TTTB 1
Author: phoenix_writing (phoenix.writing on ff.net and Silver Birch on Ashwinder)
Recipient: Sky_blue44
Title:The Ties That Bind
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco, a few extremely peripheral het pairings
Summary: Upon Andromeda's death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same again.
Rating: PG-13. (Some swearing.)
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic/Raincoast. No copyright infringement is intended.
Warning(s): none
Epilogue compliant? Nope, but canon-compliant otherwise.
Word Count: *cough* Just over 61K *cough*
Author's Notes:You know how some people are concise? How they can write a hundred words and slay you with the precise emotion? *stares at word count listed above* Yeah, I'm so not one of those people. But if you're bored on a sick day or have a long bus ride ahead of you, I'm your girl. ;) A fast read this is not, but I hope very much that you enjoy it all the same, Sky_blue44. Thanks to N for beta-ing for me! Any errors are my own. (Oh, and I was reading a lot of Inception fic surrounding the writing of this fic, so please forgive the Eames influence.)
The Ties that Bind
Chapter One: Past Mistakes
Hell on Earth, Harry had determined, was being given everything you ever wanted with one fatal flaw.
"No, Potter, Theodore will not be looked after by a Weasley."
How did my life come to this?
Harry narrowly managed not to be distracted by the fact that Malfoy still insisted on the name Theodore. It was an important argument, but it was not what Harry was trying to discuss at the moment.
"Someone needs to look after him, and you're still in training, Malfoy."
"Unlike some, I don't have the Potter name to trade in on."
Harry stiffened but tried not to react to the jibe. "I didn't-I only meant that you can't call your time your own. There's no way that we can take care of Teddy on our own. We need to come up with a plan in order to care for Teddy while we're both at work."
"And your proposition is that Weasleys mind him."
In that moment, Malfoy reminded Harry of nothing so much as Professor Snape at his most vicious, about to eviscerate you because you'd forgotten what a boil-curing potion did.
Harry had made it through six years at Hogwarts mostly biting his tongue, and he'd finally learnt to look past the tone and deal with the word themselves. (Well, he managed it sometimes, anyway.)
"I don't think that it's a very strange suggestion, actually. Mrs Weasley would be happy to do it and has lots of experience with kids."
"She's a Weasley."
It was said as though that explained everything.
"Not a fact that had escaped my notice," Harry responded dryly, knowing full well that a whole chunk of the Weasleys would have said exactly the same thing in reverse. "Not really the point, though. I'm certainly not suggesting leaving him with Ron."
Malfoy made a face, but Harry just grinned. He loved Ron, but child management wasn't a strong suit-never mind the fact that Ron worked, like Harry, in the Auror department, meaning that they'd solve nothing.
Not even the mention of Malfoy's least favourite Weasley seemed to warm him up to Molly.
Harry tried again.
"Who do you suggest, then?"
"My mother."
Harry narrowly managed to keep from gaping.
"Your mother?" he repeated blankly. "Does she even like children?"
Malfoy stiffened. "What is that supposed to mean, Potter?"
Internally, Harry winced. He seemed to be incapable of not putting his foot in his mouth when it came to Malfoy. He really was trying to get it right, though he wasn't sure that anyone who was witnessing this farce would believe him.
Who would ever have believed that Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter would be living together and trying to raise a small child?
Harry sighed. He felt like all he'd been doing the last two weeks was explaining himself badly and arguing with the other man-while trying to take care of a little boy who'd just lost his guardian.
"I know Mrs Weasley enjoys taking care of kids and misses it now that hers are all grown. I wasn't sure about your mum."
"Because she obviously didn't enjoy taking care of me."
Oh, for fuck's sake…!
"She cared enough to send you care packages when you were in school, and she's the one who wanted you to be nearby at Hogwarts instead of at Durmstrang, isn't she?"
Malfoy was now looking at him as though he'd sprouted one of Fluffy's heads. Harry cleared his throat and hurried on.
"If she'd like to take care of him, too, then couldn't we split the duties? It would probably make it easier on everyone."
"My mother is a Black," Malfoy said haughtily. "She is a relative."
"True," Harry conceded reluctantly.
There was no way to refute this claim. Pointing out that kinship in no way made someone automatically fit to rear children, while true, would likely only make Malfoy think that Harry was insulting his mother again.
"I'm sure you don't want to deny Theodore his heritage," Malfoy pointed out with a hint of smugness.
"Certainly not," Harry agreed, if a bit unenthusiastically.
Remus, Tonks, Sirius, and now Andromeda were dead. It might be insane, but he and Malfoy were in charge of raising Teddy, and they needed to do it right.
This didn't mean, though, that Harry was willing to let Malfoy get his way all the time just because he was stubborn and it was genetically inbred for Malfoys to be arses about Weasleys.
Logical arguments seemed to be his best bet, though, because emotional appeals just made Malfoy look at him like he had dribbled down his shirt.
Harry might have what he felt were very valid arguments about Lucius Malfoy, but Malfoy had been smart enough not to bring up his father. If Harry insulted Malfoy's mother again, they'd be lucky to come to a resolution before they both needed to go back to work on Monday.
The annoying thing was that Harry really had no way of saying what sort of a child minder Narcissa would be. He couldn't deny that she cared more for her son than just about anything, but he still had major reservations about her life values.
If he opened that can of worms, however, he was sure that he'd hear all about what Malfoy thought of the Weasleys’ beliefs and prejudices, and they'd be lucky to make it back to work at all.
"So it's settled, then. My mother will mind Theodore."
Harry's mind whirred. The wizarding world was so damn old-fashioned sometimes. It put so much emphasis on family lines. It was how Harry had wound up stuck at the Dursleys with no serious argument from anyone, was likely why Andromeda had named her nephew guardian of Teddy along with Harry.
It meant that Harry wasn't going to win this argument because it might be imminently logical, but it didn't involve blood. It-
"Hey!" Harry yelped. "Mrs Weasley is related to Teddy. She's a cousin."
"By marriage," Malfoy pointed out with a grimace.
Harry wondered if Malfoy tried to forget the connection as often as possible or if he had just been hoping that Harry, ignorant in so much about the wizarding world, wouldn't know this fact.
Harry decided it was probably all to the best that he didn't understand the family tree well enough to work out how that meant that Molly-and by extension, Ron-were related to Malfoy.
"Still family," Harry pointed out doggedly and pushed for the best concession that he thought he was going to get under the circumstances. "They share the babysitting duties while we're at work."
He thought about saying something about the fact that Teddy would probably have the best chance of turning out halfway normal that way, but he decided it simply insulted everyone, and it was better not to even go there.
Malfoy assessed him with narrowed eyes for a long moment before he finally conceded, "Very well."
Harry tried to suppress a sigh of relief, feeling as though he'd just won a major concession with the Minister for Magic rather than simply arranging one albeit important detail about his personal life.
"It might be easiest for your mum and Mrs Weasley to arrange a schedule that works best for them."
Because Harry could only imagine what would happen if he and Malfoy sat down and tried to come up with one.
"I seriously doubt that would be wise."
Harry suppressed a sigh with an effort. There wasn't a bloody thing that he'd suggested so far that Malfoy thought was a good idea.
"Why not?"
Malfoy was looking at him like he was a moron again.
Seriously. Snape had died at the point that he and Harry might actually have been able to resolve their differences, and Malfoy had stepped into his place with aplomb.
