I wasn't born with enough middle fingers
In response to devereux1880's post about junk e-mail, I thought I'd share this with you all. I wrote it three years ago and for some reason have never posted it before, so here it finally is:
2003-04-17 - 13:39 p.m.
Every FUCKING day I'm forced to wake up to this CRAP. I mean, have you ever actually LOOKED at some of the subject lines? Let's see what I'm being infiltrated with today, shall we?
1) "hi kgs"
I'm not kgs, nor do I know who kgs is or what kgs stands for. Let's open it shall we? Oh, it's blank. No content. No indication as to where it came from. Erm, no point?
2) "Get more from your mobile and win £10,000!"
My mobile what? Assuming this is referring to my phone, it already makes phone calls, thank you very much. What "more" would I want from it?
3) "Haven't you wanted to pee on a girl?"
No.
4) "pussies with no hair"
Wouldn't they get sunstroke? The RSPCA might want to have a look into this one!
5) "Don't waste your money on dates"
What does this person have against dates then? Do they work for an apple or a banana firm? Fruitist alert!
6) "Tired Of The Credit Card Treadmill?"
No, just tired of my e-mail account being clogged up with your pointless rubbish.
7) "FREE CHILD PORNO"
Okay, I'm not even going to joke about this one. I'll leave it to the relevant police department.
8) "Play this cool animation and win a clubber holiday!"
Why, so I can be jetted off to some horrible island full of ecstasy-filled wankers and be subjected to some of the worst "music" ever made? No ta.
9) "Get a free month with your order"
A free month, eh? Cool! Someone finally figured out how to slow down time! What shall I call my free month? Dectober, maybe?
10) "What are you doing tonight"
Clearing all your unwanted shite out of my inbox, if you must know.
Ahh, off my chest.
P.S. Regarding more current affairs, there's a new Coybito song up on our MySpace called "The Day Before The Revolution". Personally, I don't think we've ever sounded better. Check it out: http://www.myspace.com/coybito
2003-04-17 - 13:39 p.m.
Every FUCKING day I'm forced to wake up to this CRAP. I mean, have you ever actually LOOKED at some of the subject lines? Let's see what I'm being infiltrated with today, shall we?
1) "hi kgs"
I'm not kgs, nor do I know who kgs is or what kgs stands for. Let's open it shall we? Oh, it's blank. No content. No indication as to where it came from. Erm, no point?
2) "Get more from your mobile and win £10,000!"
My mobile what? Assuming this is referring to my phone, it already makes phone calls, thank you very much. What "more" would I want from it?
3) "Haven't you wanted to pee on a girl?"
No.
4) "pussies with no hair"
Wouldn't they get sunstroke? The RSPCA might want to have a look into this one!
5) "Don't waste your money on dates"
What does this person have against dates then? Do they work for an apple or a banana firm? Fruitist alert!
6) "Tired Of The Credit Card Treadmill?"
No, just tired of my e-mail account being clogged up with your pointless rubbish.
7) "FREE CHILD PORNO"
Okay, I'm not even going to joke about this one. I'll leave it to the relevant police department.
8) "Play this cool animation and win a clubber holiday!"
Why, so I can be jetted off to some horrible island full of ecstasy-filled wankers and be subjected to some of the worst "music" ever made? No ta.
9) "Get a free month with your order"
A free month, eh? Cool! Someone finally figured out how to slow down time! What shall I call my free month? Dectober, maybe?
10) "What are you doing tonight"
Clearing all your unwanted shite out of my inbox, if you must know.
Ahh, off my chest.
P.S. Regarding more current affairs, there's a new Coybito song up on our MySpace called "The Day Before The Revolution". Personally, I don't think we've ever sounded better. Check it out: http://www.myspace.com/coybito