ES21 Fanfic: Burning Paper Dragons (Habashira/Agon, R) 7/??
Title: Burning Paper Dragons
Author: persepolis130
Beta: none (Please let me know if you see any issues!)
Pairing(s): Habashira/Agon, various minor pairings (m/m and m/f)
Word Count: novel (WIP)
Rating: R
Summary: As a new member of the yakuza Syndicate, Habashira Rui has been assigned the nightmarish job of assistant to Kongo Agon.
CHAPTER 1 / CHAPTER 2 / CHAPTER 3 / CHAPTER 4 / CHAPTER 5 / CHAPTER 6
Notes: The Showa period was during the reign of the emperor Hirohito, from 1926-1989. I'm not sure how I feel about the "porno" portion of this chapter. If you have any suggestions, please let me know, and I can spruce it up a little!
CHAPTER 7
I gave up trying to think about the car. I didn't know why he'd given it to me and I never would, and that was that. I had the paperwork to save or damn me, and what was a man supposed to do when some bastard up and gave him a Lexus? With black leather trim and walnut accents and power rear-door sunshades and the purr of a wild beast from its 4.6-liter V8 engine...
But I wasn't thinking about it. It was what it was. And what it was was half the price of my house hanging over my head. Damn that Agon. Suits were suits, and silk ties looked nice, and I still wanted those Italian leather shoes, but a car?
I wasn't thinking about it. I'd given up on thinking. Too much thinking turned a man's brain to soup. I was going to bed.
Megu was there waiting for me. Her bleach-blonde hair fell in her eyes, and her breasts looked just as nice as the first time I saw them. Her take-no-prisoners attitude paired with that soft, warm skin was exactly what a man needed. She was the kind of woman you didn't regret knocking up in a locker room after your first big college win.
She curled an arm around my neck as I lay down beside her. "Rui," she said. "I feel like doing it."
It was the kind of frankness I respected in a woman.
I kissed her.
She pressed against me, breasts tight to my chest. Her thigh slid over my hip, and her hands ran across my shoulder blades. "Mmm," she hummed into my mouth.
I squeezed her ass and pulled her on top of me.
"If you're not in the mood, you could've said," she told me.
For a minute, I didn't know what she was talking about. I blinked in confusion. What kind of mood did she expect me to be in? Then I realized I was limp as boiled squid.
Kah, that fucking car! Agon was making a fool of me again! And this time in front of my wife!
"It's not like you've done much to put me in the mood lately," I told her, since the best defense was a good offense. I'd be damned if I was telling her the truth. "All I ever hear from you anymore is baby this and baby that. No man gets turned on by that crap."
"Would you like to rephrase that?" she threatened.
"No, I wouldn't!" I said, rolling her off me. I wasn't taking any more shit today.
"If you'd give me a baby, I'd stop bothering you about it," she told me.
"I gave you one already! And not that long ago, you told me you should've gotten rid of it!" I shot back.
"Why don't you say that a little louder so your son can hear you?" she asked, lying down beside me in a huff.
"I'm not the one who said it!" I protested. "I take care of my family! I work my hardest to provide everything I can, which you always say isn't enough--"
"Bullshit!" she announced.
"--and I don't feel like taking on extra responsibility when you have no fucking appreciation for what I go through!"
She didn't answer me. It made me feel like breaking things. Mostly Agon's face. I'd kick his skull in and mash his brains into the ground with the soles of my worn-out shoes. Now he'd turned my wife against me. This was bullshit.
"I'm going to sleep," I told Megu. I settled in and yanked the blanket up to my chin. But I didn't feel like sleeping. Not next to her, anyway. I was sick of being disrespected. Didn't anyone know how to treat a man nowadays? The whole of Japan was going straight down the shitter.
"Rui?" Megu said. "Do you ever think of how it used to be? How we used to be? Back when we were young and stupid and angry about all the wrong things?"
I looked at her. This didn't sound like my wife. She was staring at the ceiling. She looked pretty. "I've always been angry about the right things," I told her. "I haven't changed at all. Neither have you. People don't change."
"Everything changes. Time is like running water, and if you try to cup it in your hands, it'll slip right between your fingers," she said.
I snorted. If I didn't know better, I'd say she was drunk. "Go to sleep, Megu."
She kept looking at the ceiling. I didn't know what her problem was. People never changed, and nothing was different except Agon ruining my life. Kah, that bastard pissed me off!
Megu swallowed. "I know about the affair, Rui," she said.
I blinked. "Who's having an affair?"
"Don't screw with me. I've known for a while," she told me, "but I wanted to give you a chance to end it on your own."
"End what on my own? I'm not having an affair!" I insisted. Then a sick thought struck me: "Are you?"
"No woman wants to find out her husband is cheating on her, whether she gives a shit about him or not," she informed me. "Having to confront you about it pisses me off. Don't make this harder than it needs to be."
I rolled my eyes. "You're delusional. I'd like to know when you think I'm having this affair, and what money I'm using to pay for it!"