"She killed my mother's sister."
Harry had been expecting Malfoy to bring up the source of the grievance between the Weasley and Malfoy lines, so this response threw him so completely that he simply gaped at the other man.
He swallowed heavily. "Don't you dare go there, Malfoy."
"Don't like to be reminded of the people your side killed?"
"I think the official Malfoy party line is that it's 'our side'," Harry pointed out snidely, infuriated, "and Bellatrix was insane and deserved everything she got."
"She-"
"-killed Teddy's mother," Harry ground out, enunciating each word carefully and keeping a lid on his temper with a monumental effort. "Don't. Go. There. Malfoy."
Malfoy looked as though he wanted to argue but finally seemed to think better of it, and Harry was relieved; he could only imagine what they would think at the Ministry on Monday if the two of them showed up looking as though they'd kicked the crap out of one another.
"I will contact my mother, and you, Mrs Weasley. If available, they shall meet with Teddy tomorrow and make arrangements. Should they be unable to care for him at the requisite times, we will have to look to alternate care-givers."
Harry was willing to bribe Molly with anything to get this settled, and he could only assume that Malfoy would be exercising similar effort over his mother; there was no way that he'd leave Teddy just to a Weasley now.
"My mother will have to be given permission to come here," Malfoy added sharply.
"Of course," Harry agreed quickly, not wanting to get into another argument immediately following the resolution of the last one.
He knew that it grated on Malfoy's sensibilities that Harry was the secret keeper for Grimmauld Place.
Harry was willing to accept pretty much any permutation of babysitting locations just to know that Teddy was going to be safe and well cared for while he was at work.
"When will you find time out of the busy Potter schedule to allow her entrance into the house?"
Ah. Apparently Harry had missed yet another social cue. There probably was something to be said for having Narcissa and Molly spend time with Teddy. Harry wanted the little boy to be happy, but it would be awesome if he rarely felt as out of his depth as Harry so often did.
"If they're both available for ten o'clock tomorrow morning, I could meet your mother at Malfoy Manor."
Harry hoped that that was the socially acceptable way to do it; surely that was more polite than telling her to show up in the street and wait for Harry to go out and get her?
Malfoy was looking at Harry with yet one more look that Harry couldn't decipher.
"I could meet her at the gates," Harry hurried on. "Whatever's most convenient for your mother."
There was still that strange look on Malfoy's face, but then the man inclined his head.
"Potter."
And off he went. Harry scrubbed his hand through his hair and sank down into a chair at the kitchen table.
Idly, he wondered why it was that they always had their arguments on their feet. Were they truly both worried that they were going to need to go for their wands?
Even Harry found this embarrassing. He'd been an Auror for almost a year now. He was twenty-one years old. Surely he could act like an adult.
He drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Neither of them had asked for this. Neither of them had expected this. It wasn't easy for either of them, but it was true that they were staying at Grimmauld Place, and that meant that Malfoy was already at a disadvantage.
Harry needed to work on being the better man here.
He needed to talk to Hermione.
"Here is tea for Master Harry."
Harry lifted his head and summoned a wan smile for the house-elf.
"Thanks, Kreacher. I could definitely use it."
If Harry wanted proof that it was possible for people to change, he need look no further. He doubted that the elf would ever be exactly fond of Harry, certainly not the way that Dobby had been, but his civility and willingness to serve had increased so markedly over the last four years that he truly was almost unrecognizable from the elf that Harry had met when Sirius had first volunteered Grimmauld Place for the Order. Even if the elf was still thinking half his old thoughts, the fact that he did it silently rather than audibly was stupendous.
Malfoy living here had only increased the elf's goodwill, and Harry would take every small mercy that he could scrabble together. Kreacher spent a lot of time at Hogwarts now, as Harry preferred that he have the company of other elves than continue to rattle around here mostly alone. He'd been checking in on Harry more frequently for the last three weeks.
Three weeks ago, his life had been normal. Hell, the fact that he could consider any aspect of his life normal by contrast to what was going on now told him just how fucked up the current situation was.
"Is Master Harry needing anything else?"
"No, I'm good. You'll make sure Malfoy has everything he needs?"
"Of course, Master Harry."
Kreacher looked a little affronted that Harry would suggest that he wouldn't take care of the Malfoy scion. Harry kept his mouth shut.
This whole thing was exhausting; he was looking forward to going back to work only in the hope that he'd get back into a routine that didn't leave him dead on his feet by eight o'clock in the evening.
And when you could say that about your job as an Auror compared to your personal life, you were in deep trouble.
Harry took a fortifying gulp of tea and then dragged himself to his feet. He'd better talk to Molly right away. He couldn't imagine her saying no, but if there was one thing he'd learnt recently it was that life could surprise the hell out of you.
~*~
Tea at Malfoy Manor was yet one more experience that Harry had never expected to have. Well, having a cup of tea, as Narcissa had explained, because it was far too early and not elaborate enough to be Tea.
Harry had heard the capital. Or he may have been distracting himself with adding capitals to words that might not need them because he was Having Tea At Malfoy Manor.
Narcissa-as she had insisted Harry call her-had thought that it would get them off to a good start, and Harry hadn't had the heart to refuse. He could only imagine what Malfoy would have had to say, and how did you explain to someone that a cup of tea couldn't possibly ever counterbalance the fact that the first and only time you had been here up to this point one of your best friends had been tortured, your hostess's sister had killed a friend, and your hostess's son….
And your hostess's son had lied and saved Harry's life.
Draco Malfoy made absolutely no sense to Harry. This hadn't really mattered when they had basically ignored one another following the war. It was another matter entirely when they were living together and trying to raise a child.
Malfoy was at Grimmauld Place minding Teddy while Harry retrieved Narcissa, and while part of Harry was relieved about this fact, the rest of him thought that as inexplicable as he was, the Malfoy Harry was living with might actually have been helpful in this situation.
Still, though, it looked as though Narcissa had been trying not to overwhelm him. They were in a reasonably small room, they were sitting at a reasonably small table, and Lucius Malfoy was nowhere in evidence. There was even tea and cakes. All a vast improvement from last time.
"I know this cannot be easy for you, Harry."
Had she always been capable of sounding this sympathetic, or had she practiced since the War? Harry couldn't really know, he supposed, given how little he had interacted with her. And if he was going to survive any of this, he needed to leave his prejudices behind.
Heartfelt agreement wouldn't exactly be diplomatic, though, so Harry settled for a very firm, "I want what's best for Teddy."
"And that is what has brought you here today."
Harry nodded, feeling this was safest, and took a sip of his tea. It was very good.
"That is what has brought us all here," Narcissa continued smoothly, "and a unifying desire, as you have cause to know, can make the miraculous possible."
Harry drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. That had sounded … almost Dumbledore-ish. They had all agreed to take care of Teddy. Harry didn't understand why everyone had agreed, but maybe that wasn't important. Maybe he should concentrate on the bits that he could understand.
So he summoned a smile for Narcissa and took another sip of his tea to cover how out-of-his-depth he felt.
Narcissa continued, probably well aware that Harry was altogether uncomfortable-or maybe just figuring that he had no conversation skills to speak of. Harry couldn't imagine that anything that Malfoy had to say about him had been complimentary.
