unsent letters: the first thursday edition
Dear gay cliche behind the counter at the queer little coffee shop,
Shocking as it may seem to you, I do not actually need a babysitter to "take me" places. If I had such a person, they would be with me, which they were not.
Your latte wasn't that great either. I do not like my vanilla coffee latte to have overtones of TEA.
<3
phin
Dear Seattle Art Museum,
Considering you only just renovated, it would have been nice to had a straightforward way to get to and from the gift shop from the galleries, rather than taking what is only two steps up from a freight elevator and following ridiculously byzantine directions. Also you need more than eight audio tour headsets, considering you're an extremely popular tourist attraction. Nice concern for accessibility.
<3
phin
dear guy that worked in the museum gift shop.
it's all very cute that you have a special two dollar bill advertising your exhibit. If I run into any trouble using that fucking thing in a store I'm coming back and taking it out of your hide.
<3
phin
dear bus driving bitch on the 43,
I'm sorry that it was INCONVENIENT that I asked you to secure my wheelchair at the back instead of taking the "easy" way out and just looping the belts over the armrest. I just don't want to, you know, get thrown or tipped over if you make a sudden stop (which, considering your driving, was actually very possible - lay off the clutch, okay? it's bad enough that the shocks on these buses are going, they don't need help). Don't roll your fucking eyes at me.
And I'm sorry it's INCONVENIENT for you to stop and let me off at, you know, my stop. I'll get right on fixing that as soon as you take that fucking steel spike out of your ass.
<3
phin
dear oral surgeon,
stop being out of the office and answer your goddamn phone? i'm really getting sick of your answering service. I'm sorry that it's INCONVENIENT for you to, you know, WORK. too bad.
<3
phin
dear tallin
I found a twenty on the floor by your desk. I'm assuming it's yours, but I'm taking care of it now. If it isn't yours, well, score.
for real <3
me
wasn't spectacularly impressed with about half of the exhibits, but have come to the conclusion that this is because I don't really care for modern art. also too many yuppie mothers with their immaculately dressed perfect children. on the other hand admission was free, so it was worth about what I paid for it. I was intending to go to the asian art museum in Volunteer park but I turned the wrong way. I think that'll be more consistently in line with my interests. also next time i go downtown I'm only doing the 4th floor which is mostly traditional/ancient art. i dunno, maybe i'm old or something. certainly i feel that way.
Shocking as it may seem to you, I do not actually need a babysitter to "take me" places. If I had such a person, they would be with me, which they were not.
Your latte wasn't that great either. I do not like my vanilla coffee latte to have overtones of TEA.
<3
phin
Dear Seattle Art Museum,
Considering you only just renovated, it would have been nice to had a straightforward way to get to and from the gift shop from the galleries, rather than taking what is only two steps up from a freight elevator and following ridiculously byzantine directions. Also you need more than eight audio tour headsets, considering you're an extremely popular tourist attraction. Nice concern for accessibility.
<3
phin
dear guy that worked in the museum gift shop.
it's all very cute that you have a special two dollar bill advertising your exhibit. If I run into any trouble using that fucking thing in a store I'm coming back and taking it out of your hide.
<3
phin
dear bus driving bitch on the 43,
I'm sorry that it was INCONVENIENT that I asked you to secure my wheelchair at the back instead of taking the "easy" way out and just looping the belts over the armrest. I just don't want to, you know, get thrown or tipped over if you make a sudden stop (which, considering your driving, was actually very possible - lay off the clutch, okay? it's bad enough that the shocks on these buses are going, they don't need help). Don't roll your fucking eyes at me.
And I'm sorry it's INCONVENIENT for you to stop and let me off at, you know, my stop. I'll get right on fixing that as soon as you take that fucking steel spike out of your ass.
<3
phin
dear oral surgeon,
stop being out of the office and answer your goddamn phone? i'm really getting sick of your answering service. I'm sorry that it's INCONVENIENT for you to, you know, WORK. too bad.
<3
phin
dear tallin
I found a twenty on the floor by your desk. I'm assuming it's yours, but I'm taking care of it now. If it isn't yours, well, score.
for real <3
me
wasn't spectacularly impressed with about half of the exhibits, but have come to the conclusion that this is because I don't really care for modern art. also too many yuppie mothers with their immaculately dressed perfect children. on the other hand admission was free, so it was worth about what I paid for it. I was intending to go to the asian art museum in Volunteer park but I turned the wrong way. I think that'll be more consistently in line with my interests. also next time i go downtown I'm only doing the 4th floor which is mostly traditional/ancient art. i dunno, maybe i'm old or something. certainly i feel that way.