"You seem to have plenty of money lately for sake and cigarettes--"
"Don't get on my case about something like that! You've smoked since you were twelve!" I protested. "You almost gave birth in the car because we had to find a vending machine to buy one last pack before you got to the hospital!"
Megu ignored this and continued, "You have a whole new wardrobe, you start coming home smelling like a strip club at three in the morning --"
"Kah, your imagination is running away with you!" I insisted. "It's all because of work-- my new assignment! I told you!"
"We haven't had sex in months, Rui. Months! We used to do it almost every night," she accused, finally looking at me. Her eyes were full of fire. "I'm not stupid! A woman knows what that means."
"It hasn't been months!" I protested. "It's only been--" But wait. Had it been months? That couldn't be right. But I couldn't remember the last time we did it.
"I want you to stop seeing her," Megu told me.
Kah! I would never dream of touching another woman! And believe me, I'd had chances! A man like me always has chances! How long had we been together, and this was the sort of trust she had in me? I'd never lost faith in her! Never! Everything I did was to make her happy! I paid for the clothes on her back, the food in her belly, the roof over her head-- and I worked my ass off doing it. I even swallowed for her!
"I don't think I will," I told her, just to be contradictory. If she was unhappy, it was her own fault. I wasn't the one who wanted to start all over at zero with another kid. I'd made myself a life I was proud of. If she hadn't, that wasn't my problem.
"You're really an asshole today," she told me.
"And you're a vindictive bitch," I said. "Now shut up. I'm tired. And I'm not having an affair."
"I'm going to smother you in your sleep for talking to me that way," she said.
"Good luck paying the bills on your own," I told her. "You'll have to sell your body to afford that shitty private school your son's going to."
"Who'd buy? You're not even interested," she said. "And don't try to bullshit me with this 'baby' excuse. You know how to pull out before you finish."
I didn't have anything to say to that.
Well, I actually had a lot to say, but there was no way I could say any of it. Fucking Agon and his fucking mind games. I fucking hated that bastard.
What I wouldn't give to be in his bed instead of mine, my knees resting on silk sheets, my tongue wrapped around his, and my dick shoved up his ass. Kah! I fucking hated him so much!
*****
Agon sat in his chair with a can of coffee instead of the usual sake. He was probably trying to shake off a hangover from last night. I knew he'd been with some girl in a hotel room. He was always with some girl. I bet he didn't remember her name.
"What's your problem?" he asked.
I was scowling harder than usual. I was also dead on my feet, and unlike him, I hadn't enjoyed myself last night. And it was all his fault. "If you think I'm going to fall all over myself thanking you, you're wrong. You put my name on it, it's mine, and I don't owe you anything!"
He threw me an annoyed look. "What the hell are you yammering about? You're spouting nonsense again. Didn't I tell you not to talk?"
"The car!" I shouted, vein throbbing in my forehead. "You already know I'm talking about the car!"
He rolled his eyes and sloshed the coffee around in his can. "You're loud. Didn't you bring me more cigarettes?"
I was seriously going to kill him. Murder him. In cold blood. With my bare hands. Squeeze his neck so hard that his eyes popped out of his--
"Look," he said, because I guess he could tell. "If you don't like the car, give it back. If you do like it, well, you know what to do." He shifted in the chair, sliding one knee to the side and tilting his hips toward me. The outline of his dick showed through his pants. They were navy blue, and I wanted a pair.
"I'm really sick of your bullshit," I told him.
"It's not going to suck itself," Agon reminded.
"What's the catch?" I demanded. "I've been sucking you off for months. If I quit, you ruin me. My life goes down the tubes. So why the presents? The clothes, the car--"
"The catch is my cock down your throat. Now hurry up," he told me, and snapped his fingers. He brought his coffee to his lips and, just to prove he was better than me, took a nice long drink.
"If there's no catch, then let's fuck," I told him.
"Fuu, someone's excited!" Agon grinned. He crumpled his empty can and tossed it at my head.
"Don't screw with me!" I snapped, not ducking in time. My forehead stung where it hit. "I'm not your practice squad-- I'm a starter. You can't keep me standing on the sideline acting like you're not going to play me. We both know how it'll end up!"
He laughed, but I couldn't tell if it was fake. I didn't see anything funny. "Not now," he said. "Tonight. At my place."
"That's too long to wait!" I protested. "Do you have any idea how pissed off I'll be by then?!"
"Yeah," he told me with a grin. "I do."
*****
"Mom says you got a girlfriend," Ryo told me.
I choked on my coffee. It was the kind Agon drank, loaded with caffeine, and it burned my throat. I liked it.
"Is she hot?" Ryo asked. He held a protein drink in his hand and looked more awake than anyone should before the sun came up. I wasn't sure if it annoyed me or not.
"I don't have a girlfriend," I told him. "Your mother's losing her mind."
"And you bought a new car," Ryo added. "Sport Special Edition wheels, huh? It's nice."
"I didn't buy it," I said. "It was a gift."
"Can I have the old one?" he asked.