"This is not to say that this process is painless or necessarily pleasant. Inviting us into your home is-"
"-something I'm totally willing to do," Harry jumped in.
His interruption was rude, probably, and not something that happened to her very often if her slightly shocked look was something to go by, but given how Malfoy had reacted, he wanted to make clear with Narcissa from the beginning that he was okay with it all.
The look she gave him now was a slightly reproving one, the sort that McGonagall had given him that had always made him feel like an idiot.
"Your willingness to do what is required is not in question."
Harry opened his mouth again but stopped between a sudden realisation that he had no idea how he best wanted to protest that and the reproving look that he was once again getting from Narcissa.
"This does not make it pleasant; we would like to minimize the risks that you feel you are taking."
There didn't seem to be anything sensible to say to that comment, either, and he raised his teacup to cover his silence.
"I am willing to Vow your safety and the integrity of your home."
Harry choked on his tea and managed to spray it all over himself and the table, putting down the cup with a sharp clatter as he tried to swipe the hot liquid off of his exposed skin while spluttering and trying desperately to continue breathing.
Narcissa's eyes had widened, but she had otherwise remained remarkably composed.
"May I?"
He looked at her in confusion and saw her reach for her wand. He wondered if someone who'd always been on this side of the War would have thought to ask first.
Cautiously, he nodded, and a moment later, the liquid had been Vanished and a glass of water sat at Harry's elbow so that he could clear his throat.
"Thank you," he croaked out as he gratefully gulped down the water.
She inclined her head, seeming especially regal in that moment, and making her suggestion all the more bizarre.
"Why would you offer to do that?" Harry couldn't help but demand incredulously.
"It's your home," Narcissa said with quiet dignity.
"It's Teddy's home," Harry corrected. "And we're asking you to come take care of Teddy."
"Is that what you're doing?"
For a stunned, altogether breath-taking moment, Narcissa reminded Harry of Sirius so much that it hurt. He was used to thinking of her as a Malfoy and all … strict and stuck up and stuff. But the tone of that question had been the slightest bit mischievous, and he knew that it was exactly how his godfather would have said it.
He swallowed. There was really no way that she was ever going to believe that he had suggested her as a care-giver, and he tried to think of an argument that would settle this once and for all and not result in Malfoy killing him when he got home.
"Do you promise to take care of Teddy to the best of your abilities? To care for him as you have cared for your son?"
"I do."
He met her gaze squarely. His voice was absolutely certain. "Then we have nothing more to talk about. My home is located at number 12 Grimmauld Place."
~*~
"Hawwy!"
Harry caught the blur of motion and swung him up into Harry's arms.
"Hey, there, Teddy Bear, how's it going?"
Teddy's small arms wrapped around Harry's neck like a vine. "S'good. Glad you're here!"
Teddy pulled back enough to beam at him, all big brown eyes and messy hair. Harry wondered how the little boy could possibly have inherited Harry's impossible hair when they weren't even related, but he supposed that would be a mystery for the ages.
Looking past Teddy to the kitchen where Molly and Malfoy had just risen from the table, Harry couldn't really blame the little boy. From the look of it, they had been having tea, the British solution to everything.
He had no idea if Teddy had actually picked up on any of the tension, but he'd spent more time with Harry when Andromeda was alive than he had with anyone else who was here, and he tended to be reassured when Harry was with him.
"I'm glad to be back," he told the little boy truthfully. He might not be so sure how this meeting was going to go, but he was quite certain that he didn't want to spend any more time at Malfoy Manor than he absolutely had to.
He doubted that Lucius was going to want to stay out of the way forever, and Harry still thought it would be better if they encountered one another as little as possible right now.
He carried Teddy back to the table, receiving a hug from Molly as he passed her and then sitting Teddy back down in his chair before turning back to see the three other adults in the room all standing there.
He really hoped that this wasn't going to devolve into a fight. Surely, everyone could behave better than that in front of Teddy?
"Potter's manners are somewhat lacking, Mother," Malfoy pointed out dryly. "Won't you sit down?"
He gestured to a chair, and Harry suppressed a sigh with an effort. He'd gone to get her, he'd told her where his home was. How was he supposed to know that if he didn't also invite her to sit down at the kitchen table, Malfoy would look at him as though he'd deliberately insulted her?
Harry smiled hopefully at everyone.
"Yeah, um, how about you all sit down, and we can have tea and get all the introductions done and stuff?"
Oh, yeah. Malfoy was staring at him as though he was a stupid first year.
Narcissa was smiling faintly, though.
"Tea is efficacious in numerous awkward situations, wouldn't you say, Harry?"
Harry found his lips tipping up into an answering smile, mind boggling a bit about the fact that Narcissa Malfoy was trying to put him at ease.
On the other hand, he supposed that that was kind of the epitome of a good host, and while Harry was technically the host here, he was pretty sure that the good breeding kicked in even when you were at someone else's house.
Harry sat down next to Teddy and received a death glare from Malfoy-who hadn't sat down yet, Harry realized, but was pulling out a chair for his mother.
Shit.
Harry wasn't going to make it through ten minutes with the Malfoys.
He sprang up again, but Molly just waved him back to his chair when he tried to pull hers back.
He was probably blushing red as a tomato and looked like a complete idiot. But really, what was the point of it all? Weren't they capable of pulling out their own chairs? He was pretty sure that Hermione would punch him in the face if he started acting like she wasn't capable of doing stuff on her own.
"It's all right, Harry, dear. I know you weren't raised that way," Molly said kindly as she sat down.
Harry suppressed a frown with an effort. Not having learnt something at the Dursley's had always struck him as one of the better reasons to pick it up later in life. But he'd stayed with the Weasleys on multiple occasions. He knew full well that they didn't act like this normally. Of course, he didn't normally see Weasleys entertaining Malfoys or vice versa, so this was probably company manners.
At least there weren't any rogue house-elves around to destroy the beautiful pudding. In fact, there wasn't pudding at all, because it was just mid-morning, and-
"Kreacher is bringing tea for everyone, Master Harry. He is-"
Harry turned in confusion as the house-elf cut off abruptly, and he frowned sharply at the utterly cowed, servile pose that the elderly elf had taken, hunched in on himself as though he expected to be punished, as though-as though he were in the presence of a master who was going to hurt him.
With a curiously detached part of himself Harry actually felt the blood draining out of his face. He'd thought he'd known what he was doing inviting the woman here, but maybe he hadn't thought it through nearly as well as he should have.
He stumbled to his feet, chair rocking back inelegantly, all eyes drawn to him.
"Kreacher, could you give everyone their tea and then go see how Winky is doing at Hogwarts, please? Excuse me, everyone. I, uh, need to-" No excuses sprang to his frantically reeling mind. "-go now. Enjoy your tea."
He Apparated just as the babble of voices started, mind preserving the look of utter disdain on Malfoy's face, the worry on Molly's, the confusion on Teddy's, and the pained comprehension on Narcissa's.
Harry sank down to the ground, pulled his knees up to his chest, and practiced his deep breathing.
Okay. There was no need to panic. He hadn't cursed anyone or said anything that he was going to regret, so that was good. It wasn't like he hadn't known what had happened to Sirius before this, and it wasn't as though this moment of him being an idiot was going to change any of that.
He knew who had killed Sirius literally, knew all about why the man had been there, had nearly got all his friends killed, and had already destroyed someone's office over the debacle.
