Title: One Night
Rating: PG-13 for violence
Word Count:~3150
Spoilers: none-Crossover request from [info]wandereringray involving the boys of SG-1 and the boys of Firefly and a night out on the town.
Characters: SG-1 and the crew of Serenity
Pairings: Implied Sam/Jack (if you look hard enough), implied Daniel/Kaylee, implied Teal'c/Jayne
Summary: SG-1 finds itself in a bar with the Serenity crew while they wait for repairs to finish setting on the ship so that they can get back to the gate. Drinking and other bar fun ensues, leading into a choice of hiding from the Alliance Feds in a convent or a brothel.
Also posted on A03It wasn’t exactly a typical night out. Not like any night out Daniel could remember in recent history anyway. They were ostensibly still on a mission, though at the moment he was pretty sure that their mission consisted of watching Teal’c and the big guy they called Jayne pound back the vile local swill in an effort to prove who was the bigger man.
Daniel mostly held back a snicker and took another drink of the nasty liquid someone on this planet dared to call a beer. He wasn’t much of a drinker, and no connoisseur of beer, but this was simply disgusting. He was fairly certain he was already drunk, but Jack had told him that he wasn’t drunk until the room was spinning, and so far the room had kept fairly still.
Teal’c held his seat across from Jayne with serious concentration. Ten empty glasses sat in front of him. Two more full ones waited his next move. Teal’c’s eyes remained trained on Jayne’s. He showed no signs of the drinking, his hands steady, his half-smile fairly permanently stamped on his face.
For his part the big guy Jayne was struggling. He was trying to finish his eleventh glass, though he looked like he might be sick. He was shaking, spilling nearly as much as he managed to get into his mouth, while Jack, Daniel, the uptight doctor Simon and the smirking captain Mal watched. The pilot was the only guy at the table who didn’t seem interested, but Daniel couldn’t fault him there. Wash sat in the lap of the only woman at the table, his wife and the captain’s second in command. They appeared to be intimately involved with an exploration of each other’s faces.
Daniel still wasn’t clear why she was there with the guys when Sam had been spirited away by cute little mechanic and the…what was that she called herself?...Companion. Yes. Daniel was fairly certain that was more a euphemism than a job title, but judging by Jack’s reaction to her, she was probably well suited for the job. Still, Daniel got the impression that neither Kaylee nor Inara wanted anything to do with a night out at the local pub.
Afternoon, he reminded himself. It was hard to tell in this dark hole of a bar, but outside the light was still shining. They had been there for a little more than an hour, since they had been forced to put down on this planet for some repairs. The captain insisted they would be back in the air by morning, though at the moment, Daniel wasn’t sure any of them would be in any condition to fly in the morning.
Kaylee had tried to explain to them what was wrong with the little ship, but not even Sam had followed it. Mal had told them not to worry about it, she knew what she was doing, and had sent her off to salvage for parts. She’d returned twenty minutes later, beaming a smile that put Sam’s best to shame, her arms filled with what appeared to be a bundle of scrap metal. It was easy to see she was proud of herself though and she disappeared into the ship.
It was hours later that she emerged, freshly scrubbed and looking more adorable than Daniel would have imagined. It was fairly obvious she had been attempting to steal the eye of the young doctor, and it was equally obvious the young man hadn’t a clue.
To be fair, he seemed thoroughly devoted to that odd sister of his, and all his attention was bent on keeping her safe. That didn’t make Daniel anymore comfortable when Kaylee chose him as her weapon to evoke jealousy in her object of affection. She sat near him and asked questions about him, what he did, all the while making eyes at him and making sure that Simon saw her.
Daniel heard the Chinese cussing and looked up. He had found it amusing how this culture had grown, the mix of Chinese and Western influences. The captain was cussing at Jayne who was regurgitating under the table. Wash and his wife were laughing and even Jack looked amused.
Teal’c raised an eyebrow. “I believe that makes me the victor.”
Jayne moaned and laid his head against the table.
“Hey, you gonna clean that up?” The bartender was suddenly at the table, his face red, his bushy mustache bristling as his mouth moved.