"Dream big," I told him.
He laughed. I couldn't remember the last time I'd heard him do that. His eyes were bright and clear. Where was the slacker with the lazy expression and cigarette hanging from his lips? Was this really my son?
"Did I tell you I rode my bike to school the other day?" he asked.
I rolled my eyes. This was more like it. "Why did you go and do something stupid like that?"
"Alarm didn't go off. Or I slept through it, maybe, I dunno. I was up late studying," he said. An odd grin touched his lips. "It freaked people out. Not a single kid in the whole damn school's got a bike. You believe that? It's like a different world or something. I love it there."
"I'm glad. I think you're out of your mind, but I'm glad," I told him. Were we actually having a civil conversation? I had to take advantage of this: "How's it going at the gym? How's Unsui treating you?"
He shrugged. "Good, I guess. He knows a lot, and he's not an asshole. He calls me 'Ryo-kun.' I told him he could. Did you know they got machines to measure oxygen intake? Mine sucks. It was cool of you to get me in there, Dad."
"I told you before," I reminded him, "front row at the Christmas Bowl. You'd better not let me down."
"Dad, I--" A sound like an alarm clock came from his pocket. He capped his drink. "I gotta go, or I'll miss my train. See you tonight if you're home, maybe. Okay?"
"If I'm home," I agreed, not sure I wasn't hearing wrong. My son wanted to see me?
"Oh, and Dad?" he said from the hallway. "Unsui-san's brother... you work with him, right? Kongo Agon?"
I bristled. "Maybe I do. So what?"
Ryo frowned, tugging at the shoulder strap of his sports bag. "I just want to, uh... Be careful of him, okay? I mean, I know you can't help who you work with, but... just watch out. Alright? I mean, don't get too close to him. He's trouble. I mean, I hear he is."
"Don't miss your train," I told him.
*****
On a TV as big as Agon's, the actress's tits were the size of watermelons. Her skin was golden tan, her hair long and blonde, and her Japanese marginal at best. "Japanese man so big," she moaned. "I never know he love me so good... oooh...!"
"Can't you turn that off?" I demanded.
Agon took a drag off his cigarette and tipped his head to blow the smoke into the air. His shirt was unbuttoned, his skin dark and smooth behind the curtains of white fabric. He lounged across a black leather sofa that was bigger than my living room, looking like a New York playboy. I perched on the arm rest.
"Don't you get enough porno bullshit in real life? Doesn't every woman you meet beg to get naked with you?" I asked, though I already knew the answer. "Why the hell are we watching this?"
"Ah, Rui-kun's throwing a temper tantrum," Agon announced to thin air. "Guess he needs a spanking."
"Kah!" I fumed.
He smiled.
I glared at the television. The woman was pressing her breasts together, rolling her head back like it was the best thing she'd ever felt. I wished she'd stop. It looked stupid. No real woman did crap like that.
When I looked back at Agon, he was still smiling at me. I wanted to gouge his eyes out. "Megu and I had a fight, alright? Stop looking so superior. I can't enjoy porn when I'm angry with my wife. That's all!"
"Is that what it is?" he asked, waving the cigarette in dismissal.
"Also this stupid festival. I'm in with city government now! It's a bigger headache than I thought it would be, dealing with people I'm supposed to not insult," I griped.
"Is that why you and sweet wifey are fighting?" Agon asked. "Must be tough on her."
I didn't know what he was implying, but I didn't like it. "She wants to have another kid," I told him.
Agon frowned. "What's wrong with the one she's got?"
"I asked her that!" I insisted, though I was glad someone understood where I was coming from.
"Ask her harder," he told me.
I sighed, wishing I'd bought more cigarettes. Agon wouldn't let me touch his, and I was out. He was such an asshole. You'd think he bought his own! "She's not the kind of woman who takes no for an answer."
"Ah, who wants a wife like that?" he asked.
"Shut up!"
Agon laughed. "And you really love her?"
"I already told you I love my wife. You laughed at me. Is there something wrong with your memory?" I asked him, annoyed.
He was quiet for a moment, looking at the television. "So is she your wife because you love her, or do you love her because she's your wife?"
"Don't talk garbage," I told him, not sure what he meant. "I love my wife because I love my wife, end of story. You've never been with one woman long enough to bother arguing with her, so you wouldn't understand. Your relationships are disposable."
"Everything is disposable," he told me. "It's the way of the world. If you're not getting along with your wife, lose her and get a new one. A better one. She's getting old anyway, isn't she?"
"You're an asshole," I told him. He laughed, which only proved me right.
"Rui-rui-kun," he said.
"That's still not my name!" I announced. "And could you turn off this damn porno already?!"
"Why don't you divorce her?" he asked, not turning it off. He flicked the ash from his cigarette. "You need a wife that's obedient and trusts your judgment as a man. None of this shit about second-guessing and contradicting you. The man is the decision maker, not the woman. Women are only good for looking pretty and spreading their legs."