He was twenty-one years old and an Auror. He'd agreed to take care of Teddy, and while he hadn't known exactly what that would entail, he'd known that it wasn't always going to be easy.
So it was going to be harder to take care of Teddy when Malfoy wouldn't ever talk to him again. Harry had been through "harder" before, and he was quite sure that he was going to have to live through it again.
He missed Remus and Sirius, missed the people who would sympathise with him right now. There were people he could talk to, of course, but it wasn't the same. Ron would do nothing but insult the Malfoys, and while part of Harry was sure that that would make him feel better, it would hardly help his home life.
Hermione would let him vent and probably help him be practical about the whole thing, which he definitely needed to do, but since he knew that already, he wasn't so sure that it would help. And he didn't want to-These weren't happy memories for any of them, and he hated to bring up the War and make other people dwell on it when he could avoid it. So many people had lost so much, and it was surely better if they could all move on without Harry sobbing drama all over them.
Sirius had gone through the Veil years ago, and Harry couldn't let the past control him.
He had the feeling that he was going to be repeating that to himself a lot over the next little while.
He rose to his feet, brushing the dirt and grass off his trousers. He could only imagine what sort of etiquette rules he'd broken when it came to Disapparating in his guests' faces like that.
Oh, well.
He brushed a hand across the gravestone in front of him.
"Sorry I'm so scattered today, Mum, Dad. I'll try to come back and make more sense later."
He Apparated to the front step and headed in the normal way, figuring that that had to be more polite than anything else that he had done this morning.
Nothing in life seemed to have prepared him for spending a lot of time with Malfoys, and at this point, he simply needed to accept the necessity and figure out how to make it work.
So far, he wasn't doing very well.
He found that they'd all moved to the library. Molly and Teddy were on the floor playing with some blocks. They were much cooler than Muggle blocks, changing colours and sealing together as they were placed so that you could actually build structures that were solid.
The two Malfoys had been sitting in the two armchairs next to the fire watching the play on the floor, but when Harry sheepishly slunk into the room, Narcissa immediately rose and came over to him.
This was a sharp contrast to her son, who was glaring at Harry again.
"I'm sorry," Harry apologized as soon as Narcissa was within range. "That wasn't very good manners."
"To the contrary. While you may have been a little … abrupt, what would you have done had you stayed?"
Harry sighed. "I thought I'd give making a good impression a try, since I've been doing so badly so far, but it doesn't seem to be working very well."
Narcissa patted his arm. "Give it time, Harry."
Across the room, Malfoy looked almost as stunned as Harry was by the contact.
Harry appreciated the vote of confidence from someone, though. In some ways, all they had was time-about thirteen more years until Teddy graduated from Hogwarts-only the longer it took to get everything settled, the more disconcerting it would be for Teddy.
The poor boy's life had been practically nothing but upheaval, and Harry really didn't want to be responsible for any more.
"Thank you for doing this," he blurted out.
She looked at him curiously.
"I mean, this probably isn't what you thought you'd be doing right now, and Malfoy and I can't do it on our own, and you didn't have to say yes, so just … thanks. You keep saying it can't be easy for me, but it can't be easy for you, either."
She smiled at him again, and Harry realised why people actually liked the Malfoys. They were bloody charming when they wanted to be, when they … liked you?
"I am happy to help, Harry. Perhaps if you have a moment while Teddy is otherwise occupied, we could speak with your house-elf in the kitchen?"
Oh, yeah, like Harry wanted to do that.
But it was a very logical suggestion, and Harry found himself escorting Narcissa down the corridor to the kitchen.
"You have made considerable changes to the house."
Harry looked at her in surprise.
"I have not been in many years, but I do recall the … gloom," she said delicately.
Harry snorted and said without thought, "I wanted the Bitch off the wall."
He flushed as soon as he realised what he'd said in front of Narcissa Malfoy, of all people, but her lips had tipped up faintly. Improbably enough, she seemed to be amused. He was reminded of Sirius again, and swallowed, wondering if that was going to be happening a lot more frequently now.
Harry cleared his throat. "Turns out I had to take the entire wall down for that, and then it seemed like I might as well fix up everything I wanted fixed."
"A steadfast resolution. I believe it is more suited to raising a child now."
Harry rather thought so.
They reached the kitchen, and Harry summoned Kreacher and then watched Narcissa demonstrate to him that she would have no problem taking care of small children. She did her best to clarify that she was not his master and that she was to have no power over him.
Harry decided that he'd maybe suggest the elf spend even more time at Hogwarts, but it still seemed … promising. Harry remembered how Sirius had treated Kreacher and hoped that, for once, he was making the very right choice, and no one he cared about was going to suffer as a result.
~*~
Monday morning meetings with Hermione had been a regular occurrence for over a year, ever since the Monday morning following her cataclysmic split with Ron. She'd progressed well past canaries of doom at this point, after all, and Harry had wanted to make sure she wasn't headed for Azkaban.
Thankfully, nothing as life-altering had occurred since, but he had maintained the habit, and since she always made time no matter how busy she was, he was pretty sure she appreciated it, too.
It helped ensure that they stayed connected; it was hard to miss Ron, even though they were not partnered in the Auror Department. While pretty much everyone who wasn't Ron or Lavender took Hermione's side, they had too many friends in common for it to be altogether comfortable, and Hermione stood a good chance of disappearing into the Department of Mysteries and never being seen from again if Harry didn't keep a close eye on her.
"Welcome back," Hermione said warmly, rising from her desk-which was piled ridiculously high with books-to come give him a hug and a kiss. "How are you doing?"
He really wasn't sure how to answer her.
"I'd say it's the most insane thing that's ever happened to me. That's what it feels like at the moment, anyway."
She laughed a little. "Oh, Harry. That bad?"
"You try living with Malfoy and raising a three year old."
She wrinkled her nose. "Pass, if you please. I thought you two were getting on all right?"
He made a face. "Otherwise known as ignoring one another, 'Mione. Now we live together, and we're supposed to be making joint decisions as we take care of a kid."
"How's that going?"
"Molly and Narcissa are taking care of Teddy while we're at work."
Her eyebrows rose.
"Joint decisions," he reminded her. "And I seem to be getting on better with Narcissa than with Malfoy, and it's just … weird," he finished lamely.
She laughed again but said soothingly, "You're doing something you've never done before. It's bound to be a little strange."
They both knew that wasn't why this was weird, but he appreciated the effort and summoned a smile for her from somewhere.
"How can I help?" she asked.
"I need to add Malfoy Manor onto the Floo Network at Grimmauld Place."
"Last I checked, Aurors could do that."
"Thought it might raise fewer questions if you did it."
Her lips tightened, as they always did when Ron was brought up, even obliquely, but then she softened. "Of course."
"And is there, uh, anything special that I need to do if I'm sharing the Secret on paper?"
Her eyebrows rose towards her hairline. "You're still utter crap at research, aren't you?"
He grinned at her. "You're still the best source out there, especially now; all you do is research."
Her look was arch. "You mean all I can admit to you that I do is research."
He laughed. "All right, Secret Agent Woman. Answering my question?"
"You're sharing the Secret. That's all that matters."
He nodded his understanding and cleared his throat. "So, how's the research coming?"
She laughed again but allowed him to change the subject, and Harry reflected that he had the best friends in the world.
