(no subject)
Title: I Can’t Lose You Again.
Chapter 5
This is the sequel to “Mexico”, ten days after its end.
Disclaimer: the talented Mrs Proulx owns the original story and characters.
Special thanks to my dear beta Carol, Paula and Sam and to Onefreetoroam for the title idea.
Thanks to all of you readers and to those who added their opinion.
Due to a very hard time at work, I hope to add soon next chapter, that need further work and to be betaed, too. This one is shorter, but it’s a family moment.
John Twist behaved so quietly after they took home the horses that for the first time Ennis doubted the reality of Jack’s descriptions of his childhood.
That was the man who had beaten his son? Who had used harsh words against him? Who was cruel to a good wife and mother?
He wanted - more, than that, needed - to talk with Jack about it, but it was hard to find the right time. They were often separated during the days, working in different parts of the ranch. Ennis was determined to earn his stay at the ranch and insisted with Jack to help him and his parents.
Nobody talked about money. Jack was sure his father would pay Ennis for his work.
At dinner they always ate with Jack’s parents in an atmosphere of silence, sometimes interrupted by a brief exchange between Claire and Jack. John and Claire seemed used to the silence; Claire preferred to speak with Ennis when nobody was around and Ennis - being himself a man who liked silence - accepted it too.
Jack noticed that Ennis was always cautious when his father was talking, a subtle change; as if he was readying himself for the next confrontation. Ennis was always braced for something that never happened, because as soon as the dinner was over John Twist said goodbye everybody and went outside to do his evening chores before going straight to bed.
On Friday Claire woke up earlier than usual; she was feeling hot under the covers and decided to leave the bed for the cooler kitchen. It was still dark outside, but somebody else was awake, because there was a soft light downstairs.
Claire found Jack sitting at the kitchen table, with a big envelope in his hand.
He lifted his head when his mother appeared on the threshold.
“Can’t sleep.”
“Me either,” she replied.
“ It’s strange, but I missed this place a lot. Missed you too, Mom.”
Claire remained silent. Her eyes were ready to spill tears but she promised herself that she would remain strong for her son. She had important questions to ask and could not do it crying.
“I believed Texas was good for you.”
“In the end, there were always too many people around, at work, at home, my in laws....you know, Mom, at first I liked the confusion, the voices, the idea of meeting new people at every party the Newsomes gave. I was the rodeo boy, the novelty. Then I got tired of telling the story of my life to people over and over.”
“You always liked to try new things. Remember in high school when you signed up for all the sports programs?”
“That was another me. I was looking for something to do, to be away from here. I ended up with an unplanned child. Now I’ve found what I want, no more searching around.”
“You’re planning to stay?” It was more than a whisper, a hope put into words that Claire was still afraid to imagine.
“Don’t know exactly where, but ‘round here. I need time to think, and Ennis too.”
“Ennis has a family, he told me.”
“He got divorced six months ago, his daughters live in Riverton. Alma left him with nothing but barely enough money for a one-room flat and two horses. But he’s too proud to take charity, he wants to work for us while he’s here.”
“Your father needs the help, but John’s also too proud a man to ask.”
”Ennis will find a way, I know him.”
“You’ve know him since the second summer with the sheep, haven’t you? Before Lureen?”
“Yes, Mom, long before.”
“Jack, I can’t be sure because I never met your wife, only saw pictures of your wedding ceremony, but did you really love her?
“Maybe at first. I tried to imagine how love was.... I was so lonely and she was like a long drink of water for a thirsty man. I was a fool, though. After meeting her father, I should have run away, but she pleaded with me, and Bobby came before I knew it. I bet she did it deliberately, because I never talked seriously about babies with her.”
“You know, I’d like to see him, just once..he’s the only grandson I’ll have.”
Claire looked at Jack with a strange light in her eyes, the way she spoke about the “only grandson” was somehow definitive, irrevocable, a sort of admission that there was no other woman who was meant for Jack.
“The divorce papers say I can have him for three weeks during summer vacation. I hope to bring him up here soon.” Jack sometimes thought about the pain that his parents might have felt at never being able to meet Bobby, their only grandson, but he never had the strength to discuss the matter with Lureen. In Texas, the Twists were considered as not socially acceptable people, not eligible to be invited to a barbeque at the Newsome mansion.
Claire closed her eyes for a moment. It was a long awaited dream that could come true, to have all her family reunited under the same roof. And - in the strange ways only a mother knows - she understood that to have Jack around she must prevent Ennis’ departure.
“We could give Bobby the room near the bathroom, after cleaning and painting it. Get some new furniture. We could change Ennis’ too; he’s sleeping in a small bed now, so uncomfortable. If you like I’ll talk to your father as soon as possible.”
“Thanks a lot, Mom, Ennis would be happy to help and we could surely buy new beds. For him and Bobby.” For the moment it was what Jack was hoping for. The future, like having his own house with Ennis, could wait.
“If my boys are happy I’ll be the luckiest woman in the world.”
“I love you, Mom,” Jack said, standing up to place a kiss on the top of Claire’s head, smelling her familiar scent.