"Shut up," I repeated, though with less venom than before. He was disgusting, but parts of what he said rang true. When a woman questioned you, it made you feel like less of a man. People should know their place.
"I've got the perfect idea," Agon announced.
"You're full of shit," I informed him.
"Say that again, and I break your face," he told me. "You're ruining the mood."
"What mood?" I demanded.
Agon tossed his cigarette into the ash tray, slapped on his fake-sweet smile, and slid off his sunglasses. "I'll be your wife!"
It was too ridiculous to piss me off, so I shrugged. "Fine. If you're my wife, light me a cigarette." He did. It made me suspicious, him doing something I wanted. But at least I had a smoke.
"Come, husband, wouldn't you like to sit on the sofa? You've had such a long day, and you work so hard!" he said in his fake-sweet voice, standing and ushering me into his place. "There now, isn't that better?"
"I'm not into role-playing," I told him, settling in against the cushions. "Also, wives don't call their husbands 'husband' anymore. What is this, the Showa period?"
"I'm sorry to bother you, husband," he said, fake-concern on his face. He knelt down beside me and put a hand on my knee. "I know I'm such a burden!"
"This is stupid," I told him, wishing he'd stop screwing around. I wasn't amused. I was never amused.
Agon had fake-tears in his eyes. His acting was too good. His everything was too good. "All I want to do is make you happy, husband," he sniffed. "I know I'm not a proper wife. Please forgive me! I have these... thoughts. Naughty, naughty thoughts!"
I rolled my eyes. He grabbed my hand, and when I tried to yank it away, he wouldn't let me. "You're embarrassing yourself," I told him.
"Please, husband!" he pled, eyes full of tears. "I need you so badly! Some days, all I can do is dream of riding your thick cock!"
I gaped. The woman in the porno moaned, and her tits bounced up and down on the screen behind Agon. They were firm and pert and perfectly rounded with silicone, and I couldn't even pretend they were the reason I was hard.
"I love it when you do me hard with my thighs pressed to my chest... or from behind so you can reach around and grab my tits," Agon purred, working at my belt buckle. "And when you slide your tongue into my--"
"Agon!" I snapped. "Shut the fuck up!"
"Aah, you're ruining it!" he said, jerking my shirt out of my pants. "Just play along, trash!"
I fumed. "Don't tell me to play along and then call me trash!"
Agon gave me an evil look and grabbed my crotch. "Oooh, husband! Is that for me?"
I wanted to kill him. I wanted to slice him open and watch his intestines gush out onto the floor. I wanted to laugh at him as the life seeped from his body and then kick him in the face just because I could. I wanted to prove once and for all that nobody could screw with Habashira Rui.
But I couldn't, so I fucked him instead.
Afterwards, things got awkward.
I was lying between his thighs like I had so many times before, warm and sated, but the silence between us wasn't a comfortable one. My arm was between Agon and a sofa cushion, and I was starting to lose feeling in my hand. Agon didn't poke at me or push me off him like he usually did. He didn't do anything at all.
It wasn't my fault. He'd refused to drop the bullshit about being my porno housewife, and how was it my fault I'd joined in? He was babbling about anatomy he didn't have and how good it felt when I touched it, and I only said a few things. I was just playing along. I just said, wife, wife, and three more words-- just three! And he said them first. He took it too far, and how could I help doing what I did when I was this close and his ass was that tight?
It wasn't my fault!
Agon cleared his throat. "What happened just now is not to be repeated. Ever."
"Yeah, yeah," I sighed, just wanting it over with. "I know the story. It never happened."
"I didn't say that," he told me. He moved beneath me, and I expected to get dumped on the floor, but he just pulled my arm around his neck. His skin was moist with sweat, sticking to the leather of the sofa. My fingertips tingled. "Don't tell me I'm saying shit I'm not saying."
I twisted a dreadlock around my finger, tugging at it. "So what are you saying?"
A noise of annoyance came from Agon's throat, and he shifted again but still didn't push me off. "I meant, don't repeat it to other people. Or I swear on all that's holy, I really will kill you. And turn off this damn porno. It's pissing me off. You knocked the remote onto the floor."
I frowned, fishing for the remote. I'd forgotten about the video, my brain turning it into white noise, but I was still glad for the quiet. "So what, then? It did happen?"
"Stop being stupid," he scolded.
I wasn't sure if it was stupid or not, but I couldn't help asking, "Do we do it again?"
"What are you, fucking nuts?" he demanded, smacking the side of my head. "Of course we do it again! That felt incredible!"
"Kah, don't hit me!" I yelled, relieved.
"I do what I want," he said. "Now go home. I'm sick of you."
"I'm taking a nap," I retorted. "If you want me out, you're going to have to kick me out."
"I hope you die in your sleep," he snapped, because he'd never bother doing something that took that much effort, and we both knew it.
"I hope you die first!" I insisted.
He laughed and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. His skin was warm and soft. "I love you, husband," he fake-sweet whispered, just to piss me off.
I closed my eyes. I wasn't stupid enough to say it again. I was never saying it again, ever. But that doesn't mean I didn't think it.
