Now, where was I?
It's been almost a decade since I posted a journal entry to this blog. I'm doing so now because I've reduced the amount of my personal life I post to social media, and I'd like a way of keeping track of the events of my life that aren't broadcast so intensely at random acquaintances. I'll probably let a few folks close to me know I'm doing this, so they can follow along if interested, but this will be mostly for me.
I read some of my earlier entries this morning, back when I fell in and out of love with Enda, and there were so many aspects of that experience I forgot. What else have I forgotten about the 10 years between now and my last post? What has been lost to the sands of time? Too much to account for.
I'm going to try and be better about keeping a journal moving forward. I did it some during the first year of the pandemic, when I was frightened so much of the time (much of that fear about the election). I would like to do it again now, because even though there is plenty to be afraid of, I've been doing a better job of pushing past that fear and finding joy.
June and the first part of July were non-stop travel for me-girls' weekend, Amelie's wedding, Summerisle, Abby's wedding, San Francisco, a week at the lake house. I got home and found I was a bit blue without the noise and bustle of travel. I embraced the feeling-being sad is a part of the human condition-and a few nights ago, I had a dream that made me wake up in a better mood. In the dream, Jennifer Coolidge was on an obscenely ornate and floral four-poster canopy bed, holding fluffy white dogs under either arm, bouncing in the bed, going "Yaaay" in her throaty, breathy voice. Who wouldn't get a happiness boost from seeing that?
Something about that dream made me realize I need to write more things down. I don't know why it was the Jennifer Coolidge dream that did it, because I've dreamt so many weirder/funnier/scarier things since then. Maybe I should do a post that's *just* things I've dreamed, because there were some whoppers. But for now, I'll just give a quick run-down of where I'm at.
After years of talking about it, I finally moved from Raleigh to Pittsburgh in October of 2021. I bought a house and furnished it. Paloma moved in with me and is now keeping my company. I am dating Ryan in NC and Jamie locally. It's funny to look back at the Ryan posts from so long ago - it's wild to think how long he's been a part of my life, through so many changes. He's visiting here next week, and I can't wait to see him.
Between the pandemic, politics, the economy, and climate change, the world has never felt less stable, but my little corner of it is pretty happy. There are some things I would like to work on to be a happier, healthier person. I've got an EMDR therapy session scheduled in a few weeks, so I'm looking forward to that.
There's so much more to get into, but I'll leave it at that for now. I'm going to try to make an entry at least once a week. Here's hoping I stick to it.