot is perfect. The embracing couple is hit and he peels away.
And on Moya, D'Argo watches in horror -
D'Argo: NO! NOOOO-OOO!!
And on the boat -
Aeryn and John seem frozen - patches of what appears to be some colorless, shiny substance cover them - and then - as D'Argo screams hysterically - they crumble
Their bodies fall apart as if they were statues made of thousands of bits of colored rock salt that had been carefully stacked to form the shape of a man and a woman. Their crystalline remains fall into each other and mingle. They fall to the floor of the gently bobbing boat and raise a neat little heap on the center bench. They shower over the sides and into the peaceful blue sea.
On Moya, Chiana tries to comfort D'Argo - whose roars and sobs of grief contain no words.
And on the center bench of the boat, the diamonds of Aeryn's ring sparkles in the sunshine atop its heap of less eternal gems.
...AND THAT'S HOW YOU END A SHOW.
WITH THE BIGGEST WTF MOMENT.EVER.
I hope you enjoyed this. Transcript from Terra Firma Farscape Transcript Archive. Caps by me.
Honey, this is the end of the beginning :)
WARNING: Spoilers ahead.
So. We meet our heroes in a quiet planet, after closing the wormhole that led to the Earth. D'Argo, Chiana and Rygel are on Moya watching the scene unfold, while John & Aeryn are on a boat.
(cut to the little boat. Little boats are pretty much the same everywhere - this is of the rowboat variety. Aeryn is sitting in the stern and John sits at the oars, which are at rest. He seems to be dreading the subject he's about to broach, and keeps his eyes on something in his hand. The scene cuts back and forth between them and their conversation, and Chiana, D'Argo and Rygel and theirs, back on Moya)
John: We have some unfinished business.
Aeryn: (she also seems to be dreading this Little Talk) Yes. We have. (John holds up the object in his hand - it's coin)
John: A year ago - we let a coin make our decisions for us
Aeryn: Not again.
John: Call it. (he flicks the coin high into the air and as she watches it go Aeryn flashes on the memory of that last coin toss in Moya's hangar bay - the coin turning over and over, her indecision... But her reverie is broken by a plop - as this coin hits the water beside the boat and disappears. While she's staring after it, both confused and relieved - John moves closer to her) Aeryn - I have a question.
Aeryn: Can I go first?
John: Yeah.
Aeryn: When I was on the Command Carrier, I went to see a surgeon. I was really worried about what the Scarrans did to me. The fetus has been released from its stasis. So I'm having a baby.
John: You okay? (she sort of shakes her head and nods at the same time while making a more or less affirmative sound) And the baby? (Aeryn's clearly doubtful of her ability to guess how he'll respond and tries to be casual about it - while answering the wrong question)
Aeryn: (blurting) It's yours. I just wanted to tell you. Hope it doesn't change anything. (John stares at her, then looks away, his mouth twitches, but it takes him a long moment to look back and respond)
John: Umhmm... well it changes everything. (Aeryn stares, stricken, but not wanting to show her feelings. John, however - has no problem in that department. He stands up, throws his arms wide and bellows at the sky) WE'RE GONNA HAVE... A BABY! YEAH! (he flips the universe a finger) FRELL YOU! WE ARE GONNA HAVE - A BABYYYYYYYYY!
And on Moya -
Chiana: Wha- what's goin' on?
D'Argo: (solemnly) Now John seems very, very angry. (meanwhile on the boat, John leans over backwards and roars)
And on the boat -
John: WE'RE HAVING A BABYYYYYYYY!
Aeryn: Sit down before you fall down. (laughing, she reaches for him and he plunks back down, panting with exhilaration) Are you all right?
John: Ye-aah. Whoo!
Aeryn: Are you happy?
John: (grinning like a fool) Yeah.
Aeryn: What was your question?
