(no subject)
I am starting to feel that guys honestly see me as just an object. As much as I love sex... I hate feeling like I'm being used. Honestly... I've been used so much and of course I have this feeling that the guys that I should be with I will never find here in Santa Barbara. Instead of being pessimistic and thinking that all guys are jerks I'm just going to believe that the guy out there for me is back home. I know for a fact that I'm not a horrible person and I know that I'm not hideous... I just have to wait. A friend down here told me that not all guys are horrible that the ones that weren't were just not that attractive and very shy around girls.... but then again he is the same one that told me last week that he would make love to me 4 times a night (haha... oh drunk men). I just wanted to rant... I hate feeling used and somehow it always ends up happening to me. I need to work on being more of a man and not caring. Oh well....