Inter national "THATS WHAT SHE SAID" day
This February 15th be sure to dedicate yourself to pointing out all the innuendo you possibly can. If your friends don't know what you're doing be sure to make it clear within the first 20 minutes of converstation that "that's what she said." Get creative, even leave yourself open for other people who may think that that's what she said. Here is a list of times and places where it would be most appropriate to spring your best "that's what she said" cracks:
-The Workplace, to customers and clients whenever possible. For example:
Customer: "Is this the only color it comes in?"
Salesman: "That's what she said."
-The mall, preferably by interjecting into a strangers conversation. For example:
Girl talking to best friend: "Have you ever had a toblerone chocolate bar?"
Girl's Best Friend: "Yes, it was the best I've ever had."
You (Loudly and from behind): "That's what she said!"
-When someone has just had a head injury:
You (concerned): "Wow Jim, that looked like it hurt."
Amnesiac (who used to know he was your co-worker): "Say my name again."
You (smiling and walking off) "That's what she said."
-Your local cinema; movies are packed with times to loudly blurt out this zippy one-liner. For example:
James Bond: "Shaken, not stirred."
You (Yelling and standing up): "That's what she said."
-The open airwaves. If you happen to be a radio DJ pay attention, most modern song lyrics leave ample opportunity for you to relate what she said mid-song.
For example:
Evanescene (singing): "You never call me when you're sober"
Radio DJ (interupting):"That's what she said."
-Combat situations: For our men in women in places of turmoil nothing is a better stress reliever than a good joke. For example:
Platoon Commander: "Johnson, you and your squad take the left flank!"
Sgt Johnson: "That's what she said, sir."
-When meeting new members of the opposite sex
Woman: "Who are you and why are you staring at me like that?"
You: "That's what she said."
-The dinner table
Grandad: "Irwin, finish that up."
Irwin: "That's what she said."
-Public libraries
You: "Do you have anything on wankle rotary engines?"
Librarian: "Hmm, that's a hard one."
You: "That's what she said."
-While checking out at the cash register
Cashier: "Would you like any cash back?"
You (winking): "That's what she said."
-Checking out of hotels
Desk Clerk: "I hope you enjoyed your stay."
You (looking upward with a fond grin on your face): "Hmm, that's what she said."
-Classy restaurants.
Waiter: "Be careful, sir, it's quite hot."
You (making determined eye contact): "That's what she said."
-While Working at The Home Depot:
Unsuspecting Yuppie: "I'm here for some lumber."
Bored Sales Associate: "That's what she said."
-While shopping at The Home Depot:
Lot Attendant (while loading your manure): "Look out, this thing stinks."
You: "That's what she said."
Well, you must get the picture by now. It is also important to point out that this holiday was strategically planned for the day after Valentine's, making your job an easy one. So say it loud, say it proud and come February 15th say it both early and often. "That's what she said."
In the international spirit of the event, here is how to say International "That's what she said" day in a variety of languages. Send me a message with some other translations if you know them. Without further adieux; the Rosetta Stone of Innuendo:
Spanish: El "lo que ella dijo" dia internacional
German: International "Das ist was sie gesagt hat" Tag.
In French: "C'est ce qu'elle a dit"
Swahili: "Ile ni nini ambayo alisema
Russian:"Это то что она сказала" prounounced "ato to shto ona skazala"
Portuguese: "Isso foi o que ela disse"
Arabic: Yawm duwiliyy li "haadhaa maadhaa qaalat"
Italian: "Ció é che lei ha detto"
Chinese:
Cantonese-hei hey gong
Mandarin-shi ta shuo
Latin: "illud est quid ea dixit."
Japanese: "Sore wa kanojo ga iimashita"
Or: Kokusai "Kanojo mo sou yutta!" no hi
Polish: miedzy narodowy dzien "to co ona powiediala"
Dutch: Dat is wat zij zei
Romanian: "este ce a zis ea"
Hebrew: ze ma sh'hee amra
Czech: to řekla ona
Irish:Sin cad a duirt sise
Irish Gaelic: is labhair si sin
Hungarian: Õ azt mondta
Andrew Fanco Sent me these tidbits:
Morse Code: _ .... .- - .. ... .-- .... .- - ... .... . ... .- .. -..
Esperanto: tio estas kio ŝi diris
Hip Hoponese: Daz Whut Ol' Girl Sad
Tagalog(filipino language): yan ang sinabi niya.
Macedonian: taja to reche
Ancient Greek: Οûτος ‘ό αυτή έλεξε. Pronounced "OO-tos ho au-teh E-le-xe"
Farsi (national language of iran): une chi doghdar goft
Korean: Geu nyuh ga mal hess ssuh
Pig Latin: "atsthay atwhay eshay aidsay"
Urdu: Wo bhi yeahi kehti thi
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wolof (spoken in senegal):"jigeen bi ko mune"
Icelandic (Íslenska): Það er hvað hún sagði
Cape Verdean: "kel la e kel fala"
Ukrainian:вона теж так казала (vona tej tak kazala)
Swedish: Internationell dagen av "det är vad hon sagt"
Danish: "Det sagde hun"
Lingala: yango a lobaki
Canadian: That's what she said EH?
Hindi: Woh bhi yehi boli
Sanskrit: tut appi ettatt vadami
Bengali: "shey thai bolsey"
Croatian: To je ona rekla
Punjabi: "Oh vi eh-hi kehdi si"
San Fransisco: thats what he said.
Telugu: Adhi koda idhe chapindhi
Norwegian: "det er hva hun sa"
Thai: Sao bok chan nan duey
Tamil: "a-thaan avalum sonnah"