Tak' the high road
The most recent Friday Five are about doing and being one's best. I'm not sure anything means anything anymore, but I suppose "trying hard" would be my M.O. even on the deck of the Titanic, so here are some answers.
1. Who inspires you to be your best self?
My sons and grandsons. In the case of my sons, it's because I am still trying to set a good example for them. In the case of the grands (who I don't think look to me as their primary role model), I'm just trying to make the world they'll inherit ever-so-slightly less awful.
Not that I always succeed in being my best self, alas.
2. When has taking the high road proved to be the best path?
This is tricky. I mean, I experience myself as usually trying to take the high road (at a minimum, this means trying not to complain about small stuff even when it's justified, or embarrass people even when they're totally in the wrong, or retaliate when I am wronged; all while trying to be kind in all circumstances), and my relationship with the world is pretty good. That means, at least for me, that there seems to be a correlation between the high road and the good life. Of course, whenever I do succeed in taking the high road, it necessarily means that any possible universe in which I took a lower road is not instantiated, and thus I cannot compare the results. So I think one just has to decide that the high road IS the better path, by definition, no matter how things turn out.
I can give you a case of my not taking the highest possible road and regretting it because of how things turned out. With 20-20 hindsight, I now wish I'd been able to put on enough of a game face after the Man's desertion to keep being his cheerleader for the boys. It was something I'd always considered part of my job when we were married -- as the lead parent, I got a lot of the credit and a lot of the love, and I wanted to make sure my sons appreciated their less flashy dad, as well. But after he left, one of the things I allowed my poor, sad self to do was not worry about that. I didn't go out of my way to run him down, but I certainly made no effort to conceal how he'd hurt me, which I now see was as good as talking smack about him (and, okay, there may have been some actual smack-talking in there). Fourteen years have passed, and the boys' relationship with their father has deteriorated -- and that's a genuine shame. Maybe it *wasn't* my job to be the bridge between them anymore, but I'm sorry I didn't at least try a little harder to be consistently upbeat about him to them, as it might have helped. Yes, it would have cost me a lot personally, but that's why they call it the high road, innit?
3. What are some of your favorite comfort foods among things you can prepare yourself?
Pasta. Chicken-and-stuffing casserole. Brownies. Fudge. Cookies. SOUP!
4. What can you do this week to make the world better?
Stop crying about the election results and donate to a group that's going to help immigrants and/or desperate pregnant women get the assistance they need in hostile times.
Also, clean the living room.
5. What can you do this week to take extra special care of yourself?
Eat a little less (I have been eating my feelings about the election, and I feel bloated & yucky).
Also, clean the living room. A tidy environment is a calming environment.
1. Who inspires you to be your best self?
My sons and grandsons. In the case of my sons, it's because I am still trying to set a good example for them. In the case of the grands (who I don't think look to me as their primary role model), I'm just trying to make the world they'll inherit ever-so-slightly less awful.
Not that I always succeed in being my best self, alas.
2. When has taking the high road proved to be the best path?
This is tricky. I mean, I experience myself as usually trying to take the high road (at a minimum, this means trying not to complain about small stuff even when it's justified, or embarrass people even when they're totally in the wrong, or retaliate when I am wronged; all while trying to be kind in all circumstances), and my relationship with the world is pretty good. That means, at least for me, that there seems to be a correlation between the high road and the good life. Of course, whenever I do succeed in taking the high road, it necessarily means that any possible universe in which I took a lower road is not instantiated, and thus I cannot compare the results. So I think one just has to decide that the high road IS the better path, by definition, no matter how things turn out.
I can give you a case of my not taking the highest possible road and regretting it because of how things turned out. With 20-20 hindsight, I now wish I'd been able to put on enough of a game face after the Man's desertion to keep being his cheerleader for the boys. It was something I'd always considered part of my job when we were married -- as the lead parent, I got a lot of the credit and a lot of the love, and I wanted to make sure my sons appreciated their less flashy dad, as well. But after he left, one of the things I allowed my poor, sad self to do was not worry about that. I didn't go out of my way to run him down, but I certainly made no effort to conceal how he'd hurt me, which I now see was as good as talking smack about him (and, okay, there may have been some actual smack-talking in there). Fourteen years have passed, and the boys' relationship with their father has deteriorated -- and that's a genuine shame. Maybe it *wasn't* my job to be the bridge between them anymore, but I'm sorry I didn't at least try a little harder to be consistently upbeat about him to them, as it might have helped. Yes, it would have cost me a lot personally, but that's why they call it the high road, innit?
3. What are some of your favorite comfort foods among things you can prepare yourself?
Pasta. Chicken-and-stuffing casserole. Brownies. Fudge. Cookies. SOUP!
4. What can you do this week to make the world better?
Stop crying about the election results and donate to a group that's going to help immigrants and/or desperate pregnant women get the assistance they need in hostile times.
Also, clean the living room.
5. What can you do this week to take extra special care of yourself?
Eat a little less (I have been eating my feelings about the election, and I feel bloated & yucky).
Also, clean the living room. A tidy environment is a calming environment.