I seem to have inadvertently written a Beckett pastiche
I hear that some people use the internet for useful purposes - research, communication, porn. Not me. Here's what I do.
Eliza JS:
Let's talk. My name's Eliza JS. Tell me about yourself.
Me: I want to know what love is.
Eliza JS: What happens after you get to know what love is?
Me: Nothing.
Eliza JS: Are you saying no just to be negative?
Me: No.
Eliza JS: You are being a bit negative.
Me: No I'm not.
Eliza JS: Do you believe it's OK to be not?
Me: To be not what?
Eliza JS: What is it that you really want to know?
Me: I told you, I want to know what love is.
Eliza JS: Imagine you've already gotten to know what love is... What then?
Me: Well, then I'd know.
Eliza JS: Can you elaborate on that?
Me: I can.
Eliza JS: Would you expand on that a little?
Me: After I've found out, I'll know. Seems fairly straightforward.
Eliza JS: Would you expand on that a little?
Me: No!
Eliza JS: Are you saying no just to be negative?
Me: No.
Eliza JS: Are you sure?
Me: Yes.
Eliza JS: I understand. Go on...
Me: Well, what is it?
Eliza JS: What else comes to mind when you ask that?
Me: Nothing in particular.
Eliza JS: Are you saying no just to be negative?
Me: No.
Eliza JS: Are you saying no just to be negative?
Me: No.
Eliza JS: Are you saying no just to be negative?
Me: No!
Eliza JS: You are being a bit negative.
Me: No I'm not.
Eliza JS: Are you here because you're not?
Me: But I am!
Eliza JS: Are you here because you're?
Me: Because I'm what?
Eliza JS: Do you enjoy being what?
Me: What?
Eliza JS: Are such questions on your mind often?
Me: No.
Eliza JS: Why do you say 'no'?
Me: Because they aren't.
Eliza JS: Does that reason explain anything else?
Me: I don't know.
Eliza JS: Why don't you know?
Me: How should I know?
Eliza JS: What else comes to mind when you ask that?
Me: Nothing.
Eliza JS: Why not?
Me: Why should it?
Eliza JS: What answer would please you the most?