The last couple of months ...
... have been rough.
For those who don't know, my mum passed away on May 13. She was only 77. I miss her every day.
She'd been having trouble with her breathing for some time, and I think this time she just couldn't recover. She died at home. She'd managed to press the alarm to alert the ambulance service, but then she was gone. I got a call from them to say they couldn't raise her. I'm still salty about the fact they didn't send anyone until my brother got there, saw she was unresponsive, tried CPR and then called them. Would it have changed things? Probably not. I think she was gone within seconds after realising something wasn't right.
My stepdad is struggling on his own. He's not the type to say much, but I know he's missing her. They were married 19 years, together for 21.
It's not fair. I feel like an orphan now that both my parents are gone. I'd also just moved into a house three days before it happened.
I haven't been able to do any personal writing for the last couple of months. I feel like if I write anything emotional, it might be too hard. I'm still processing. I know my mum would have wanted me to finish the books I've been working on, but I don't feel ready for that yet.
We still have a lot of work to do at the house to clear it of all of Mum's craft stuff. Damn, she had a lot of stuff. I know the last couple of years, she felt a bit trapped in the house, so this gave her something to take her mind off of that, but trying to figure out what to do with all her card-making stuff - some of it was never even opened - is so hard. There's not a huge market for it here, that I can tell. I've got over 400 cards that she made that I have to sell, but between work (it isn't a 9 to 5, Monday to Friday kind of job) and going over every weekend to help sort, I don't have time to set up a stall at the local markets.
But yeah, that's the state of things at the moment. I'm coping okay, I guess. I have my rough moments and I'm sure that will happen for a while. You don't get over these things in an instant.
For those who don't know, my mum passed away on May 13. She was only 77. I miss her every day.
She'd been having trouble with her breathing for some time, and I think this time she just couldn't recover. She died at home. She'd managed to press the alarm to alert the ambulance service, but then she was gone. I got a call from them to say they couldn't raise her. I'm still salty about the fact they didn't send anyone until my brother got there, saw she was unresponsive, tried CPR and then called them. Would it have changed things? Probably not. I think she was gone within seconds after realising something wasn't right.
My stepdad is struggling on his own. He's not the type to say much, but I know he's missing her. They were married 19 years, together for 21.
It's not fair. I feel like an orphan now that both my parents are gone. I'd also just moved into a house three days before it happened.
I haven't been able to do any personal writing for the last couple of months. I feel like if I write anything emotional, it might be too hard. I'm still processing. I know my mum would have wanted me to finish the books I've been working on, but I don't feel ready for that yet.
We still have a lot of work to do at the house to clear it of all of Mum's craft stuff. Damn, she had a lot of stuff. I know the last couple of years, she felt a bit trapped in the house, so this gave her something to take her mind off of that, but trying to figure out what to do with all her card-making stuff - some of it was never even opened - is so hard. There's not a huge market for it here, that I can tell. I've got over 400 cards that she made that I have to sell, but between work (it isn't a 9 to 5, Monday to Friday kind of job) and going over every weekend to help sort, I don't have time to set up a stall at the local markets.
But yeah, that's the state of things at the moment. I'm coping okay, I guess. I have my rough moments and I'm sure that will happen for a while. You don't get over these things in an instant.