INWARD EYE.....

[phoenixlaurie]

Do you think if you were you were an addict, you could resist temptation?

Do you think you cry without a sound?

Do you believe in a place beyond?

Do you believe in heaven above?

How do fuck learn to hate?

How can you twist and manipulate?

I want to fucking know.

I want a reason why you so cold.

Did you just grow to kill me?

Did you find you find a hate passion in me?

How can you rip me apart?

How could you take away my heart?

So I talk to him. It was more easier theen I thought.

I didn't asks him questions.

Just only one.

me: What do you want?

In the end....

It was nothing.

In the end....

He ment nothing.

He did ask me if I was clean.

me: yeah. why?

He just wanted to know.

Then he asked me the question I waiting for.

He asked if I wanted any drugs.

A part of me wanted to say yes. Wanted to be numb. Wanted things back the way they were.

The other part, who was sitting next to jon holding his hand, said no.

me: No, don't talk to me again.

I wanted my life back.

I wanted to be in control.

I wanted to be me again.