(no subject)
1. Your real name: Jebediah
2. friends call you: Tami
3 What your boyfriend calls you: honey, tami, and lately baby... for some reason.
4 What's a name you once wished you'd rather have?: I always wanted to be Jenny or Amber but now not so much.
5. What is/are the ugliest name(s) you can think of?: Alloiscious, Ethel Berta, Gertrude,
6. What would you name these if you had them as pets?
a. turtle: Tamilangelo
b. goose: quackley
c. pirate: Dawn Garvey
d. a hot boy: I can get a hot boy as a pet? What kind of fucked up pet store is this??
7. If there was a song about you, what would it be called?: I hate middle school
8. What would you name your kids?: Jeremy, Annika, Alesha, or Josh?
9. What would you name a ship you built?: The Titamic (no that's not a typo)
10. If you wrote a book, what would it be called?: Not sure.. but if my Grandma were to write it she'd call it "The Magic Castle" or some crazy shit like that.
Have you ever...
11. Thrown up in public?: if you consider public to be someone else's house, then yes
12. Eaten or drank anything spoiled?: yeah, its called our fridge broke and we had no food
13. Had a rip in your pants you didn't know about? no. maybe. not a big one. gosh!
14. Tripped while checking someone out?: no..
15. Had to pay for something you broke?: uh yeah who hasnt?
16. Nearly drowned?: Yup in Door County when I was 3. My Grandma was standing there deciding whether or not to take her shoes off and Pat jumped in and saved me.
17. Passed out?: um.. passed out drunk, yes.. randomly, no.
18. Had a crush on somebody?: sounds too TV MA for me.
19. Been stuck in the rain?: yeah that blows
20. Been attacked by an animal?: by Oscar the wonder dog
21. Caught people having sex?: haha.. so there was this one time last weekend... haha. best story ever.
22. Fallen asleep while driving?: no. almost though maybe a few times.
23. Felt attracted to someone of the same sex?: not in particular.
24. Actually slipped on a banana peel?: No I dont usually have those laying around
25. Made a wish that came true?: yea
Complete The Sentence
26. I once had a dream... about my dad rollerblading around a hot air balloon on the edges (it was a huge hot air balloon with a road for rollerblading on the outside, held in only by bars like fence-like bars though sorta like at park place).
27. I'm only racist towards...my coop, mexicans and the fucking stupid shit kids at my school. not all of them just the jerk ones
28. I don't even know why I'm... holding in my pee right now
29. I'd give anything to have sex with... Ian. Honestly.. no desire in the "celebrity/other people" department
30. Nothing sucks more than having to... take a shit when you can't. Or puke after being drunk all night
31. If I had six bucks i'd buy... ok, call me a loser, but I want to buy Four Perfect Pebbles because Marion Blumenthal whatever her name is is coming to Jefferson and I want her to sign me a book. I'm an English major after all.
32. It's hot. I should take off my... armpit. I hate my armpits.
33. It's always more fun if you... are wearing a tiara.
34. You can't eat steak without... the red bloody center still oozing with tasty cow blood.
35. You better shut up before I... give you anthrax? I got nuthin.
36. I really like you and everything but... I just cant stand to be around you.
What would you do if...
40. A dirty old guy at the airport slaps your ass?: probably cry. that's just plain scary
41. Somebody was about to steal your car?: probably cry. that's just plain scary
42. You wake up with a billion spiders crawling all over you and your bed?: definitely cry. that's just plain scary
43 You farted while giving a persuasive speech in class?: Okay so I fart in front of the class all the time, but I just kinda let it slip out. I think that even in front of middle schoolers if I farted loud I'd be embarrassed.
44. The person you just kissed tells you they have oral herpes?: Probably cry. That totally blows. Then I'd hit them in the herpe. With my glove covered fist.
45. You have three wishes? 1. marry Ian. 2. my dad to be happy 3. never have to worry about money: this doesn't mean I want to be rich. Only that I don't have to worry about it.
46. The government allowed you to choose one thing to be made illegal and one thing to be legalized?: illegal: driving in the left lane if you're not speeding.. oh wait, IT IS! dummies.. legal: marijuana or the drinking age, not like either affect me.
