New Update...
Ok...
I understand about the breakup... I had massive trouble last night, but about mid-morning today I started to feel better. I'm still very sad that opritunitys are now closed to me. In fact to be honest I'm pissed about it, but it's my problum. Some friends are trying to sture up a fight about it and the three that have tryed I've put a stop to it. I spoke to Kev last night becouse he's the closest to a objective opinion becouse he has loved me and I've hurt him and yet we are still close. He asked me why I don't kick him out of the house. My responce was simple. I reminded Kev that when I was living with him and Roger and I was out of work, and I broke his heart... he diden't kick me out, and look at how close we are now! I know the first few weeks or months might be rough. I know I'm wounded about it, but I knew up front and I still alowed myself to love. So am I angry with him? or angry with my self for my own stupid heart. In time I'm hoping we can still be great friends. Unlike others I know of I'm not resorting to magic or violance. I will not curl up under a rock and cry myself to sleep. I am Phoenix and I shall endure. I've learned, I've loved, I have know pain, and I have had joy. The past is ment to be remembered, not to be repeted or brooded over. It is time to move on.
I know this is a lot to put out in the open, but I don't have many outlets for my thoughts.
Phoenix
I understand about the breakup... I had massive trouble last night, but about mid-morning today I started to feel better. I'm still very sad that opritunitys are now closed to me. In fact to be honest I'm pissed about it, but it's my problum. Some friends are trying to sture up a fight about it and the three that have tryed I've put a stop to it. I spoke to Kev last night becouse he's the closest to a objective opinion becouse he has loved me and I've hurt him and yet we are still close. He asked me why I don't kick him out of the house. My responce was simple. I reminded Kev that when I was living with him and Roger and I was out of work, and I broke his heart... he diden't kick me out, and look at how close we are now! I know the first few weeks or months might be rough. I know I'm wounded about it, but I knew up front and I still alowed myself to love. So am I angry with him? or angry with my self for my own stupid heart. In time I'm hoping we can still be great friends. Unlike others I know of I'm not resorting to magic or violance. I will not curl up under a rock and cry myself to sleep. I am Phoenix and I shall endure. I've learned, I've loved, I have know pain, and I have had joy. The past is ment to be remembered, not to be repeted or brooded over. It is time to move on.
I know this is a lot to put out in the open, but I don't have many outlets for my thoughts.
Phoenix