Inauguration Day
Betty came over around 10 am. The TV was background noise as we sat on the couch schmoozing, a plate of kalamata olives, dolmades, cherry peppers, fresh mushrooms, artichoke hearts, and a really interesting cheddar cheese in front of us.
Every once in a while, we had to break from the conversation to comment on something happening on TV - a celebrity we recognized, Spike Lee's very sensible hat, a funny camera angle (we decided the camera people were bored, doing closeups of the reflections inside tubas, etc.)
Every once in a while, I was shaken out of my casual levity by a camera shot that drove home the monstrous scale of the event taking place. I was overwhelmed by both the crowd as a single entity, and the power pouring forth from each individual, each set of shining eyes, each single face ablaze with hope and pride and rapturous faith.
Around 11:15 I broke out a bottle of Chilean Shiraz, came downstairs with two glasses. "Can we drink wine at eleven o'clock in the morning? YES, WE CAN!!"
As the politicians with their families began their formal trek to their seats for the spectacle, I was hit by a powerful sense of presence in the moment. I wasn't alive when JFK was shot. I didn't hear Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I Have A Dream" speech. I was in utero during the Eagle's lunar landing. There have been, of course, a few such moments by which I have been touched, even irrevocably shaped - surely this was one, and I was right in the middle of it. I knew with complete clarity that I would always remember every single thing about that very second, down to the trickle of the fish tank and the clothes I was wearing.
I turned to Betty with tears in my eyes and said "You know, I've never really been Proud of my country. And I've always wanted to be."
I am proud of things my country has done. I am surely proud of the things her people are willing to do for her. I'm deeply grateful for much. But I've also always felt that if I were to go abroad, if I told anyone I was an American, I'd have to follow that up with some kind of apology. There is so much of our history, both distant and recent, which makes me feel ashamed.
I don't remember ever feeling so proud of a leader. I certainly don't think I have ever believed that any of them were capable of Real Change. The idea of our whole beautiful country, with all her unlimited potential, working as one toward a better world...gods...if any nation can do it, surely this one.
In the speech itself, the things that inspired me most were the salutes to the past. How far we have come, from so many different places, what a dreamy, idealistic, determined people we are. What can we not accomplished when we work as one?
I most desperately want to stand up with my fellow citizens and do my best to Be All We Can Be. Even if all he is able to actually accomplish in four years is the awakening of our sense of Possibility, he has won. Hope is powerful. I'm infused by a patriotism I've never experienced before.
I'm so happy to be Proud to be an American.