He'd defeated the bloody Dark Lord with their help. This had to be easy by comparison, right?
Recipient: Sky_blue44
Title:The Ties That Bind
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco, a few extremely peripheral het pairings
Summary: Upon Andromeda's death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same again.
Rating: PG-13. (Some swearing.)
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic/Raincoast. No copyright infringement is intended.
Warning(s): none
Epilogue compliant? Nope, but canon-compliant otherwise.
Word Count: *cough* Just over 61K *cough*
Author's Notes:You know how some people are concise? How they can write a hundred words and slay you with the precise emotion? *stares at word count listed above* Yeah, I'm so not one of those people. But if you're bored on a sick day or have a long bus ride ahead of you, I'm your girl. ;) A fast read this is not, but I hope very much that you enjoy it all the same, Sky_blue44. Thanks to N for beta-ing for me! Any errors are my own. (Oh, and I was reading a lot of Inception fic surrounding the writing of this fic, so please forgive the Eames influence.)
The Ties that Bind
Chapter One: Past Mistakes
Hell on Earth, Harry had determined, was being given everything you ever wanted with one fatal flaw.
"No, Potter, Theodore will not be looked after by a Weasley."
How did my life come to this?
Harry narrowly managed not to be distracted by the fact that Malfoy still insisted on the name Theodore. It was an important argument, but it was not what Harry was trying to discuss at the moment.
"Someone needs to look after him, and you're still in training, Malfoy."
"Unlike some, I don't have the Potter name to trade in on."
Harry stiffened but tried not to react to the jibe. "I didn't-I only meant that you can't call your time your own. There's no way that we can take care of Teddy on our own. We need to come up with a plan in order to care for Teddy while we're both at work."
"And your proposition is that Weasleys mind him."
In that moment, Malfoy reminded Harry of nothing so much as Professor Snape at his most vicious, about to eviscerate you because you'd forgotten what a boil-curing potion did.
Harry had made it through six years at Hogwarts mostly biting his tongue, and he'd finally learnt to look past the tone and deal with the word themselves. (Well, he managed it sometimes, anyway.)
"I don't think that it's a very strange suggestion, actually. Mrs Weasley would be happy to do it and has lots of experience with kids."
"She's a Weasley."
It was said as though that explained everything.
"Not a fact that had escaped my notice," Harry responded dryly, knowing full well that a whole chunk of the Weasleys would have said exactly the same thing in reverse. "Not really the point, though. I'm certainly not suggesting leaving him with Ron."
Malfoy made a face, but Harry just grinned. He loved Ron, but child management wasn't a strong suit-never mind the fact that Ron worked, like Harry, in the Auror department, meaning that they'd solve nothing.
Not even the mention of Malfoy's least favourite Weasley seemed to warm him up to Molly.
Harry tried again.
"Who do you suggest, then?"
"My mother."
Harry narrowly managed to keep from gaping.
"Your mother?" he repeated blankly. "Does she even like children?"
Malfoy stiffened. "What is that supposed to mean, Potter?"
Internally, Harry winced. He seemed to be incapable of not putting his foot in his mouth when it came to Malfoy. He really was trying to get it right, though he wasn't sure that anyone who was witnessing this farce would believe him.
Who would ever have believed that Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter would be living together and trying to raise a small child?
Harry sighed. He felt like all he'd been doing the last two weeks was explaining himself badly and arguing with the other man-while trying to take care of a little boy who'd just lost his guardian.
"I know Mrs Weasley enjoys taking care of kids and misses it now that hers are all grown. I wasn't sure about your mum."
"Because she obviously didn't enjoy taking care of me."
Oh, for fuck's sake…!
"She cared enough to send you care packages when you were in school, and she's the one who wanted you to be nearby at Hogwarts instead of at Durmstrang, isn't she?"
Malfoy was now looking at him as though he'd sprouted one of Fluffy's heads. Harry cleared his throat and hurried on.
"If she'd like to take care of him, too, then couldn't we split the duties? It would probably make it easier on everyone."
"My mother is a Black," Malfoy said haughtily. "She is a relative."
"True," Harry conceded reluctantly.
There was no way to refute this claim. Pointing out that kinship in no way made someone automatically fit to rear children, while true, would likely only make Malfoy think that Harry was insulting his mother again.
"I'm sure you don't want to deny Theodore his heritage," Malfoy pointed out with a hint of smugness.
"Certainly not," Harry agreed, if a bit unenthusiastically.
Remus, Tonks, Sirius, and now Andromeda were dead. It might be insane, but he and Malfoy were in charge of raising Teddy, and they needed to do it right.
This didn't mean, though, that Harry was willing to let Malfoy get his way all the time just because he was stubborn and it was genetically inbred for Malfoys to be arses about Weasleys.
Logical arguments seemed to be his best bet, though, because emotional appeals just made Malfoy look at him like he had dribbled down his shirt.
Harry might have what he felt were very valid arguments about Lucius Malfoy, but Malfoy had been smart enough not to bring up his father. If Harry insulted Malfoy's mother again, they'd be lucky to come to a resolution before they both needed to go back to work on Monday.
The annoying thing was that Harry really had no way of saying what sort of a child minder Narcissa would be. He couldn't deny that she cared more for her son than just about anything, but he still had major reservations about her life values.
If he opened that can of worms, however, he was sure that he'd hear all about what Malfoy thought of the Weasleys’ beliefs and prejudices, and they'd be lucky to make it back to work at all.
"So it's settled, then. My mother will mind Theodore."
Harry's mind whirred. The wizarding world was so damn old-fashioned sometimes. It put so much emphasis on family lines. It was how Harry had wound up stuck at the Dursleys with no serious argument from anyone, was likely why Andromeda had named her nephew guardian of Teddy along with Harry.
It meant that Harry wasn't going to win this argument because it might be imminently logical, but it didn't involve blood. It-
"Hey!" Harry yelped. "Mrs Weasley is related to Teddy. She's a cousin."
"By marriage," Malfoy pointed out with a grimace.
Harry wondered if Malfoy tried to forget the connection as often as possible or if he had just been hoping that Harry, ignorant in so much about the wizarding world, wouldn't know this fact.
Harry decided it was probably all to the best that he didn't understand the family tree well enough to work out how that meant that Molly-and by extension, Ron-were related to Malfoy.
"Still family," Harry pointed out doggedly and pushed for the best concession that he thought he was going to get under the circumstances. "They share the babysitting duties while we're at work."
He thought about saying something about the fact that Teddy would probably have the best chance of turning out halfway normal that way, but he decided it simply insulted everyone, and it was better not to even go there.
Malfoy assessed him with narrowed eyes for a long moment before he finally conceded, "Very well."
Harry tried to suppress a sigh of relief, feeling as though he'd just won a major concession with the Minister for Magic rather than simply arranging one albeit important detail about his personal life.
"It might be easiest for your mum and Mrs Weasley to arrange a schedule that works best for them."
Because Harry could only imagine what would happen if he and Malfoy sat down and tried to come up with one.
"I seriously doubt that would be wise."
Harry suppressed a sigh with an effort. There wasn't a bloody thing that he'd suggested so far that Malfoy thought was a good idea.
"Why not?"
Malfoy was looking at him like he was a moron again.
Seriously. Snape had died at the point that he and Harry might actually have been able to resolve their differences, and Malfoy had stepped into his place with aplomb.