47. Britney Spears was at your front door asking for jumper cables?: Have her sign an autographed picture so I could at least have some signed memorabilia to show off, and ask her for a few bucks, and then give them to her
48. You had a time machine?: I'd travel to when Ian and I broke up and we'd get back together. And then I'd travel forward to see if we were still where we are today, and if not, I'd go back and break up with him again.
49. FOX gave you a half hour show to do whatever you wanted?: I'd talk about people and things that piss me off. Or I'd give it to my dad and Andrene to start their sitcom.
Would you rather....
50. Would you rather find the cure for cancer or the cure for aids?: Cancer.. I think. That's kind of an equally horrible scenario.
51. Would you rather have the power to fly, or the power to teleport?: Teleport!!! Then I can go wherever I want whenever I want!! REGARDLESS OF LIGHTNING!!! (You dont want to fly through thunderstorms, that's dangerous.. especially if you're carrying a Mary Poppins-style umbrella, something I think is a must have for this season's fashion. I made like an infinity of those at scout camp).
52. Would you rather have the power to see the future, or the power to record your dreams?: Record my dreams. I think seeing the future is dangerous, but my dreams are HILARIOUS!!
53. Would you rather be really skinny, or really fat?: skinny.
54. Would you rather be lost in a forest, or stuck in a box?: ooh.. both are really scary. Stuck in a box I guess.. there are no animals in boxes.
55. Would you rather be in a drama movie, or a comedy?: Comedy, all the way
56. Would you rather be in a hip hop video or a rock video?: Rock. I don't have the ass/dance moves for a hip hop video.
57. Would you rather have your birthday on Christmas Day, or on February 29th?: neither. so there.
58. Would you rather live in the sewer, or in Afghanistan?: wow. That's kind of a good one. I'll choose.. Christmas Day
59. Would you rather be in a mental institution or in a penitentiary?: stick me in the pen yo's
60. Would you rather snow board or hang glide: snow board
61. Would you rather be a ninja or a pirate?: Ninja what?!?!
What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you read the following words?
62. Courage: cowardly lion
63. Driver: license
64. Yoga: ghandi
65. Bakery: donut
66. Roach: cock
67. Mushroom: super mario
68. Sprung: slinky
69. Exotic: pussy jungles
70. Pythagorean: my math teacher from freshman year
Miscellaneous
71. Construct an acronym for these words. (example: G M S = Give Me Steak)...
a. S O L R A K S: somebody only licks retards at koolaid school
c. C H I N A: chinese hands in negro assholes
d. R G P: rip gay penis
72. What is your definition of love?: Ian Myers
73. List 3 words that are clues to identifying a person you are currently interested in: (gay question) 1. streamwood 2. Ian 3. Myers
74. Reveal a secret about you that nobody knows of, but type it in acronym form. itwiwakiwsabtgiwfw
76. Were you too scared to do it?: huh?
77. Who or what is your worst enemy?: um.. well.. my mom. in the form of me. because someday ill grow up and become crazy and fuck my kids up hardcore. so i think that ill just avoid having kids altogether.
78. Who is the last person you kicked?: uhh.. yeah, can't say i remember that. i just slapped dawn's ass though
79. If you had to be a chess piece, which piece would you be?: the queen, duh (ive never really played chess, i dont know)
80. Name three people you know whose names begin with the first letter of your last name: nobody's name starts with p.
81. What's one romantic thing somebody's done for you?: Everything Ian does is sweet. He's always doing something new that shows he loves me. Like that one time he tried to suprise me by coming early but couldn't get into my apartment. Or that one time he was goin to get a hotel so I could get away from the stresses of student teaching. Or that one time he went to the dollar store and found a bunch of teacher's stuff and got some for me just b/c he thought of me. Or that one time he saw a solitaire keychain and got it for me b/c I'm obsessed...
What Is Your opinion?
83. "Girls are nothing but drama.": Tru dat bitches
84. "Only idiots watch The Simpsons.": Trick bitches be lyin
85. "Kentucky is way better than Cali": if you want to fuck your brother. which i don't for the record.
86. "There's nothing wrong with stealing.": uhhh riiight
87. "Alcohol is the answer to ALL your problems.": liar. its just the beginning..
88. "You don't need to go to college to be a brain surgeon.": uhhh yeah ya do
89. "Music is stupid.": wrongo bucko
90. "Your car sucks.": no shit sherlock.