SOOOooo, many wal*mart stories that i dont wanna forget, but should.
Tommorow: I am gonna try to remember to take back scarface that i got jason for his brithday last year.
(I accidently bought VHS)
Yesterday: A bunch of hilarious stuff happend.
there are 5 stockmen working, counting me. I leave for lunch, somehow, within the next hour 3 of the remainig stockmen leave before i get back. (the system isnt hard, one guy leaves, he comes back, next guy goes.) So, for like 15 minutes there is only one stockmen working, so that pisses him off, and our boss. SO, when everyone gets back, he calls a meeting for all of us to go to. So we get back there in this little room, waiting for him to come in. It's great. The manager is like 6 foot, 100 pounds overweight, and has a medium length beard and messy brown thinning hair. He barges in the door, throws down something on a table in a disgusted way, and is scowling. Next, he walks in and sits down and just looks at us for maybe 15 seconds. 2 of the regular guys are all nervous and faces turn all red. I just sit there thinking, "hello? say something." But, he was doing that for intimidation factor of the little sheep regular cart pushers,(i think it must be in the psychlolgical warfare section in the walmart handbook, cause the guy does this evertime there is some stupid meeting.) SO, he starts talking about how mad he is and how stupid this is and he is cussing and swearing and cussing some more and protraying all the qualites of why he is a manager at walmart. Then, after he calms down he slowly starts talking about how this isn't gonna happen anymore, and peopel are gonna start getting fired because he is sick of it. but, as he does this he slowly moves his stare from one person to the next to the next to the next, like 15 seconds or so a person. (also musta picekd that up from the handbook.) Him doing this is so amuzing to me taht im not even listening to what he is saying, im just looking at the reation of the people he is staring at. Well, unfortunatly for me, i was the last guy in line that he was staring at, which gave me tiem for my mind to wander and to think fo stuff to do. So in my wisdom i decided to stare directly straight back at him, i could tell it bothered him, cause all the other sheep just get nervous and look away and occasionally glance back. well, i broke down and looked away because it was way to awkward, so he moved on to start his cycle again. THat just gave me enough time to get my courage up for the second round of stare down, so it comes my turn again, and i hold it, and hold it, and hold it, and he stops talking and is just staring at me! well, again, i advert my eyes because a smile was starting to crack on my face..and it was totally not the appropriate time for a smile. again, he goes around for a third round, this time his stares aint so hardcore, he comes to me again, and he glances away and looks back and glances away and looks back while he is talking about yada yada your all gonna get fired. (remember, i went to lunch first, i had no idea what the hell these other idiots were doing.) FINALLY, he stops for a second and reaches in a cabinet and pulls out a green sheet of paper, he says, "ya'll know what this is right?" all of us say NO, so he tells us its an exit interview sheet and if shit like what happend tonight happens again, we will become very familiar with it. and he pauses and hold it out infornt of him, but this time he starts his dramatic pause with me, and our eyes are locked.....but i am determined to hold it, im thinking to myself, this guy is some fucking C average high school student, he works at walmart, fuck him, he aint gonna intimidate me! so i keep it, and hes prolly thinking, "this fucking smartass college kid, thinks hes hot shit, I'll show this little pecker." and we are locked, and its intesne, and the tension in the room is thick due to the ass chewing we just got and all the threats he just laid out, and we stare for an abnormally long time, id swear it was 5 minutes, but i bet it was actually like 20 seconds, but thats still a long time to stare at someone, and what do i do.................i laugh...............it was just a lil laugh, more like a wheez, i just couldnt hold it in. thank god he didt say anything, he just kept going on. but i was waiting for the explsion about "you think this is funny, huh?" but it never happened, never the less, the timing could not have been worse.
