Wow.
Today, I was walking back to Stratford after class. I was walking down the hill in front of McMicken Hall instead of taking the steps. It's faster and I look like a rebel not following the same path as everyone else. Well, as I get about half way down, I look a whole lot less rebellious because I fucking bale. I'm not talking "Whoops, lost my footing for a second there." or even the kind where you go down but you catch yourself with your hand so only your hand gets muddy but you save your clothes. I was on my back. I slid for something like a foot. Boy, I felt really cool.
So I get up. I keep going right away. Here follows an excerpt from my stream of conscious for the next minute or so: "Maybe nobody saw. I'll take a few quick glances to make sure. Good. No one is very close. Everyone waiting to cross Clifton Ave. about a hundred yards away probably got a great view of it, but that's ok. I'll deal with them if I have to. Thank God. No hot chicks anywhere to be seen. Go! Walk damnit! Get back to Stratford as fast as you can! Boy, I'm real fuckin smooth. Way to go with that one Patrick Swazey's character from 'Dirty Dancing'. You've got some seriously awesome foot work goin' there. Wait a minute... What's that smell? Oh my fucking lord Jesus God damn mother fucking Christ on a fuckin tap dancing pony wearing a clown suit in the middle of a flock of flying fucking monkeys. There is absolutely no possible way that could have fucking happened."
I look down at my the left side of my shorts. Can you guess what's on my shorts?
a.mud
b.dog crap
c.green fabric die
d.all of the above
If you said d, you are correct sir. Fantastic.
So I get up. I keep going right away. Here follows an excerpt from my stream of conscious for the next minute or so: "Maybe nobody saw. I'll take a few quick glances to make sure. Good. No one is very close. Everyone waiting to cross Clifton Ave. about a hundred yards away probably got a great view of it, but that's ok. I'll deal with them if I have to. Thank God. No hot chicks anywhere to be seen. Go! Walk damnit! Get back to Stratford as fast as you can! Boy, I'm real fuckin smooth. Way to go with that one Patrick Swazey's character from 'Dirty Dancing'. You've got some seriously awesome foot work goin' there. Wait a minute... What's that smell? Oh my fucking lord Jesus God damn mother fucking Christ on a fuckin tap dancing pony wearing a clown suit in the middle of a flock of flying fucking monkeys. There is absolutely no possible way that could have fucking happened."
I look down at my the left side of my shorts. Can you guess what's on my shorts?
a.mud
b.dog crap
c.green fabric die
d.all of the above
If you said d, you are correct sir. Fantastic.