i want my god damn fudge covered oreos.
i'm feeling a bit sad today.
a bit un-Ariel.
nothing is wrong, exactly, i just... had a conversation with an old friend/lover, and it left me sad. not because we are no longer lovers. it's good that we aren't. it would be impossible anyway, given the distance between us. i'm just sad that we aren't such good friends anymore. we used to talk about everything, and get super excited about things, and just geek out constantly. now i'm lucky if we manage our hellos.
i feel like my ability to get super excited about things has diminished. whether it's due to my age, or my weight, or just life, i don't know. but it sucks. i loved the giddy feeling of being excited. it's just not there anymore. not about anything. the closet i came to touching it again was when i marathoned all of the mindy project in the space of a weekend. now that i'm back to watching it on an episode by episode basis, it's not as exciting. (or maybe it's because danny and mindy hooked up. whatever.)
i don't know. i don't think it's depression, because a) i'm medicated, and b) i'm generally rather happy overall. i just am missing my spark. my jest. i feel like i lost it after i left college, or hell, maybe after undergrad, and haven't managed to find it again. maybe i never well. maybe it was just youth.
blah de blah.
la la la la life goes on.
a bit un-Ariel.
nothing is wrong, exactly, i just... had a conversation with an old friend/lover, and it left me sad. not because we are no longer lovers. it's good that we aren't. it would be impossible anyway, given the distance between us. i'm just sad that we aren't such good friends anymore. we used to talk about everything, and get super excited about things, and just geek out constantly. now i'm lucky if we manage our hellos.
i feel like my ability to get super excited about things has diminished. whether it's due to my age, or my weight, or just life, i don't know. but it sucks. i loved the giddy feeling of being excited. it's just not there anymore. not about anything. the closet i came to touching it again was when i marathoned all of the mindy project in the space of a weekend. now that i'm back to watching it on an episode by episode basis, it's not as exciting. (or maybe it's because danny and mindy hooked up. whatever.)
i don't know. i don't think it's depression, because a) i'm medicated, and b) i'm generally rather happy overall. i just am missing my spark. my jest. i feel like i lost it after i left college, or hell, maybe after undergrad, and haven't managed to find it again. maybe i never well. maybe it was just youth.
blah de blah.
la la la la life goes on.