NEXT CHAPTER
Author: persepolis130
Beta: none (Please let me know if you see any issues!)
Pairing(s): Habashira/Agon, various minor pairings (m/m and m/f)
Word Count: novel (WIP)
Rating: R
Summary: As a new member of the yakuza Syndicate, Habashira Rui has been assigned the nightmarish job of assistant to Kongo Agon.
CHAPTER 1 / CHAPTER 2 / CHAPTER 3 / CHAPTER 4 / CHAPTER 5 / CHAPTER 6
Notes: The Showa period was during the reign of the emperor Hirohito, from 1926-1989. I'm not sure how I feel about the "porno" portion of this chapter. If you have any suggestions, please let me know, and I can spruce it up a little!
CHAPTER 7
I gave up trying to think about the car. I didn't know why he'd given it to me and I never would, and that was that. I had the paperwork to save or damn me, and what was a man supposed to do when some bastard up and gave him a Lexus? With black leather trim and walnut accents and power rear-door sunshades and the purr of a wild beast from its 4.6-liter V8 engine...
But I wasn't thinking about it. It was what it was. And what it was was half the price of my house hanging over my head. Damn that Agon. Suits were suits, and silk ties looked nice, and I still wanted those Italian leather shoes, but a car?
I wasn't thinking about it. I'd given up on thinking. Too much thinking turned a man's brain to soup. I was going to bed.
Megu was there waiting for me. Her bleach-blonde hair fell in her eyes, and her breasts looked just as nice as the first time I saw them. Her take-no-prisoners attitude paired with that soft, warm skin was exactly what a man needed. She was the kind of woman you didn't regret knocking up in a locker room after your first big college win.
She curled an arm around my neck as I lay down beside her. "Rui," she said. "I feel like doing it."
It was the kind of frankness I respected in a woman.
I kissed her.
She pressed against me, breasts tight to my chest. Her thigh slid over my hip, and her hands ran across my shoulder blades. "Mmm," she hummed into my mouth.
I squeezed her ass and pulled her on top of me.
"If you're not in the mood, you could've said," she told me.
For a minute, I didn't know what she was talking about. I blinked in confusion. What kind of mood did she expect me to be in? Then I realized I was limp as boiled squid.
Kah, that fucking car! Agon was making a fool of me again! And this time in front of my wife!
"It's not like you've done much to put me in the mood lately," I told her, since the best defense was a good offense. I'd be damned if I was telling her the truth. "All I ever hear from you anymore is baby this and baby that. No man gets turned on by that crap."
"Would you like to rephrase that?" she threatened.
"No, I wouldn't!" I said, rolling her off me. I wasn't taking any more shit today.
"If you'd give me a baby, I'd stop bothering you about it," she told me.
"I gave you one already! And not that long ago, you told me you should've gotten rid of it!" I shot back.
"Why don't you say that a little louder so your son can hear you?" she asked, lying down beside me in a huff.
"I'm not the one who said it!" I protested. "I take care of my family! I work my hardest to provide everything I can, which you always say isn't enough--"
"Bullshit!" she announced.
"--and I don't feel like taking on extra responsibility when you have no fucking appreciation for what I go through!"
She didn't answer me. It made me feel like breaking things. Mostly Agon's face. I'd kick his skull in and mash his brains into the ground with the soles of my worn-out shoes. Now he'd turned my wife against me. This was bullshit.
"I'm going to sleep," I told Megu. I settled in and yanked the blanket up to my chin. But I didn't feel like sleeping. Not next to her, anyway. I was sick of being disrespected. Didn't anyone know how to treat a man nowadays? The whole of Japan was going straight down the shitter.
"Rui?" Megu said. "Do you ever think of how it used to be? How we used to be? Back when we were young and stupid and angry about all the wrong things?"
I looked at her. This didn't sound like my wife. She was staring at the ceiling. She looked pretty. "I've always been angry about the right things," I told her. "I haven't changed at all. Neither have you. People don't change."
"Everything changes. Time is like running water, and if you try to cup it in your hands, it'll slip right between your fingers," she said.
I snorted. If I didn't know better, I'd say she was drunk. "Go to sleep, Megu."
She kept looking at the ceiling. I didn't know what her problem was. People never changed, and nothing was different except Agon ruining my life. Kah, that bastard pissed me off!
Megu swallowed. "I know about the affair, Rui," she said.
I blinked. "Who's having an affair?"
"Don't screw with me. I've known for a while," she told me, "but I wanted to give you a chance to end it on your own."
"End what on my own? I'm not having an affair!" I insisted. Then a sick thought struck me: "Are you?"
"No woman wants to find out her husband is cheating on her, whether she gives a shit about him or not," she informed me. "Having to confront you about it pisses me off. Don't make this harder than it needs to be."
I rolled my eyes. "You're delusional. I'd like to know when you think I'm having this affair, and what money I'm using to pay for it!"
