Well, fuck.
Jennifer's quitting Wal-mart, which means that one week from today, she'll be gone. She's becoming more and more detatched from me as the nights unfold; and whether it's because her boyfriend is pressuring her to leave, or it's because of her supposed (and this is a highly supposed) crush on me, the fact of the matter is; I hate it. I may have denied it to my co-workers and still continue to do so, but I do in fact have a crush on Jennifer. Too late to do anything about it now, I suppose. Whenever I say anything to her, she responds with something callous or scathing. She's made no effort to speak to me these past few nights; normally, we're inseparable. I haven't done anything to piss her off as far as I'm aware, but obviously, and for whatever reason on her part (probably the whole boyfriend thing), our friendship has become a torrid boy/girl issue. I thought I had a friend in her, someone that cared even. Outside of my family, she was one of the few people in years to get me a birthday gift that wasn't just a cheap and obligated gesture; a lot of thought went into it, and it was very personal. We were friends; she even said I was her best and only friend. Fact of the matter is, I was hoping for something more, and whether she was or not is now irrelevant. Her boyfriend's a real winner; he doesn't have a job, and both her and him live with his crazy family. She's been with him for five years, and under better circumstances, I'd respect that kind of loyalty; however, he's turned a temporarily bad predicament into a permanent one, and it would seem he's content to just dwell in it. She isn't with him out of loyalty, she's with him because her deteriorating self-image has convinced her she can't do any better
But I can't help that. It's sad to see someone like that wind up with a loser, and it's even worse when you know that someone has the power to end it. She isn't speaking to me though, so there's nothing I can do. This is how our friendship ends, quietly between us, but resounding like an avalance in my overly sensitive mind.
But I can't help that. It's sad to see someone like that wind up with a loser, and it's even worse when you know that someone has the power to end it. She isn't speaking to me though, so there's nothing I can do. This is how our friendship ends, quietly between us, but resounding like an avalance in my overly sensitive mind.