(no subject)
well i have been thinking about this for a long time... and id really like to move to cali yea yea i kno its not everything its cracked up to be but id like to go n i know i can always move back but im also thinking about just going to see my cuzion too. i duno i want to go around n see things before i feel its too late but i wana stay here with ryan as well. n i feel i have this decision to make but then again i wish ry could just come along with me. i just think hes not gona like it or hes going to think its sumthing more n get disapointed. i want to go on a road trip out west ive never been out there n i want to see things for myself. ::sighs:: i dont want to go alone but i dont want sumone whos gona spoil it for me to come along too. i dont know where im going to live in july eatheir i dont want to live alone and i dont want to move far away, i dont want a roommate... but if i lived not too far away n i had a car i wouldnt mind cuz then i could drive. but my mom is moving n i duno where to. i feel awful like i am doing sumthing wrong. i duno so far a lot of ppl dont like the idea of me moving. but i hate the cold n i wouldnt move far far away till i was out of college. i duno... i cant make up my mind on what i want but i know i need a car n i wont have one by next january and i know im never going to be driving any time soon because my mom dosnt like the idea of it at all least thats the impression that i get. she wont get me a liceanse or permit. i told her im not doing it alone so she needs to help me then she agrees on sumthing n goes back on it when i get the guts. like she thinks im gona cave in n do it alone shes funny im already paying for my own car. i cant pay for insurance alone i asked to be on hers she said no. so if i drive im drving without insurance. i cant stand it. then when i brought the topic up with ryan he told em that we would get a truck together and i wouldnt need to worry about it. i duno i think it made me worry more lol.well im done complaining... though i still want to move out west.