"You seem to have plenty of money lately for sake and cigarettes--"
"Don't get on my case about something like that! You've smoked since you were twelve!" I protested. "You almost gave birth in the car because we had to find a vending machine to buy one last pack before you got to the hospital!"
Megu ignored this and continued, "You have a whole new wardrobe, you start coming home smelling like a strip club at three in the morning --"
"Kah, your imagination is running away with you!" I insisted. "It's all because of work-- my new assignment! I told you!"
"We haven't had sex in months, Rui. Months! We used to do it almost every night," she accused, finally looking at me. Her eyes were full of fire. "I'm not stupid! A woman knows what that means."
"It hasn't been months!" I protested. "It's only been--" But wait. Had it been months? That couldn't be right. But I couldn't remember the last time we did it.
"I want you to stop seeing her," Megu told me.
Kah! I would never dream of touching another woman! And believe me, I'd had chances! A man like me always has chances! How long had we been together, and this was the sort of trust she had in me? I'd never lost faith in her! Never! Everything I did was to make her happy! I paid for the clothes on her back, the food in her belly, the roof over her head-- and I worked my ass off doing it. I even swallowed for her!
"I don't think I will," I told her, just to be contradictory. If she was unhappy, it was her own fault. I wasn't the one who wanted to start all over at zero with another kid. I'd made myself a life I was proud of. If she hadn't, that wasn't my problem.
"You're really an asshole today," she told me.
"And you're a vindictive bitch," I said. "Now shut up. I'm tired. And I'm not having an affair."
"I'm going to smother you in your sleep for talking to me that way," she said.
"Good luck paying the bills on your own," I told her. "You'll have to sell your body to afford that shitty private school your son's going to."
"Who'd buy? You're not even interested," she said. "And don't try to bullshit me with this 'baby' excuse. You know how to pull out before you finish."
I didn't have anything to say to that.
Well, I actually had a lot to say, but there was no way I could say any of it. Fucking Agon and his fucking mind games. I fucking hated that bastard.
What I wouldn't give to be in his bed instead of mine, my knees resting on silk sheets, my tongue wrapped around his, and my dick shoved up his ass. Kah! I fucking hated him so much!
*****
Agon sat in his chair with a can of coffee instead of the usual sake. He was probably trying to shake off a hangover from last night. I knew he'd been with some girl in a hotel room. He was always with some girl. I bet he didn't remember her name.
"What's your problem?" he asked.
I was scowling harder than usual. I was also dead on my feet, and unlike him, I hadn't enjoyed myself last night. And it was all his fault. "If you think I'm going to fall all over myself thanking you, you're wrong. You put my name on it, it's mine, and I don't owe you anything!"
He threw me an annoyed look. "What the hell are you yammering about? You're spouting nonsense again. Didn't I tell you not to talk?"
"The car!" I shouted, vein throbbing in my forehead. "You already know I'm talking about the car!"
He rolled his eyes and sloshed the coffee around in his can. "You're loud. Didn't you bring me more cigarettes?"
I was seriously going to kill him. Murder him. In cold blood. With my bare hands. Squeeze his neck so hard that his eyes popped out of his--
"Look," he said, because I guess he could tell. "If you don't like the car, give it back. If you do like it, well, you know what to do." He shifted in the chair, sliding one knee to the side and tilting his hips toward me. The outline of his dick showed through his pants. They were navy blue, and I wanted a pair.
"I'm really sick of your bullshit," I told him.
"It's not going to suck itself," Agon reminded.
"What's the catch?" I demanded. "I've been sucking you off for months. If I quit, you ruin me. My life goes down the tubes. So why the presents? The clothes, the car--"
"The catch is my cock down your throat. Now hurry up," he told me, and snapped his fingers. He brought his coffee to his lips and, just to prove he was better than me, took a nice long drink.
"If there's no catch, then let's fuck," I told him.
"Fuu, someone's excited!" Agon grinned. He crumpled his empty can and tossed it at my head.
"Don't screw with me!" I snapped, not ducking in time. My forehead stung where it hit. "I'm not your practice squad-- I'm a starter. You can't keep me standing on the sideline acting like you're not going to play me. We both know how it'll end up!"
He laughed, but I couldn't tell if it was fake. I didn't see anything funny. "Not now," he said. "Tonight. At my place."
"That's too long to wait!" I protested. "Do you have any idea how pissed off I'll be by then?!"
"Yeah," he told me with a grin. "I do."
*****
"Mom says you got a girlfriend," Ryo told me.
I choked on my coffee. It was the kind Agon drank, loaded with caffeine, and it burned my throat. I liked it.
"Is she hot?" Ryo asked. He held a protein drink in his hand and looked more awake than anyone should before the sun came up. I wasn't sure if it annoyed me or not.
"I don't have a girlfriend," I told him. "Your mother's losing her mind."
"And you bought a new car," Ryo added. "Sport Special Edition wheels, huh? It's nice."
"I didn't buy it," I said. "It was a gift."
"Can I have the old one?" he asked.
"Dream big," I told him.