Aanyhow, shortly after the meeting i told the other stockmen this over the walkie talkie, "Hey, stockemn, this is stockmen jeremy, im going on my last 15 minutes break, so that means that no one else goes on a break for the next 15 mintues while im on mine, ok? do you guys got this down now?" it was ment as a joke, i wasnt beeing an asshole to them. But, as soon as i stop talking, coming BOOMING over the walkies is the manager, "HEY! THIS ISNT SOMETHING TO BE JOKING AROUND ABOUT, THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS! TREAT IT THAT WAY!!" i didnt reply, figured id pushed enough buttons for one day.
i was in this smartass mood because of events earlier in the day, such as this one. I'm working with this kid, he is 20 and has already had a heart attack (according to him.) hes deusche bag, anyhow, he was talking about a tatoo that he wants, and being an asshole i say to him, "yeah, tatoos are a good investment." and he says "yeah, i know." that was my cue to leave. HERE IS THE PART WHERE I LIE ABOUT WHAT HAPPEND BUT I STILL THINK IT WOULD BE FUNNY IF THIS HAPPENED. then i said, "yeah, i think they appreciate in value the longer you have um, maybe they depreciate, im not sure." and he said, "Im not sure, i just know that i appreciate a nice tatoo when i see it on someone." END OF PART WHERE I LIE.
hahah, real funny jeremy.
I also have an update about the shoe throwing out the window thing. i foudn one greenish brown sock and one whtie sock with the long leg part that old men wear with the double red stripe on top. never a pair, which is weird. But i just expalin it away this way. Ya know how they say, "where there's smoke, theres fire." well i think the same applies to shoes and socks. "wheres theres shoes, theres socks."
Today: a walmart kids grandma died today, thats 3 peoples grandparents dying around me in 2 weeks. crazy. bad things happen in threes.
also, today a lady brought back a picinic table today, she bought it in a box that is like 6 feet long, 4 feet wide, and 6 inches or so tall. She brought it back because she didn't know you had to put it together!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT!!!! R! U! KIDDING! ME!
i dont know what the hell she was thinking, was she gonna water it and expect it to grow? did she think it was infaltable? did she think it was a pop-up? the world will never know.
dang, i guess thats all, i have nothing else to do so i was just gonna keep writing and writing and writing, but im bored of it now. i dont know what im gonna write about when i dont work at walmart any more. Hopefully, i will find a job with one of bobbis bro;s this summer.
(I accidently bought VHS)
Yesterday: A bunch of hilarious stuff happend.
there are 5 stockmen working, counting me. I leave for lunch, somehow, within the next hour 3 of the remainig stockmen leave before i get back. (the system isnt hard, one guy leaves, he comes back, next guy goes.) So, for like 15 minutes there is only one stockmen working, so that pisses him off, and our boss. SO, when everyone gets back, he calls a meeting for all of us to go to. So we get back there in this little room, waiting for him to come in. It's great. The manager is like 6 foot, 100 pounds overweight, and has a medium length beard and messy brown thinning hair. He barges in the door, throws down something on a table in a disgusted way, and is scowling. Next, he walks in and sits down and just looks at us for maybe 15 seconds. 2 of the regular guys are all nervous and faces turn all red. I just sit there thinking, "hello? say something." But, he was doing that for intimidation factor of the little sheep regular cart pushers,(i think it must be in the psychlolgical warfare section in the walmart handbook, cause the guy does this evertime there is some stupid meeting.) SO, he starts talking about how mad he is and how stupid this is and he is cussing and swearing and cussing some more and protraying all the qualites of why he is a manager at walmart. Then, after he calms down he slowly starts talking about how this isn't gonna happen anymore, and peopel are gonna start getting fired because he is sick of it. but, as he does this he slowly moves his stare from one person to the next to the next to the next, like 15 seconds or so a person. (also musta picekd that up from the handbook.) Him doing this is so amuzing to me taht im not even listening to what he is saying, im just looking at the reation of the people he is staring at. Well, unfortunatly for me, i was the last guy in line that he was staring at, which gave me tiem for my mind to wander and to think fo stuff to do. So in my wisdom i decided to stare directly straight back at him, i could tell it bothered him, cause all the other sheep just get nervous and look away and