"She killed my mother's sister."
Harry had been expecting Malfoy to bring up the source of the grievance between the Weasley and Malfoy lines, so this response threw him so completely that he simply gaped at the other man.
He swallowed heavily. "Don't you dare go there, Malfoy."
"Don't like to be reminded of the people your side killed?"
"I think the official Malfoy party line is that it's 'our side'," Harry pointed out snidely, infuriated, "and Bellatrix was insane and deserved everything she got."
"She-"
"-killed Teddy's mother," Harry ground out, enunciating each word carefully and keeping a lid on his temper with a monumental effort. "Don't. Go. There. Malfoy."
Malfoy looked as though he wanted to argue but finally seemed to think better of it, and Harry was relieved; he could only imagine what they would think at the Ministry on Monday if the two of them showed up looking as though they'd kicked the crap out of one another.
"I will contact my mother, and you, Mrs Weasley. If available, they shall meet with Teddy tomorrow and make arrangements. Should they be unable to care for him at the requisite times, we will have to look to alternate care-givers."
Harry was willing to bribe Molly with anything to get this settled, and he could only assume that Malfoy would be exercising similar effort over his mother; there was no way that he'd leave Teddy just to a Weasley now.
"My mother will have to be given permission to come here," Malfoy added sharply.
"Of course," Harry agreed quickly, not wanting to get into another argument immediately following the resolution of the last one.
He knew that it grated on Malfoy's sensibilities that Harry was the secret keeper for Grimmauld Place.
Harry was willing to accept pretty much any permutation of babysitting locations just to know that Teddy was going to be safe and well cared for while he was at work.
"When will you find time out of the busy Potter schedule to allow her entrance into the house?"
Ah. Apparently Harry had missed yet another social cue. There probably was something to be said for having Narcissa and Molly spend time with Teddy. Harry wanted the little boy to be happy, but it would be awesome if he rarely felt as out of his depth as Harry so often did.
"If they're both available for ten o'clock tomorrow morning, I could meet your mother at Malfoy Manor."
Harry hoped that that was the socially acceptable way to do it; surely that was more polite than telling her to show up in the street and wait for Harry to go out and get her?
Malfoy was looking at Harry with yet one more look that Harry couldn't decipher.
"I could meet her at the gates," Harry hurried on. "Whatever's most convenient for your mother."
There was still that strange look on Malfoy's face, but then the man inclined his head.
"Potter."
And off he went. Harry scrubbed his hand through his hair and sank down into a chair at the kitchen table.
Idly, he wondered why it was that they always had their arguments on their feet. Were they truly both worried that they were going to need to go for their wands?
Even Harry found this embarrassing. He'd been an Auror for almost a year now. He was twenty-one years old. Surely he could act like an adult.
He drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Neither of them had asked for this. Neither of them had expected this. It wasn't easy for either of them, but it was true that they were staying at Grimmauld Place, and that meant that Malfoy was already at a disadvantage.
Harry needed to work on being the better man here.
He needed to talk to Hermione.
"Here is tea for Master Harry."
Harry lifted his head and summoned a wan smile for the house-elf.
"Thanks, Kreacher. I could definitely use it."
If Harry wanted proof that it was possible for people to change, he need look no further. He doubted that the elf would ever be exactly fond of Harry, certainly not the way that Dobby had been, but his civility and willingness to serve had increased so markedly over the last four years that he truly was almost unrecognizable from the elf that Harry had met when Sirius had first volunteered Grimmauld Place for the Order. Even if the elf was still thinking half his old thoughts, the fact that he did it silently rather than audibly was stupendous.
Malfoy living here had only increased the elf's goodwill, and Harry would take every small mercy that he could scrabble together. Kreacher spent a lot of time at Hogwarts now, as Harry preferred that he have the company of other elves than continue to rattle around here mostly alone. He'd been checking in on Harry more frequently for the last three weeks.
Three weeks ago, his life had been normal. Hell, the fact that he could consider any aspect of his life normal by contrast to what was going on now told him just how fucked up the current situation was.
"Is Master Harry needing anything else?"
"No, I'm good. You'll make sure Malfoy has everything he needs?"
"Of course, Master Harry."
Kreacher looked a little affronted that Harry would suggest that he wouldn't take care of the Malfoy scion. Harry kept his mouth shut.
This whole thing was exhausting; he was looking forward to going back to work only in the hope that he'd get back into a routine that didn't leave him dead on his feet by eight o'clock in the evening.
And when you could say that about your job as an Auror compared to your personal life, you were in deep trouble.
Harry took a fortifying gulp of tea and then dragged himself to his feet. He'd better talk to Molly right away. He couldn't imagine her saying no, but if there was one thing he'd learnt recently it was that life could surprise the hell out of you.
~*~
Tea at Malfoy Manor was yet one more experience that Harry had never expected to have. Well, having a cup of tea, as Narcissa had explained, because it was far too early and not elaborate enough to be Tea.
Harry had heard the capital. Or he may have been distracting himself with adding capitals to words that might not need them because he was Having Tea At Malfoy Manor.
Narcissa-as she had insisted Harry call her-had thought that it would get them off to a good start, and Harry hadn't had the heart to refuse. He could only imagine what Malfoy would have had to say, and how did you explain to someone that a cup of tea couldn't possibly ever counterbalance the fact that the first and only time you had been here up to this point one of your best friends had been tortured, your hostess's sister had killed a friend, and your hostess's son….
And your hostess's son had lied and saved Harry's life.
Draco Malfoy made absolutely no sense to Harry. This hadn't really mattered when they had basically ignored one another following the war. It was another matter entirely when they were living together and trying to raise a child.
Malfoy was at Grimmauld Place minding Teddy while Harry retrieved Narcissa, and while part of Harry was relieved about this fact, the rest of him thought that as inexplicable as he was, the Malfoy Harry was living with might actually have been helpful in this situation.
Still, though, it looked as though Narcissa had been trying not to overwhelm him. They were in a reasonably small room, they were sitting at a reasonably small table, and Lucius Malfoy was nowhere in evidence. There was even tea and cakes. All a vast improvement from last time.
"I know this cannot be easy for you, Harry."
Had she always been capable of sounding this sympathetic, or had she practiced since the War? Harry couldn't really know, he supposed, given how little he had interacted with her. And if he was going to survive any of this, he needed to leave his prejudices behind.
Heartfelt agreement wouldn't exactly be diplomatic, though, so Harry settled for a very firm, "I want what's best for Teddy."
"And that is what has brought you here today."
Harry nodded, feeling this was safest, and took a sip of his tea. It was very good.
"That is what has brought us all here," Narcissa continued smoothly, "and a unifying desire, as you have cause to know, can make the miraculous possible."
Harry drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. That had sounded … almost Dumbledore-ish. They had all agreed to take care of Teddy. Harry didn't understand why everyone had agreed, but maybe that wasn't important. Maybe he should concentrate on the bits that he could understand.
So he summoned a smile for Narcissa and took another sip of his tea to cover how out-of-his-depth he felt.
Narcissa continued, probably well aware that Harry was altogether uncomfortable-or maybe just figuring that he had no conversation skills to speak of. Harry couldn't imagine that anything that Malfoy had to say about him had been complimentary.
"This is not to say that this process is painless or necessarily pleasant. Inviting us into your home is-"
"-something I'm totally willing to do," Harry jumped in.