“Sorry about that sir.” Mal stood, his hands moving outward in a placating gesture. “My friend here can’t seem to hold his drink.”
“Can too-“ Jayne jerked upright, knocking the table and sending a shower of the dark liquid over Teal’c, Simon and Daniel. Jayne pitched forward, into Mal, sending Mal sprawling into the bartender.
The next few moments were like some slow motion comedy routine as Mal and the bartender rolled to the floor, Jack jumped clear, landing in Simon’s lap, Simon stood, sending Jack sliding to the floor, knocking over the table all together, which sent Zoe and Wash flipping over backwards and skittering across the floor.
Daniel wasn’t sure whether to laugh or dash under the nearest upright table to avoid the flying beer and insults in both Chinese and English and…what was that language, anyway?
Daniel felt a hand on his leg seconds before that hand pulled him down and a flying tin mug hit the wall behind him. Zoe’s laughing face beamed at him as he spared a glance back her way to say thanks. “Keep your head down, Doctor.”
Daniel nodded his thanks, and spared a glance up for Jack and Teal’c. Jack and the captain were back to back throwing out punches as half the bar came at them, though Daniel wasn’t entirely sure what had precipitated the fight. Teal’c was standing over Jayne, who apparently had collapsed on the floor shortly after he’d gotten to his feet, seemingly effortlessly holding off three men brandishing crude clubs.
For a moment, Daniel wondered if this wasn’t another one of those surreal missions where they all ended up in some twisted version of reality, hooked into some computer or controlled by some alien, until they figured out the trap. It would explain so much.
“Daniel!” he heard Jack shouting his name and scanning the crowd for him. Tentatively, he got to his feet and moved along the wall, out of the range of the flying fists and beer mugs. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Zoe enter the fray, her fist slamming into the face of someone who Mal had just sent flying her way. The man slumped to the floor and she smiled. Daniel thought that at the moment she was at least as frightening as she was beautiful.
He instinctively ducked a flying bottle meant for his head and dove over an upended table, ending up side by side with Simon. “Is it always like this?”
Simon looked at him quizzically. “Pretty much.”
“I can’t remember the last time we got involved in a bar fight.”
“Daniel?” Jack leaned over the table and grabbed Daniel’s jacket. “Your help would be nice.”
“Sorry Jack.” Daniel stood, then pushed Jack aside to swing at the man hurling a bottle toward Jack’s head. His fist connected with the man’s nose, and was rewarded with a shower of blood as the man fell backward clutching his face.
“This is not getting better.” Jack muttered, pushing himself upright. “Daniel, head for the door. Take the doctor with you. We’ll be right behind you.”
Daniel nodded and ducked back down behind the table. “Come on, Doctor, we’re going.”
Simon followed him, glancing back over his shoulder as they made their way to the front door. “What about the others?” he asked as he and Daniel made it past the worst of the fighting.
“Jack’s getting them. He told us to get out.” Simon nodded tightly and Daniel opened the door, squinting into the late afternoon sunlight. For a few moments he couldn’t see anything as his eyes adjusted, then he was wishing he hadn’t seen. A large ship was sinking slowly their way and by its markings, it was one of those that they had been busily evading since their arrival in this little corner of the universe. He cussed, shoved Simon back into the bar and pushed the door closed. “That’s not good.”
He surveyed the room. Three quarters of the bar lay on the floor or across tables, and the remaining few sat moaning and tending to wounds. Their group was scattered across the back of the bar. Jack and Zoe were going to have matching black eyes, if their common hand positions were any sign. Mal was bleeding from the nose and cheekbone. Jayne was semi-conscious on the floor. Wash was picking his way over bodies and debris. Daniel shook his head. Just as he was about to say something, the door flew open behind him and sent he and Simon sprawling to the floor.
Kalyee and Sam followed the door, pushing it shut as quickly as Daniel had. “Feds, Cap.” Kaylee yelled.
Mal cussed again, in a long string of Chinese that made Daniel smirk. “Damn Alliance Feds don’t give a man no peace. Zoe!”