occasionally glance back. well, i broke down and looked away because it was way to awkward, so he moved on to start his cycle again. THat just gave me enough time to get my courage up for the second round of stare down, so it comes my turn again, and i hold it, and hold it, and hold it, and he stops talking and is just staring at me! well, again, i advert my eyes because a smile was starting to crack on my face..and it was totally not the appropriate time for a smile. again, he goes around for a third round, this time his stares aint so hardcore, he comes to me again, and he glances away and looks back and glances away and looks back while he is talking about yada yada your all gonna get fired. (remember, i went to lunch first, i had no idea what the hell these other idiots were doing.) FINALLY, he stops for a second and reaches in a cabinet and pulls out a green sheet of paper, he says, "ya'll know what this is right?" all of us say NO, so he tells us its an exit interview sheet and if shit like what happend tonight happens again, we will become very familiar with it. and he pauses and hold it out infornt of him, but this time he starts his dramatic pause with me, and our eyes are locked.....but i am determined to hold it, im thinking to myself, this guy is some fucking C average high school student, he works at walmart, fuck him, he aint gonna intimidate me! so i keep it, and hes prolly thinking, "this fucking smartass college kid, thinks hes hot shit, I'll show this little pecker." and we are locked, and its intesne, and the tension in the room is thick due to the ass chewing we just got and all the threats he just laid out, and we stare for an abnormally long time, id swear it was 5 minutes, but i bet it was actually like 20 seconds, but thats still a long time to stare at someone, and what do i do.................i laugh...............it was just a lil laugh, more like a wheez, i just couldnt hold it in. thank god he didt say anything, he just kept going on. but i was waiting for the explsion about "you think this is funny, huh?" but it never happened, never the less, the timing could not have been worse.
Aanyhow, shortly after the meeting i told the other stockmen this over the walkie talkie, "Hey, stockemn, this is stockmen jeremy, im going on my last 15 minutes break, so that means that no one else goes on a break for the next 15 mintues while im on mine, ok? do you guys got this down now?" it was ment as a joke, i wasnt beeing an asshole to them. But, as soon as i stop talking, coming BOOMING over the walkies is the manager, "HEY! THIS ISNT SOMETHING TO BE JOKING AROUND ABOUT, THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS! TREAT IT THAT WAY!!" i didnt reply, figured id pushed enough buttons for one day.
i was in this smartass mood because of events earlier in the day, such as this one. I'm working with this kid, he is 20 and has already had a heart attack (according to him.) hes deusche bag, anyhow, he was talking about a tatoo that he wants, and being an asshole i say to him, "yeah, tatoos are a good investment." and he says "yeah, i know." that was my cue to leave. HERE IS THE PART WHERE I LIE ABOUT WHAT HAPPEND BUT I STILL THINK IT WOULD BE FUNNY IF THIS HAPPENED. then i said, "yeah, i think they appreciate in value the longer you have um, maybe they depreciate, im not sure." and he said, "Im not sure, i just know that i appreciate a nice tatoo when i see it on someone." END OF PART WHERE I LIE.
hahah, real funny jeremy.
I also have an update about the shoe throwing out the window thing. i foudn one greenish brown sock and one whtie sock with the long leg part that old men wear with the double red stripe on top. never a pair, which is weird. But i just expalin it away this way. Ya know how they say, "where there's smoke, theres fire." well i think the same applies to shoes and socks. "wheres theres shoes, theres socks."
Today: a walmart kids grandma died today, thats 3 peoples grandparents dying around me in 2 weeks. crazy. bad things happen in threes.
also, today a lady brought back a picinic table today, she bought it in a box that is like 6 feet long, 4 feet wide, and 6 inches or so tall. She brought it back because she didn't know you had to put it together!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT!!!! R! U! KIDDING! ME!
i dont know what the hell she was thinking, was she gonna water it and expect it to grow? did she think it was infaltable? did she think it was a pop-up? the world will never know.
dang, i guess thats all, i have nothing else to do so i was just gonna keep writing and writing and writing, but im bored of it now. i dont know what im gonna write about when i dont work at walmart any more. Hopefully, i will find a job with one of bobbis bro;s this summer.