His interruption was rude, probably, and not something that happened to her very often if her slightly shocked look was something to go by, but given how Malfoy had reacted, he wanted to make clear with Narcissa from the beginning that he was okay with it all.
The look she gave him now was a slightly reproving one, the sort that McGonagall had given him that had always made him feel like an idiot.
"Your willingness to do what is required is not in question."
Harry opened his mouth again but stopped between a sudden realisation that he had no idea how he best wanted to protest that and the reproving look that he was once again getting from Narcissa.
"This does not make it pleasant; we would like to minimize the risks that you feel you are taking."
There didn't seem to be anything sensible to say to that comment, either, and he raised his teacup to cover his silence.
"I am willing to Vow your safety and the integrity of your home."
Harry choked on his tea and managed to spray it all over himself and the table, putting down the cup with a sharp clatter as he tried to swipe the hot liquid off of his exposed skin while spluttering and trying desperately to continue breathing.
Narcissa's eyes had widened, but she had otherwise remained remarkably composed.
"May I?"
He looked at her in confusion and saw her reach for her wand. He wondered if someone who'd always been on this side of the War would have thought to ask first.
Cautiously, he nodded, and a moment later, the liquid had been Vanished and a glass of water sat at Harry's elbow so that he could clear his throat.
"Thank you," he croaked out as he gratefully gulped down the water.
She inclined her head, seeming especially regal in that moment, and making her suggestion all the more bizarre.
"Why would you offer to do that?" Harry couldn't help but demand incredulously.
"It's your home," Narcissa said with quiet dignity.
"It's Teddy's home," Harry corrected. "And we're asking you to come take care of Teddy."
"Is that what you're doing?"
For a stunned, altogether breath-taking moment, Narcissa reminded Harry of Sirius so much that it hurt. He was used to thinking of her as a Malfoy and all … strict and stuck up and stuff. But the tone of that question had been the slightest bit mischievous, and he knew that it was exactly how his godfather would have said it.
He swallowed. There was really no way that she was ever going to believe that he had suggested her as a care-giver, and he tried to think of an argument that would settle this once and for all and not result in Malfoy killing him when he got home.
"Do you promise to take care of Teddy to the best of your abilities? To care for him as you have cared for your son?"
"I do."
He met her gaze squarely. His voice was absolutely certain. "Then we have nothing more to talk about. My home is located at number 12 Grimmauld Place."
~*~
"Hawwy!"
Harry caught the blur of motion and swung him up into Harry's arms.
"Hey, there, Teddy Bear, how's it going?"
Teddy's small arms wrapped around Harry's neck like a vine. "S'good. Glad you're here!"
Teddy pulled back enough to beam at him, all big brown eyes and messy hair. Harry wondered how the little boy could possibly have inherited Harry's impossible hair when they weren't even related, but he supposed that would be a mystery for the ages.
Looking past Teddy to the kitchen where Molly and Malfoy had just risen from the table, Harry couldn't really blame the little boy. From the look of it, they had been having tea, the British solution to everything.
He had no idea if Teddy had actually picked up on any of the tension, but he'd spent more time with Harry when Andromeda was alive than he had with anyone else who was here, and he tended to be reassured when Harry was with him.
"I'm glad to be back," he told the little boy truthfully. He might not be so sure how this meeting was going to go, but he was quite certain that he didn't want to spend any more time at Malfoy Manor than he absolutely had to.
He doubted that Lucius was going to want to stay out of the way forever, and Harry still thought it would be better if they encountered one another as little as possible right now.
He carried Teddy back to the table, receiving a hug from Molly as he passed her and then sitting Teddy back down in his chair before turning back to see the three other adults in the room all standing there.
He really hoped that this wasn't going to devolve into a fight. Surely, everyone could behave better than that in front of Teddy?
"Potter's manners are somewhat lacking, Mother," Malfoy pointed out dryly. "Won't you sit down?"
He gestured to a chair, and Harry suppressed a sigh with an effort. He'd gone to get her, he'd told her where his home was. How was he supposed to know that if he didn't also invite her to sit down at the kitchen table, Malfoy would look at him as though he'd deliberately insulted her?
Harry smiled hopefully at everyone.
"Yeah, um, how about you all sit down, and we can have tea and get all the introductions done and stuff?"
Oh, yeah. Malfoy was staring at him as though he was a stupid first year.
Narcissa was smiling faintly, though.
"Tea is efficacious in numerous awkward situations, wouldn't you say, Harry?"
Harry found his lips tipping up into an answering smile, mind boggling a bit about the fact that Narcissa Malfoy was trying to put him at ease.
On the other hand, he supposed that that was kind of the epitome of a good host, and while Harry was technically the host here, he was pretty sure that the good breeding kicked in even when you were at someone else's house.
Harry sat down next to Teddy and received a death glare from Malfoy-who hadn't sat down yet, Harry realized, but was pulling out a chair for his mother.
Shit.
Harry wasn't going to make it through ten minutes with the Malfoys.
He sprang up again, but Molly just waved him back to his chair when he tried to pull hers back.
He was probably blushing red as a tomato and looked like a complete idiot. But really, what was the point of it all? Weren't they capable of pulling out their own chairs? He was pretty sure that Hermione would punch him in the face if he started acting like she wasn't capable of doing stuff on her own.
"It's all right, Harry, dear. I know you weren't raised that way," Molly said kindly as she sat down.
Harry suppressed a frown with an effort. Not having learnt something at the Dursley's had always struck him as one of the better reasons to pick it up later in life. But he'd stayed with the Weasleys on multiple occasions. He knew full well that they didn't act like this normally. Of course, he didn't normally see Weasleys entertaining Malfoys or vice versa, so this was probably company manners.
At least there weren't any rogue house-elves around to destroy the beautiful pudding. In fact, there wasn't pudding at all, because it was just mid-morning, and-
"Kreacher is bringing tea for everyone, Master Harry. He is-"
Harry turned in confusion as the house-elf cut off abruptly, and he frowned sharply at the utterly cowed, servile pose that the elderly elf had taken, hunched in on himself as though he expected to be punished, as though-as though he were in the presence of a master who was going to hurt him.
With a curiously detached part of himself Harry actually felt the blood draining out of his face. He'd thought he'd known what he was doing inviting the woman here, but maybe he hadn't thought it through nearly as well as he should have.
He stumbled to his feet, chair rocking back inelegantly, all eyes drawn to him.
"Kreacher, could you give everyone their tea and then go see how Winky is doing at Hogwarts, please? Excuse me, everyone. I, uh, need to-" No excuses sprang to his frantically reeling mind. "-go now. Enjoy your tea."
He Apparated just as the babble of voices started, mind preserving the look of utter disdain on Malfoy's face, the worry on Molly's, the confusion on Teddy's, and the pained comprehension on Narcissa's.
Harry sank down to the ground, pulled his knees up to his chest, and practiced his deep breathing.
Okay. There was no need to panic. He hadn't cursed anyone or said anything that he was going to regret, so that was good. It wasn't like he hadn't known what had happened to Sirius before this, and it wasn't as though this moment of him being an idiot was going to change any of that.
He knew who had killed Sirius literally, knew all about why the man had been there, had nearly got all his friends killed, and had already destroyed someone's office over the debacle.