He laughed. I couldn't remember the last time I'd heard him do that. His eyes were bright and clear. Where was the slacker with the lazy expression and cigarette hanging from his lips? Was this really my son?
"Did I tell you I rode my bike to school the other day?" he asked.
I rolled my eyes. This was more like it. "Why did you go and do something stupid like that?"
"Alarm didn't go off. Or I slept through it, maybe, I dunno. I was up late studying," he said. An odd grin touched his lips. "It freaked people out. Not a single kid in the whole damn school's got a bike. You believe that? It's like a different world or something. I love it there."
"I'm glad. I think you're out of your mind, but I'm glad," I told him. Were we actually having a civil conversation? I had to take advantage of this: "How's it going at the gym? How's Unsui treating you?"
He shrugged. "Good, I guess. He knows a lot, and he's not an asshole. He calls me 'Ryo-kun.' I told him he could. Did you know they got machines to measure oxygen intake? Mine sucks. It was cool of you to get me in there, Dad."
"I told you before," I reminded him, "front row at the Christmas Bowl. You'd better not let me down."
"Dad, I--" A sound like an alarm clock came from his pocket. He capped his drink. "I gotta go, or I'll miss my train. See you tonight if you're home, maybe. Okay?"
"If I'm home," I agreed, not sure I wasn't hearing wrong. My son wanted to see me?
"Oh, and Dad?" he said from the hallway. "Unsui-san's brother... you work with him, right? Kongo Agon?"
I bristled. "Maybe I do. So what?"
Ryo frowned, tugging at the shoulder strap of his sports bag. "I just want to, uh... Be careful of him, okay? I mean, I know you can't help who you work with, but... just watch out. Alright? I mean, don't get too close to him. He's trouble. I mean, I hear he is."
"Don't miss your train," I told him.
*****
On a TV as big as Agon's, the actress's tits were the size of watermelons. Her skin was golden tan, her hair long and blonde, and her Japanese marginal at best. "Japanese man so big," she moaned. "I never know he love me so good... oooh...!"
"Can't you turn that off?" I demanded.
Agon took a drag off his cigarette and tipped his head to blow the smoke into the air. His shirt was unbuttoned, his skin dark and smooth behind the curtains of white fabric. He lounged across a black leather sofa that was bigger than my living room, looking like a New York playboy. I perched on the arm rest.
"Don't you get enough porno bullshit in real life? Doesn't every woman you meet beg to get naked with you?" I asked, though I already knew the answer. "Why the hell are we watching this?"
"Ah, Rui-kun's throwing a temper tantrum," Agon announced to thin air. "Guess he needs a spanking."
"Kah!" I fumed.
He smiled.
I glared at the television. The woman was pressing her breasts together, rolling her head back like it was the best thing she'd ever felt. I wished she'd stop. It looked stupid. No real woman did crap like that.
When I looked back at Agon, he was still smiling at me. I wanted to gouge his eyes out. "Megu and I had a fight, alright? Stop looking so superior. I can't enjoy porn when I'm angry with my wife. That's all!"
"Is that what it is?" he asked, waving the cigarette in dismissal.
"Also this stupid festival. I'm in with city government now! It's a bigger headache than I thought it would be, dealing with people I'm supposed to not insult," I griped.
"Is that why you and sweet wifey are fighting?" Agon asked. "Must be tough on her."
I didn't know what he was implying, but I didn't like it. "She wants to have another kid," I told him.
Agon frowned. "What's wrong with the one she's got?"
"I asked her that!" I insisted, though I was glad someone understood where I was coming from.
"Ask her harder," he told me.
I sighed, wishing I'd bought more cigarettes. Agon wouldn't let me touch his, and I was out. He was such an asshole. You'd think he bought his own! "She's not the kind of woman who takes no for an answer."
"Ah, who wants a wife like that?" he asked.
"Shut up!"
Agon laughed. "And you really love her?"
"I already told you I love my wife. You laughed at me. Is there something wrong with your memory?" I asked him, annoyed.
He was quiet for a moment, looking at the television. "So is she your wife because you love her, or do you love her because she's your wife?"
"Don't talk garbage," I told him, not sure what he meant. "I love my wife because I love my wife, end of story. You've never been with one woman long enough to bother arguing with her, so you wouldn't understand. Your relationships are disposable."
"Everything is disposable," he told me. "It's the way of the world. If you're not getting along with your wife, lose her and get a new one. A better one. She's getting old anyway, isn't she?"
"You're an asshole," I told him. He laughed, which only proved me right.
"Rui-rui-kun," he said.
"That's still not my name!" I announced. "And could you turn off this damn porno already?!"
"Why don't you divorce her?" he asked, not turning it off. He flicked the ash from his cigarette. "You need a wife that's obedient and trusts your judgment as a man. None of this shit about second-guessing and contradicting you. The man is the decision maker, not the woman. Women are only good for looking pretty and spreading their legs."
"Shut up," I repeated, though with less venom than before. He was disgusting, but parts of what he said rang true. When a woman questioned you, it made you feel like less of a man. People should know their place.
