Wow, 2008
Everyone seems to be taking a look back on 2008, so it kinda got me to doing so as well.
To summarize it quickly, fo me... 2008 was pretty much stress and change, with a malfunctioning creative outlet.
A more detailed look at it would reveal the reasons behind this. At the beginning of the year, there was a lot of family issues going on. A few months before that, in 2007, I'd refused to continue going to my dad's house on the weekends, as I'd become so frustrated with the environment there. My departure wasn't one done reasonably, however, and there was a lot of hurt on both sides. And there still is, it just hasn't really started getting any better until now.
In the meantime, I'm constantly getting hammered by my grandparents to resolve this mess. Plus then we got the younger siblings guilt-tripping me every time they say they miss me. Can't blame them- at five and three, it'd be hard for them to do that intentionally, you know? Nevertheless, it was hard.
The first half of the new year was also spent in the less than fruitful search for a job. That hurt to no end, and it was only made worse by my stepdad's constantly pointed out upsets over the situation. Couple that with the parental unit's irritation over my computer usage, the Thirty Day ultimatum regarding both these things, and the stress doubles.
Life with siblings was less than ideal. While we got along well in groups of two, one would always be the third one out. Either my sister and I were united in combat against my brother (be it in discipline or teasing), my brother and I against my sister (irritating to tormenting her), or they were both against me (in getting me in trouble or just driving me insane). The only time any of us got along well together was when we were all in pursuit of the same thing. Typically, this would involve entertaining things such as movies, cartoons, or avoiding punishment.
...Did I state there was family-related stress?
Anyways, after that we got more Internet related things. My struggle in finding stability in regards to my religion. Not having or trying at relationships with people out in the real world.
More recently, there's been my struggle with figuring out my new life out on my own. Between work stresses, the lack of free time, the lack of contact with anyone outside of Wal*Mart, it's been hard. Before, I didn't need to have social connections with people here in the real world because I had enough to satisfy me every time I got online. However, my work schedule soon changed that to the point where I'm lucky if I get to talk to anybody for an hour after I get off work and to a few other people at random during my days off (by the way, ivy_chan, you pretty much keep me sane because of this).
Work probably deserves a category of it's own, I guess. Highly physical stuff that leaves me sore (though it's getting better now). Lack of people, frustrations with the people we have at times, and the before mentioned odd hours.
Lastly, this year has pretty much been the lowest point of my creative output, in the fandom and out***. Seems to be a problem for a lot of people this year, though, so at least I'm not alone in it. I posted four short stories/ficlets, made two music videos, and auditioned twice for an RPG. Compared to last year, in which I had three stories regularly updating (one of which got over 100,000 words in a year) for at least the first six months along with various one-shots, this is bad.
Bah. But there have been some good points. The beginning of the year brought several friendships which I have come to value far deeper than most I've had in the past. I can't even begin to express how helpful they've been to me.
In addition, moving out has for the most part been a pleasant experience, stresses put aside. It's also oddly improved my relationship with both sides of the family. We're more pleasant with each other, anyways. When I went back to mom's last week, my brother actually argued with my cousin over getting to sit by me (was slightly frightened there for a moment XD). There hasn't been any awkward moments with dad for awhile either.
Things are finally starting to level out now. I'm hoping they stay that way, and that 2009 brings everything good that 2008 withheld.
***To elaborate on this, here's a meme that's going around.
Year of 2008 in Fanfic
Ah, Tights!: This was started as my attempt at comedy that doesn't involve chibis... Also had to do a lot with my Footie friends at Stealthy Stories, and how I'm about the only one who hasn't converted. Basic working of the story is that the Foot are putting on a play of Peter Pan. Eventually, I was going to bring in my Footie friends (who have assigned roles in the Foot) as the organizers of this mess, along with myself (as an unwilling participant), but it never got that far. Between writer's block and the many changes of people involved in the 'Foot Organization' at SS, it'd be impossible to continue now. Nevertheless, I still liked my cast... XD
Shells: My first drabble. Was okay. I'm not very good at short pieces, though. Originally, this was over three hundred words, and it took all of the condensing imaginable to get it too one hundred. Quality suffered though, as seems obvious to me.
Tunnel Vision: My third anniversary one-shot. As it had to be done on an exact date, it was rushed. Not horrible, but defintely not my best. Raph-centric, and set around the time he's ten.
Seesaw: Despite it's length, this is probably my favorite thing I did this year. Was also something fairly new compared to what I usually write- both in style and characters.
...And that's it. Dear God, it looks more pathetic than I first envisioned it. Makes me want to include my RP auditions, if only to add length. Though in all actuality, said auditions were probably the best things I wrote this year. Heck, maybe I will post them here, just to show that I actually did do more than it seems. I'll ask permission from those who are actively involved in the RP, though, as they may prefer I not.
Either way, I'm going to take steps to make 2009 better for this. I'll write more, even if the majority is one-shots. And I'll get to Cork, I swear it.