He was twenty-one years old and an Auror. He'd agreed to take care of Teddy, and while he hadn't known exactly what that would entail, he'd known that it wasn't always going to be easy.
So it was going to be harder to take care of Teddy when Malfoy wouldn't ever talk to him again. Harry had been through "harder" before, and he was quite sure that he was going to have to live through it again.
He missed Remus and Sirius, missed the people who would sympathise with him right now. There were people he could talk to, of course, but it wasn't the same. Ron would do nothing but insult the Malfoys, and while part of Harry was sure that that would make him feel better, it would hardly help his home life.
Hermione would let him vent and probably help him be practical about the whole thing, which he definitely needed to do, but since he knew that already, he wasn't so sure that it would help. And he didn't want to-These weren't happy memories for any of them, and he hated to bring up the War and make other people dwell on it when he could avoid it. So many people had lost so much, and it was surely better if they could all move on without Harry sobbing drama all over them.
Sirius had gone through the Veil years ago, and Harry couldn't let the past control him.
He had the feeling that he was going to be repeating that to himself a lot over the next little while.
He rose to his feet, brushing the dirt and grass off his trousers. He could only imagine what sort of etiquette rules he'd broken when it came to Disapparating in his guests' faces like that.
Oh, well.
He brushed a hand across the gravestone in front of him.
"Sorry I'm so scattered today, Mum, Dad. I'll try to come back and make more sense later."
He Apparated to the front step and headed in the normal way, figuring that that had to be more polite than anything else that he had done this morning.
Nothing in life seemed to have prepared him for spending a lot of time with Malfoys, and at this point, he simply needed to accept the necessity and figure out how to make it work.
So far, he wasn't doing very well.
He found that they'd all moved to the library. Molly and Teddy were on the floor playing with some blocks. They were much cooler than Muggle blocks, changing colours and sealing together as they were placed so that you could actually build structures that were solid.
The two Malfoys had been sitting in the two armchairs next to the fire watching the play on the floor, but when Harry sheepishly slunk into the room, Narcissa immediately rose and came over to him.
This was a sharp contrast to her son, who was glaring at Harry again.
"I'm sorry," Harry apologized as soon as Narcissa was within range. "That wasn't very good manners."
"To the contrary. While you may have been a little … abrupt, what would you have done had you stayed?"
Harry sighed. "I thought I'd give making a good impression a try, since I've been doing so badly so far, but it doesn't seem to be working very well."
Narcissa patted his arm. "Give it time, Harry."
Across the room, Malfoy looked almost as stunned as Harry was by the contact.
Harry appreciated the vote of confidence from someone, though. In some ways, all they had was time-about thirteen more years until Teddy graduated from Hogwarts-only the longer it took to get everything settled, the more disconcerting it would be for Teddy.
The poor boy's life had been practically nothing but upheaval, and Harry really didn't want to be responsible for any more.
"Thank you for doing this," he blurted out.
She looked at him curiously.
"I mean, this probably isn't what you thought you'd be doing right now, and Malfoy and I can't do it on our own, and you didn't have to say yes, so just … thanks. You keep saying it can't be easy for me, but it can't be easy for you, either."
She smiled at him again, and Harry realised why people actually liked the Malfoys. They were bloody charming when they wanted to be, when they … liked you?
"I am happy to help, Harry. Perhaps if you have a moment while Teddy is otherwise occupied, we could speak with your house-elf in the kitchen?"
Oh, yeah, like Harry wanted to do that.
But it was a very logical suggestion, and Harry found himself escorting Narcissa down the corridor to the kitchen.
"You have made considerable changes to the house."
Harry looked at her in surprise.
"I have not been in many years, but I do recall the … gloom," she said delicately.
Harry snorted and said without thought, "I wanted the Bitch off the wall."
He flushed as soon as he realised what he'd said in front of Narcissa Malfoy, of all people, but her lips had tipped up faintly. Improbably enough, she seemed to be amused. He was reminded of Sirius again, and swallowed, wondering if that was going to be happening a lot more frequently now.
Harry cleared his throat. "Turns out I had to take the entire wall down for that, and then it seemed like I might as well fix up everything I wanted fixed."
"A steadfast resolution. I believe it is more suited to raising a child now."
Harry rather thought so.
They reached the kitchen, and Harry summoned Kreacher and then watched Narcissa demonstrate to him that she would have no problem taking care of small children. She did her best to clarify that she was not his master and that she was to have no power over him.
Harry decided that he'd maybe suggest the elf spend even more time at Hogwarts, but it still seemed … promising. Harry remembered how Sirius had treated Kreacher and hoped that, for once, he was making the very right choice, and no one he cared about was going to suffer as a result.
~*~
Monday morning meetings with Hermione had been a regular occurrence for over a year, ever since the Monday morning following her cataclysmic split with Ron. She'd progressed well past canaries of doom at this point, after all, and Harry had wanted to make sure she wasn't headed for Azkaban.
Thankfully, nothing as life-altering had occurred since, but he had maintained the habit, and since she always made time no matter how busy she was, he was pretty sure she appreciated it, too.
It helped ensure that they stayed connected; it was hard to miss Ron, even though they were not partnered in the Auror Department. While pretty much everyone who wasn't Ron or Lavender took Hermione's side, they had too many friends in common for it to be altogether comfortable, and Hermione stood a good chance of disappearing into the Department of Mysteries and never being seen from again if Harry didn't keep a close eye on her.
"Welcome back," Hermione said warmly, rising from her desk-which was piled ridiculously high with books-to come give him a hug and a kiss. "How are you doing?"
He really wasn't sure how to answer her.
"I'd say it's the most insane thing that's ever happened to me. That's what it feels like at the moment, anyway."
She laughed a little. "Oh, Harry. That bad?"
"You try living with Malfoy and raising a three year old."
She wrinkled her nose. "Pass, if you please. I thought you two were getting on all right?"
He made a face. "Otherwise known as ignoring one another, 'Mione. Now we live together, and we're supposed to be making joint decisions as we take care of a kid."
"How's that going?"
"Molly and Narcissa are taking care of Teddy while we're at work."
Her eyebrows rose.
"Joint decisions," he reminded her. "And I seem to be getting on better with Narcissa than with Malfoy, and it's just … weird," he finished lamely.
She laughed again but said soothingly, "You're doing something you've never done before. It's bound to be a little strange."
They both knew that wasn't why this was weird, but he appreciated the effort and summoned a smile for her from somewhere.
"How can I help?" she asked.
"I need to add Malfoy Manor onto the Floo Network at Grimmauld Place."
"Last I checked, Aurors could do that."
"Thought it might raise fewer questions if you did it."
Her lips tightened, as they always did when Ron was brought up, even obliquely, but then she softened. "Of course."
"And is there, uh, anything special that I need to do if I'm sharing the Secret on paper?"
Her eyebrows rose towards her hairline. "You're still utter crap at research, aren't you?"
He grinned at her. "You're still the best source out there, especially now; all you do is research."
Her look was arch. "You mean all I can admit to you that I do is research."
He laughed. "All right, Secret Agent Woman. Answering my question?"
"You're sharing the Secret. That's all that matters."
He nodded his understanding and cleared his throat. "So, how's the research coming?"
She laughed again but allowed him to change the subject, and Harry reflected that he had the best friends in the world.
He'd defeated the bloody Dark Lord with their help. This had to be easy by comparison, right?