"I've got the perfect idea," Agon announced.
"You're full of shit," I informed him.
"Say that again, and I break your face," he told me. "You're ruining the mood."
"What mood?" I demanded.
Agon tossed his cigarette into the ash tray, slapped on his fake-sweet smile, and slid off his sunglasses. "I'll be your wife!"
It was too ridiculous to piss me off, so I shrugged. "Fine. If you're my wife, light me a cigarette." He did. It made me suspicious, him doing something I wanted. But at least I had a smoke.
"Come, husband, wouldn't you like to sit on the sofa? You've had such a long day, and you work so hard!" he said in his fake-sweet voice, standing and ushering me into his place. "There now, isn't that better?"
"I'm not into role-playing," I told him, settling in against the cushions. "Also, wives don't call their husbands 'husband' anymore. What is this, the Showa period?"
"I'm sorry to bother you, husband," he said, fake-concern on his face. He knelt down beside me and put a hand on my knee. "I know I'm such a burden!"
"This is stupid," I told him, wishing he'd stop screwing around. I wasn't amused. I was never amused.
Agon had fake-tears in his eyes. His acting was too good. His everything was too good. "All I want to do is make you happy, husband," he sniffed. "I know I'm not a proper wife. Please forgive me! I have these... thoughts. Naughty, naughty thoughts!"
I rolled my eyes. He grabbed my hand, and when I tried to yank it away, he wouldn't let me. "You're embarrassing yourself," I told him.
"Please, husband!" he pled, eyes full of tears. "I need you so badly! Some days, all I can do is dream of riding your thick cock!"
I gaped. The woman in the porno moaned, and her tits bounced up and down on the screen behind Agon. They were firm and pert and perfectly rounded with silicone, and I couldn't even pretend they were the reason I was hard.
"I love it when you do me hard with my thighs pressed to my chest... or from behind so you can reach around and grab my tits," Agon purred, working at my belt buckle. "And when you slide your tongue into my--"
"Agon!" I snapped. "Shut the fuck up!"
"Aah, you're ruining it!" he said, jerking my shirt out of my pants. "Just play along, trash!"
I fumed. "Don't tell me to play along and then call me trash!"
Agon gave me an evil look and grabbed my crotch. "Oooh, husband! Is that for me?"
I wanted to kill him. I wanted to slice him open and watch his intestines gush out onto the floor. I wanted to laugh at him as the life seeped from his body and then kick him in the face just because I could. I wanted to prove once and for all that nobody could screw with Habashira Rui.
But I couldn't, so I fucked him instead.
Afterwards, things got awkward.
I was lying between his thighs like I had so many times before, warm and sated, but the silence between us wasn't a comfortable one. My arm was between Agon and a sofa cushion, and I was starting to lose feeling in my hand. Agon didn't poke at me or push me off him like he usually did. He didn't do anything at all.
It wasn't my fault. He'd refused to drop the bullshit about being my porno housewife, and how was it my fault I'd joined in? He was babbling about anatomy he didn't have and how good it felt when I touched it, and I only said a few things. I was just playing along. I just said, wife, wife, and three more words-- just three! And he said them first. He took it too far, and how could I help doing what I did when I was this close and his ass was that tight?
It wasn't my fault!
Agon cleared his throat. "What happened just now is not to be repeated. Ever."
"Yeah, yeah," I sighed, just wanting it over with. "I know the story. It never happened."
"I didn't say that," he told me. He moved beneath me, and I expected to get dumped on the floor, but he just pulled my arm around his neck. His skin was moist with sweat, sticking to the leather of the sofa. My fingertips tingled. "Don't tell me I'm saying shit I'm not saying."
I twisted a dreadlock around my finger, tugging at it. "So what are you saying?"
A noise of annoyance came from Agon's throat, and he shifted again but still didn't push me off. "I meant, don't repeat it to other people. Or I swear on all that's holy, I really will kill you. And turn off this damn porno. It's pissing me off. You knocked the remote onto the floor."
I frowned, fishing for the remote. I'd forgotten about the video, my brain turning it into white noise, but I was still glad for the quiet. "So what, then? It did happen?"
"Stop being stupid," he scolded.
I wasn't sure if it was stupid or not, but I couldn't help asking, "Do we do it again?"
"What are you, fucking nuts?" he demanded, smacking the side of my head. "Of course we do it again! That felt incredible!"
"Kah, don't hit me!" I yelled, relieved.
"I do what I want," he said. "Now go home. I'm sick of you."
"I'm taking a nap," I retorted. "If you want me out, you're going to have to kick me out."
"I hope you die in your sleep," he snapped, because he'd never bother doing something that took that much effort, and we both knew it.
"I hope you die first!" I insisted.
He laughed and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. His skin was warm and soft. "I love you, husband," he fake-sweet whispered, just to piss me off.
I closed my eyes. I wasn't stupid enough to say it again. I was never saying it again, ever. But that doesn't mean I didn't think it.
NEXT CHAPTER