John: Oh God - um... (he pulls something out of his pocket, scrambles off his seat to the bottom of the boat and takes Aeryn's hands)
John: Will you marry me? (Aeryn is stunned and can't say anything for a long moment. Finally she begins to nod - emphatically)
Aeryn: (in a shaky whisper) Yes. (they reach for each other and John pulls her close, onto his lap where they sit for a long moment in a joyous kiss and embrace)
John: Wait. (he removes the ring from the box in his hand and slides it onto her finger, then kisses her hand)
And on Moya -
D'Argo: He's - putting some sort of... looks like a ring on her finger.
Chiana: A ring?
D'Argo: (confirming the sighting) Ah - a ring.
Chiana: (with a giggle) You frellnicks! Didn't you watch any of those - thosethosethose Earth movies? Crichton just proposed.
Rygel: Proposed? What?
Chiana: (a bit wistful) Marriage.
Rygel: Marriage? Idiot! (disgusted) Oh! (he sails off - show's over)
And back on the boat - the happy embraces continue - for a moment. For suddenly the blissful quiet of the place is interrupted by the low whoosh of a small, fighter-type aircraft with broad, flat wings. Aeryn and John look up just as it buzzes low over them.
D'Argo: (on comm) JOHN! AERYN! GET INSIDE!
Aeryn: D'Argo do you know what it is?
D'Argo: (deeply alarmed) I HAVE NO IDEA WHATSOEVER - JUST COME BACK INSIDE! (they all watch as the aircraft banks sharply in the clear blue sky and begins to make another run at the boat)
John: GIMME A BREAK - WE'RE IN A BOAT!
(cut to inside the small aircraft. Its pilot is a man - he's fairly human-looking except for the thick lines that symmetrically crisscross his face. His voice is low and froggy)
QujaganPilot: Tracker scouts were correct. One Leviathan, partially submerged. 2 invaders have exited their ship. Request orders.
Chiana: (cut briefly to her on Moya as she desperately tries to get someone to tell her what's going on) Are they gonna make it? (but the Luxan is in a near panic and he sprints away from her to a console) D'ARGO!
QujaganControl: Do you have target acquisition?
QujaganPilot: Positive. (and with that - his face splits open along the lines that divide it. The sections with the 'human' eyes expand to the sides and the top of his skull tilts back. inside is an array of alien organs, including at least 3 more eyes that move freely on short,trunklike stalks) I scan no armaments.
QujaganControl: Neutralize invaders for analysis.
QujaganPilot: Acknowledged. Neutralization run - beginning.
There is simply - no time. Aeryn and John look helplessly at the aircraft as it approached them. No chance of beating the plane the 100 meters back to Moya. Aeryn turns Johns face toward her.
Aeryn: You and your timing. (John smiles at her - and then his smile fades)
John: I love you.
And they wrap their arms around each other and come together for a final kiss. The Qujagan pilot sweeps low - and fires. His shot is perfect. The embracing couple is hit and he peels away.
And on Moya, D'Argo watches in horror -
D'Argo: NO! NOOOO-OOO!!
And on the boat -
Aeryn and John seem frozen - patches of what appears to be some colorless, shiny substance cover them - and then - as D'Argo screams hysterically - they crumble
Their bodies fall apart as if they were statues made of thousands of bits of colored rock salt that had been carefully stacked to form the shape of a man and a woman. Their crystalline remains fall into each other and mingle. They fall to the floor of the gently bobbing boat and raise a neat little heap on the center bench. They shower over the sides and into the peaceful blue sea.
On Moya, Chiana tries to comfort D'Argo - whose roars and sobs of grief contain no words.
And on the center bench of the boat, the diamonds of Aeryn's ring sparkles in the sunshine atop its heap of less eternal gems.
...AND THAT'S HOW YOU END A SHOW.
WITH THE BIGGEST WTF MOMENT.EVER.
I hope you enjoyed this. Transcript from Terra Firma Farscape Transcript Archive. Caps by me.