“Right Cap. Wash, check the back door.” She knelt beside Jayne and slapped him hard. He groaned and reached out to hit her but she moved. “On your feet, Jayne.”
“Colonel, we got us a bit of a situation.”
“So I gathered. Major?” Jack turned to Sam who seemed very out of place beside Kaylee.
“Spotted them coming in just a few minutes ago, Sir. Inara went for the ship, we came here.” She looked around at the mess and bodies. “Sir, what happened here?”
Jack shook his head. “Just a misunderstanding, Major.” Mal said.
Wash bounced back into the room. “Back is clear. There’s an alley, leads down to the convent.”
“Convent?” Daniel asked, finally getting to his feet.
“Sisters of the Way, reason Shepard Book wanted to come here.” Zoe filled in, gathering the group’s weapons from the bar’s lock up. “Only convent in this region. We could-“
“No.” Mal interrupted. “No. We can’t.”
“Sir-“
“Zoe, we ain’t.”
“Excuse me, someone want to fill me in on what we’re talking about?” Jack demanded, finally getting up from his spot near the wall.
“I think they’re talking about hiding in the convent, Sir.” Sam offered.
“Not again.” Jayne declared, finally recovering his feet, though he seemed to weave a bit before steadying. “Not after last time.”
“I concur, much as it pains me to say.” Mal said. “Jayne, check out front. See what we’re up against.” He took his gun from Zoe and checked it for ammo.
The bar was starting to stir again, and Mal started shooing everyone toward the back door. Daniel helped Simon stand and followed toward the back of the bar. His head was spinning, and he could taste the alcohol in the back of his throat. He stumbled over the leg of an unconscious bar denizen, lost his balance and would have hit the floor, if not for the sudden presence of Kaylee beside him.
“Careful.” She said, slipping an arm around him to hold him up.
“I’m a little-“
“Drunk, I can tell.” She smiled and it made his face flush. “Must have been some party.”
“Not really.” Daniel leaned a little on her as he concentrated on making his feet move. They were in the alley now, and he could hear the sounds of an organized military force somewhere nearby. “Are we in trouble?”
She smiled again. “Not really. Cap’n knows what he’s doing.”
Daniel seriously doubted that. They were nearing the end of the alley. The convent walls formed one side, the other wall seemed to be an extension of the bar…or…
“If not the convent?” Zoe hitched her head toward the opposite wall and Mal got a wicked grin.
“Everyone pair up. I’ll arrange it with Mera.”
Daniel wasn’t sure what was happening, but Kaylee seemed to so he followed her lead, into a side door just out of the alley and into…a plush sitting area draped in women in various stages of undress. “Where are we?” he whispered to Kaylee.
“It’s a whorehouse.” Jayne replied in an overdone stage whisper. He was standing only because Teal’c was holding him upright. His hat was crooked, ridiculous even straight and Daniel started to chuckle.
“Kaylee, get him upstairs.” Mal said from somewhere ahead of them.
“Right Cap.” They were moving again, up some dark stairs that twisted several times before resolving into a long hallway dotted with doors. Kaylee found one open and they fell through it, landing on a soft bed filled with pillows. She was giggling as she pulled herself free of him and got up to close the door.
“I can’t-I-“ Daniel tried to get up from the bed, but couldn’t seem to sit up. He seemed to be drunker since he stopped drinking. Kaylee was giggling again.
“Silly, there ain’t no where to go just now. Sit still.” She pulled his jacket from him and tossed it onto the floor. “Might as well make the best of it, right?”
She moved on to his boots. Daniel felt the room moving. He laid back and covered his eyes. The dark was welcoming, calming. He felt hands moving up his leg, but couldn’t muster a protest. The buzz in his head was deafening and he was drowning in it.
The room was dark, somehow Daniel knew that before he even opened his eyes. His head felt as though it were three times bigger than normal, his mouth dry. He was slowly becoming aware of the rest of his body. The last thing he remembered was spotting the Alliance ship. Everything else was a blur.
