HAPPY NATIONAL COMING OUT WEEK
happy national coming out week, everyone.
this is overdue, but here is my personal 'coming to terms with my sexuality' story.
Okay, here’s the bottom line: I’m a girl who likes girls. Loves girls, in fact. I love everything about being a girl (yes, even my period) and I love everything female. From bodies to personalities, I love girls.
And I always have. I was eight years-old when I first told my father at the dinner table, ‘daddy, a woman’s body is so much prettier than a man’s body.’ Up until puberty I rated the sexiness of the models in my mother’s magazines and pattern books. Most kids have a few make-out buddies in early elementary school; I had several from kindergarten to fourth grade. I thought all little girls felt the way I felt.
Then puberty and a subscription to ‘teen magazine’ hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that I was expected to be boy-crazy. I was expected to have fantasies about boys. And soon I would be expected to fool around with boys…
So I did what I always do. I went to the public library and began to research the topic. I gathered a pile of back issues of ‘cosmo’ and started to read about blow jobs. I knew I would never enjoy it, but I thought I might as well teach myself how to get it over with. Luckily I never had the opportunity to see if my research paid off because by the end of eighth grade I had given up and dismissed myself as asexual.
A couple of years later I discovered erotic fiction, the water jets in the jacuzzi, and my lust for ladies. I wasn’t surprised, frightened, worried, or angry when I realized that the word for girls like me is Lesbian. I was simply happy. I was happy that I was one [giant] step closer to realizing who I am.
When I was sixteen I met quite possibly the most amazing girl on the planet and fell in love. Life is good.
What about my friends and family? Most of my friends have known about my sexuality just as long as I have. I am lucky because I know that my friends love and accept me no matter what.
But there is one bump in my otherwise smooth life.
My parents freaked out. We all said horrible things to each other that will never be forgotten. I know they love me, but despite the thousands of dollars they have spent on family therapy, our relationship is broken beyond repair. Fighting for acceptance from my mother, stepfather, and father was the most painful experience of my life and has proved fruitless. (pardon the pun.) so we have walked away from each other.
I have never been nicer, more confident, or happier with myself and with the world. Essentially, I have never been more Camille.
so go post your own story and let me know when you do.
this is overdue, but here is my personal 'coming to terms with my sexuality' story.
Okay, here’s the bottom line: I’m a girl who likes girls. Loves girls, in fact. I love everything about being a girl (yes, even my period) and I love everything female. From bodies to personalities, I love girls.
And I always have. I was eight years-old when I first told my father at the dinner table, ‘daddy, a woman’s body is so much prettier than a man’s body.’ Up until puberty I rated the sexiness of the models in my mother’s magazines and pattern books. Most kids have a few make-out buddies in early elementary school; I had several from kindergarten to fourth grade. I thought all little girls felt the way I felt.
Then puberty and a subscription to ‘teen magazine’ hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that I was expected to be boy-crazy. I was expected to have fantasies about boys. And soon I would be expected to fool around with boys…
So I did what I always do. I went to the public library and began to research the topic. I gathered a pile of back issues of ‘cosmo’ and started to read about blow jobs. I knew I would never enjoy it, but I thought I might as well teach myself how to get it over with. Luckily I never had the opportunity to see if my research paid off because by the end of eighth grade I had given up and dismissed myself as asexual.
A couple of years later I discovered erotic fiction, the water jets in the jacuzzi, and my lust for ladies. I wasn’t surprised, frightened, worried, or angry when I realized that the word for girls like me is Lesbian. I was simply happy. I was happy that I was one [giant] step closer to realizing who I am.
When I was sixteen I met quite possibly the most amazing girl on the planet and fell in love. Life is good.
What about my friends and family? Most of my friends have known about my sexuality just as long as I have. I am lucky because I know that my friends love and accept me no matter what.
But there is one bump in my otherwise smooth life.
My parents freaked out. We all said horrible things to each other that will never be forgotten. I know they love me, but despite the thousands of dollars they have spent on family therapy, our relationship is broken beyond repair. Fighting for acceptance from my mother, stepfather, and father was the most painful experience of my life and has proved fruitless. (pardon the pun.) so we have walked away from each other.
I have never been nicer, more confident, or happier with myself and with the world. Essentially, I have never been more Camille.
so go post your own story and let me know when you do.