The first installment of the testament of King Jonathan

[phytojonathan]

1 Noah begot Shem, Ham,
and Japeth, after the
flood had passed and good
was restored.
2 Then Noah begot another,
Jonathan.
3 And the LORD God saw
Jonathan was good, and
He was glad.
4 All the years of Noah
were nine hundred and
fifty, and he died.
5 Now Jonathan was the youngest,
and he prayed to the LORD
God and He responded:
6 "Build me a kingdom,"
said the LORD God.
7 So Jonathan set out into
Istanbul and the LORD God
delivered him a message,
to rule these people,
and build and army of
Flying Dogs.
8 And Jonathan doth built
an army of thither Flying
dogs and Jonathan doth
take th' civilians under
His orders.
9 The LORD God saw this was
good and He was glad.
10 So Jonathan hath prayed,
and the LORD showed him
His enemy, not from
the Heavens or the Earth.
11 and Jonathan saw this
was bad, and he fought for
a one-month and his
people died out but
Jonathan's army of Flying
dogs were living, and hath
taken over th' Enemy.
12 So the LORD God said,
"Ne'er had I lain mine
eyes upon such lamentable
sorrow, yet victorious day."
13 And King Jonathan was given
a crystal from not the Earth
or the Heavens, but from God Himself.
14 King Jonathan lived all the years of seven hundred and twenty, and he died.

Jonathan, 1:1