(no subject)
I update this when I feel something important has occurred, or if I have a feeling that just needs to be put down somewhere, anywhere, just so I can feel better about myself.
Tonight, enough has NOT happened for a good long week.
Whether my plans are subverted by others (hey let's call a sax ensemble rehearsal for Tuesday night ON MONDAY so that I miss a Tenacious D advance screening) or by myself (I only have two classes on Thursday? Let's not leave the dorm at all after 11:30 am!), it just seems as if I can't focus on anything. That pesky aimlessness seems to have reared its ugly head again.
Only this time it's not for academic reasons. I am happy in the music education program. I am happy with the strides I have made in making myself heard and distinguished within the program. I think I'm on track to graduate normally (that is, in 2010, as if I had started the degree when I first got here). That's all good
I just need to figure out what else is wrong (maybe not wrong, but could be better). I think I know what it is. I'm trying.
And, y'know, that in itself is just a little reassuring.
Maybe I should go to bed now, since tomorrow will consist almost entirely of saxophones and football for me. Thrilling, I know.
Tonight, enough has NOT happened for a good long week.
Whether my plans are subverted by others (hey let's call a sax ensemble rehearsal for Tuesday night ON MONDAY so that I miss a Tenacious D advance screening) or by myself (I only have two classes on Thursday? Let's not leave the dorm at all after 11:30 am!), it just seems as if I can't focus on anything. That pesky aimlessness seems to have reared its ugly head again.
Only this time it's not for academic reasons. I am happy in the music education program. I am happy with the strides I have made in making myself heard and distinguished within the program. I think I'm on track to graduate normally (that is, in 2010, as if I had started the degree when I first got here). That's all good
I just need to figure out what else is wrong (maybe not wrong, but could be better). I think I know what it is. I'm trying.
And, y'know, that in itself is just a little reassuring.
Maybe I should go to bed now, since tomorrow will consist almost entirely of saxophones and football for me. Thrilling, I know.