Mensa Invitational: Puns
The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take
any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing
one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are the 2005 winners
1. Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period.
2. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.
3. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
4. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright
ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign
of breaking down in the near future.
5. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting
laid.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person
who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is, like, sending off all these
really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's, like,
a serious bummer.
11. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.
12. Caterpallor (n): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the
fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
13. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing
one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are the 2005 winners
1. Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period.
2. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.
3. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
4. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright
ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign
of breaking down in the near future.
5. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting
laid.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person
who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is, like, sending off all these
really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's, like,
a serious bummer.
11. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.
12. Caterpallor (n): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the
fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
13. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.