(no subject)
ahh how things are changing once again.
i've come to the conclusion that i will never have permanent friends, i don't have the group of people that i grew up with because i moved a lot my whole life. I've not found one person here that shares all the same interests as myself. Most of the friendships i've made throughout living in this town have been short, maybe a few weeks, or maybe a few months. I can say i have two that have remained the same, and one of those which i rarley see, maybe once a month if even that. I would love to have friends that i can call and are always there to hangout with me. I wish i could just put on a face like most of the people in this town and just go along with a group because of who they are or something, but i can't. i've never been like that. If i feel something i'm doing isn't good, then i'll end up ruining everyones night because i don't want to do it, sorry that i have morals. So when i say i want to stay home, and stay in for the night it's probably because i don't want to go out and do something stupid that i really don't want to do. What ever happend to go old fashion hanging out. I'm pretty sure it was lost somewhere between people worrying who they're impressing even though most will infact say they don't care what people think of them, and getting drunk and just COMPLETELY not giving two shits about whats going on. I see so many people that i feel sorry for because i really can't look at them and say "hey, you're going somewhere in life". Regardless, friends aren't people who con you into doing things, or lie to you, or do something or mess up something just so they can feel good about themselves, truth is almost everyone would do that to someone else at one point in their life. I'm tired of it, i'm tired of these people entering and leaving my life in the blink of an eye. I really don't need to loosen up or change, i really don't because honestly, if you're going to judge me because i don't go along with what everyone else does, and i'm not going to act like something im not just to impress you then i'm sorry by all means stop talking to me.
The new year is going to bring something in, and it's going to be a new me that no one under any circumstances can or will be able to walk all over me, or get me to do things i don't want to.
ddflgmnfdgmdf
g
frusterated veryyy
i've come to the conclusion that i will never have permanent friends, i don't have the group of people that i grew up with because i moved a lot my whole life. I've not found one person here that shares all the same interests as myself. Most of the friendships i've made throughout living in this town have been short, maybe a few weeks, or maybe a few months. I can say i have two that have remained the same, and one of those which i rarley see, maybe once a month if even that. I would love to have friends that i can call and are always there to hangout with me. I wish i could just put on a face like most of the people in this town and just go along with a group because of who they are or something, but i can't. i've never been like that. If i feel something i'm doing isn't good, then i'll end up ruining everyones night because i don't want to do it, sorry that i have morals. So when i say i want to stay home, and stay in for the night it's probably because i don't want to go out and do something stupid that i really don't want to do. What ever happend to go old fashion hanging out. I'm pretty sure it was lost somewhere between people worrying who they're impressing even though most will infact say they don't care what people think of them, and getting drunk and just COMPLETELY not giving two shits about whats going on. I see so many people that i feel sorry for because i really can't look at them and say "hey, you're going somewhere in life". Regardless, friends aren't people who con you into doing things, or lie to you, or do something or mess up something just so they can feel good about themselves, truth is almost everyone would do that to someone else at one point in their life. I'm tired of it, i'm tired of these people entering and leaving my life in the blink of an eye. I really don't need to loosen up or change, i really don't because honestly, if you're going to judge me because i don't go along with what everyone else does, and i'm not going to act like something im not just to impress you then i'm sorry by all means stop talking to me.
The new year is going to bring something in, and it's going to be a new me that no one under any circumstances can or will be able to walk all over me, or get me to do things i don't want to.
ddflgmnfdgmdf
g
frusterated veryyy