Chapter 5
This is the sequel to “Mexico”, ten days after its end.
Disclaimer: the talented Mrs Proulx owns the original story and characters.
Special thanks to my dear beta Carol, Paula and Sam and to Onefreetoroam for the title idea.
Thanks to all of you readers and to those who added their opinion.
Due to a very hard time at work, I hope to add soon next chapter, that need further work and to be betaed, too. This one is shorter, but it’s a family moment.
John Twist behaved so quietly after they took home the horses that for the first time Ennis doubted the reality of Jack’s descriptions of his childhood.
That was the man who had beaten his son? Who had used harsh words against him? Who was cruel to a good wife and mother?
He wanted - more, than that, needed - to talk with Jack about it, but it was hard to find the right time. They were often separated during the days, working in different parts of the ranch. Ennis was determined to earn his stay at the ranch and insisted with Jack to help him and his parents.
Nobody talked about money. Jack was sure his father would pay Ennis for his work.
At dinner they always ate with Jack’s parents in an atmosphere of silence, sometimes interrupted by a brief exchange between Claire and Jack. John and Claire seemed used to the silence; Claire preferred to speak with Ennis when nobody was around and Ennis - being himself a man who liked silence - accepted it too.
Jack noticed that Ennis was always cautious when his father was talking, a subtle change; as if he was readying himself for the next confrontation. Ennis was always braced for something that never happened, because as soon as the dinner was over John Twist said goodbye everybody and went outside to do his evening chores before going straight to bed.
On Friday Claire woke up earlier than usual; she was feeling hot under the covers and decided to leave the bed for the cooler kitchen. It was still dark outside, but somebody else was awake, because there was a soft light downstairs.
Claire found Jack sitting at the kitchen table, with a big envelope in his hand.
He lifted his head when his mother appeared on the threshold.
“Can’t sleep.”
“Me either,” she replied.
“ It’s strange, but I missed this place a lot. Missed you too, Mom.”
Claire remained silent. Her eyes were ready to spill tears but she promised herself that she would remain strong for her son. She had important questions to ask and could not do it crying.
“I believed Texas was good for you.”
“In the end, there were always too many people around, at work, at home, my in laws....you know, Mom, at first I liked the confusion, the voices, the idea of meeting new people at every party the Newsomes gave. I was the rodeo boy, the novelty. Then I got tired of telling the story of my life to people over and over.”
“You always liked to try new things. Remember in high school when you signed up for all the sports programs?”
“That was another me. I was looking for something to do, to be away from here. I ended up with an unplanned child. Now I’ve found what I want, no more searching around.”
“You’re planning to stay?” It was more than a whisper, a hope put into words that Claire was still afraid to imagine.
“Don’t know exactly where, but ‘round here. I need time to think, and Ennis too.”
“Ennis has a family, he told me.”
“He got divorced six months ago, his daughters live in Riverton. Alma left him with nothing but barely enough money for a one-room flat and two horses. But he’s too proud to take charity, he wants to work for us while he’s here.”
“Your father needs the help, but John’s also too proud a man to ask.”
”Ennis will find a way, I know him.”
“You’ve know him since the second summer with the sheep, haven’t you? Before Lureen?”
“Yes, Mom, long before.”
“Jack, I can’t be sure because I never met your wife, only saw pictures of your wedding ceremony, but did you really love her?
“Maybe at first. I tried to imagine how love was.... I was so lonely and she was like a long drink of water for a thirsty man. I was a fool, though. After meeting her father, I should have run away, but she pleaded with me, and Bobby came before I knew it. I bet she did it deliberately, because I never talked seriously about babies with her.”
“You know, I’d like to see him, just once..he’s the only grandson I’ll have.”
Claire looked at Jack with a strange light in her eyes, the way she spoke about the “only grandson” was somehow definitive, irrevocable, a sort of admission that there was no other woman who was meant for Jack.
“The divorce papers say I can have him for three weeks during summer vacation. I hope to bring him up here soon.” Jack sometimes thought about the pain that his parents might have felt at never being able to meet Bobby, their only grandson, but he never had the strength to discuss the matter with Lureen. In Texas, the Twists were considered as not socially acceptable people, not eligible to be invited to a barbeque at the Newsome mansion.
Claire closed her eyes for a moment. It was a long awaited dream that could come true, to have all her family reunited under the same roof. And - in the strange ways only a mother knows - she understood that to have Jack around she must prevent Ennis’ departure.
“We could give Bobby the room near the bathroom, after cleaning and painting it. Get some new furniture. We could change Ennis’ too; he’s sleeping in a small bed now, so uncomfortable. If you like I’ll talk to your father as soon as possible.”
“Thanks a lot, Mom, Ennis would be happy to help and we could surely buy new beds. For him and Bobby.” For the moment it was what Jack was hoping for. The future, like having his own house with Ennis, could wait.
“If my boys are happy I’ll be the luckiest woman in the world.”
“I love you, Mom,” Jack said, standing up to place a kiss on the top of Claire’s head, smelling her familiar scent.