He moved, and was surprised to feel another body beside his, an arm draped over his naked torso. Naked. His hand slid down beneath the blanket. Completely naked. He dared a glance over his shoulder. Red hair covered the pillow. He couldn’t see her face where it was nestled up against his back. Kaylee.
Daniel stiffened. He gently moved her arm and sat up, searching in the dark for his clothes. Behind him, Kaylee stretched and rolled over, affording him some privacy as he reached for a pile on the floor, hoping his pants might be there. It turned out to be her shirt instead. He dropped it and went for the next pile, coming up with his pants and a sock.
“Morning.” Kaylee mumbled as he tried to pull them on.
He looked over his shoulder sharply. She was smiling a sleepy smile. “Morning,” he responded. “What’s happening?”
“Don’t remember?” she asked, her smile widening. “I could take that as an insult.”
Daniel shook his head. “I was drunk.”
“I know. It was cute.”
“Cute?”
There was a knock on the door and Daniel froze. “Kaylee, we gotta move. Get dressed and downstairs.” Mal nodded through the crack in the door at Daniel who could only stare back.
“On it, Cap.” She threw off the blanket and jumped up, pushing her hair off her face and grabbing the shirt Daniel had left on the bed.
Daniel tried to concentrate on finding his own clothes and not look at her. She seemed to dress in record time and he was still tying his boots. She kept smiling at him and it made him nervous. “Come on.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him through the door and down the stairs. As they entered the common room, Jayne moved away from Teal’c, refusing to look at anyone, and holding his gun in front of him. Teal’c raised an eyebrow at Daniel and smiled.
Jack looked annoyed as he gestured Daniel closer, though Sam looked quite pleased with herself. Before anyone else could say anything, Mal came back in through the side door. “Okay, here’s the plan. Inara’s got her shuttle just east of us. The sun ain’t up yet, but its coming. We go quiet and keep to the dark. We get back to Serenity and fly before the sun…and we’ll get you back to your gate.”
Jack nodded his agreement with the plan. “Teal’c, you take point. I’ll take the rear.”
It was Mal’s turn to nod. “Jayne, you’re with the Colonel. I’ll go up front. The rest of you, keep quiet and stay with us.”
Jayne looked relieved to not be paired with Teal’c again, at least to Daniel. They set out through the sleeping streets of the town that reminded him of something out of the old west. It was an uneventful journey that ended in a short shuttle ride, a swift blast off and another long day and night through space.
The gate was on a planet near the edge of their civilization, a forgotten planet long since abandoned, except for the secret Alliance testing ground where Mal and his crew had been attempting a robbery. Daniel and the team had come through the gate and walked most of the day before they found the little ship and its crew, with the Alliance in hot pursuit. The rest of the mission had gotten worse from there.
Now, Mal was attempting to put the ship down near the gate without drawing any undue attention from the nearby Alliance troops. Jack and Sam were geared up and ready to go. Teal’c seemed to be as well, though Daniel wasn’t sure the smirk on his face was for. He pulled on his vest and reached for his helmet. Kaylee stepped closer, holding the helmet and putting it on his head, pausing to kiss him deeply. He froze for a moment, then kissed her back, indulging for the moment in the softness of her lips, the beauty of her-“
“Daniel.” Jack’s voice cut through the moment and Daniel ended it, looking up. They were on the ground, the ramp down. The gate waited. How did she do that? He looked back at Kaylee, she smiled at him and he smiled back.
“Right behind you Jack.”
He leaned in and whispered in Kaylee’s ear in Chinese, then followed Jack and Sam and Teal’c toward the Gate. The wormhole whooshed into existence and Daniel bounded to up the stairs. He paused long enough to look back at the ship where Kaylee stood waving beside Mal and the others. He noticed Simon had moved closer to the little mechanic and smiled. Maybe her plan had worked afterall. In another lifetime maybe he would have-“
“Are you coming, Daniel?” Jack asked at his elbow.
“What? Yeah. Coming.” Daniel smiled as he stepped through the gate. One week in their world, one week of running and dodging and hiding…one night would be with him for a long time…even if he couldn’t remember most of it.