What could have been . . . but shouldn't
Yesterday I came home from work, ate dinner and fell asleep around 7pm . . . woke up at 5am . . . went back to sleep about 6:30am . . . woke up at 12pm. Between those times of slumber I kept having dreams, like most people do every night. The difference between this night and many others, is that I kept having dreams of Ashley. Not funky dreams where she makes a guest appearance or something but dreams like they were as real as me typing this entry. In the dreams we were still together and very happy like nothing ever happened between us. I mean I was TRULY happy in my dream and when I woke up and found myself in my bed in my parent's house I felt like seriously breaking down and crying. When I fell back asleep, the dreams did a complete 180. In the second round of dreams, I met Ashley in some broken down XXX shop or something where she was banging every guy that entered and when she saw me, it was like she never saw me in her life. She thought I was just some usual customer. I remember talking to her and asking her what was going on and she kept going, "Do I know you?" I mean, it was freakin' surreal. I don't know what my mind was doing but it was seriously screwing with me. What the fuck (excuse my language) is going on with me? I mean, seriously. I feel like I am going completely mental.