In the end the only steps that matter are the ones you take all by yourself...
Lately I’ve been obsessed with the idea of getting over someone. Maybe its because I’ve very recently gotten out of a serious relationship, but it seems like everyone has an idea of how long it takes to get over somebody.
It seems like everybody hangs on to something of their past relationships, little artifacts that explain a history of a love. I have always been the cut and run type, when I know something isn’t going to work I cut my losses and move on severing all emotional attachments. When Mike and I broke up it was easier to take down the pictures and give back the knickknacks immediately then to hang onto them. Of course there are still reminders of him, the bird I stole from his room that now lives in my car, the matchbook love note he left beside my bed after a fight, and the squirtle named Hans that cost Mike twenty bucks to win in a carnival game for me. Of course if you were to roam around my room you would find no evidence of the one-year and some change that Mike and I spent side by side.
This has its pros and cons... Pro- I could get to sleep at night without having to call Austin just to hear a male voice. Con- It tends to look cold when a few days out you’re smiling and thinking of a future that you had previously built around him.
Missing my college anthropology days dearly, I decided to do some brief research on the relation to physical artifacts left behind and how “over” the relationship you are.
When I first started hanging out with they guy I have now come to care for there was artifacts from his past relationship with his ex girlfriend everywhere. There was a beautiful pillow that held the main spot of his bed that was decorated with sweet loving words chosen by her, her lovely face smiling through framed glass and a drawer full of her clothing still patiently waiting for her return. Even though it had been many months since they had broken up, she had never really left. He still loved her romantically and his room was evidence.
In the months since him and I have gotten to know each other bits and pieces of the room once so filled with her slowly started disappearing until one day I looked around and she was gone. Even the more practical artifacts, the mouse pad and the pillow were MIA. Even though I sometimes miss seeing his ex’s delicate and familiar face it is evidence that after one year he has moved on.
Awhile ago I hung out with Michael and I looked around his room and there I was, scattered in artifacts that represented our relationship. The photo booth picture of us kissing above his computer, my valentine’s card to him proudly displayed on his dresser and lots of other little mementos that were reminders of the romance we once shared. I looked around his room and the only thing I could say was, “Oh, Michael” as I grabbed him for a hug and a pat on the back. Now I’m sure by now my mark on Mikes bedroom is slowly being erased and I’m so excited to see it filled with the next lovely girl he falls in love with.
Now, I’m sure my theory has gigantic holes, but I feel like it’s a good place to start on gauging how ready you are to move on. As for me, I’m starting to feel ready and I cant’ wait to have my room filled with knick knacks and photographs depicting a life filled with the next man I love.
Rin
It seems like everybody hangs on to something of their past relationships, little artifacts that explain a history of a love. I have always been the cut and run type, when I know something isn’t going to work I cut my losses and move on severing all emotional attachments. When Mike and I broke up it was easier to take down the pictures and give back the knickknacks immediately then to hang onto them. Of course there are still reminders of him, the bird I stole from his room that now lives in my car, the matchbook love note he left beside my bed after a fight, and the squirtle named Hans that cost Mike twenty bucks to win in a carnival game for me. Of course if you were to roam around my room you would find no evidence of the one-year and some change that Mike and I spent side by side.
This has its pros and cons... Pro- I could get to sleep at night without having to call Austin just to hear a male voice. Con- It tends to look cold when a few days out you’re smiling and thinking of a future that you had previously built around him.
Missing my college anthropology days dearly, I decided to do some brief research on the relation to physical artifacts left behind and how “over” the relationship you are.
When I first started hanging out with they guy I have now come to care for there was artifacts from his past relationship with his ex girlfriend everywhere. There was a beautiful pillow that held the main spot of his bed that was decorated with sweet loving words chosen by her, her lovely face smiling through framed glass and a drawer full of her clothing still patiently waiting for her return. Even though it had been many months since they had broken up, she had never really left. He still loved her romantically and his room was evidence.
In the months since him and I have gotten to know each other bits and pieces of the room once so filled with her slowly started disappearing until one day I looked around and she was gone. Even the more practical artifacts, the mouse pad and the pillow were MIA. Even though I sometimes miss seeing his ex’s delicate and familiar face it is evidence that after one year he has moved on.
Awhile ago I hung out with Michael and I looked around his room and there I was, scattered in artifacts that represented our relationship. The photo booth picture of us kissing above his computer, my valentine’s card to him proudly displayed on his dresser and lots of other little mementos that were reminders of the romance we once shared. I looked around his room and the only thing I could say was, “Oh, Michael” as I grabbed him for a hug and a pat on the back. Now I’m sure by now my mark on Mikes bedroom is slowly being erased and I’m so excited to see it filled with the next lovely girl he falls in love with.
Now, I’m sure my theory has gigantic holes, but I feel like it’s a good place to start on gauging how ready you are to move on. As for me, I’m starting to feel ready and I cant’ wait to have my room filled with knick knacks and photographs depicting a life filled with the next man I love.
Rin