(no subject)
I've come to realize that if I eat a lot late at night, I won't be able to sleep very well. I should do something productive with this time though, seeing as I usually wake up at 11-12 nowadays. Productive right now would be going to the gym, or going into the garage and turning on my dryer for the third time. There's nothing worse than taking out cold clothes out of a dryer, but I keep forgetting about the damn thing. Or, I could decide on when to go to my toronto home. I could go tomorrow, or I could go on the 24th, or I could just go on Christmas Day.
I wasn't suppose to have the 24th off, but I guess my boss thought he'd be doing me a huge favour by giving me that day off. I'm very happy about it, but because I had planed to only go home on the 25th for such a long time now, I feel like a change of that plan might cause me to regret something. But then again, if I don't go home on the 24th, will I not regret wasting a perfectly great day that I could now spend at home? I guess I just don't like changing plans, it makes me feel anxious sometimes. Time to myself has become such a scarcity nowadays and I find myself scrambling for any little minute that I can take away for myself - to just do nothing. I remember the days when that's all I did - nothing. Thinking back, I realize how valuable those times are to me. Now, even when I do nothing, it hardly ever feels like it once did. There is hardly ever that complete peace of mind, complete relaxation. I used to be able to sit around for a whole day and not worry about a single thing. What happened to those days? Does life become more and more complicated and stressful as we get older and experience more, or am I simply in a rut at the moment? Ah well.
On to more positive things. Or well, perhaps this is a negative too. Haha. The other day, Wednesday to be exact, I had a day off. So what do I do when I have a day off? I shop. But on this particular Wednesday I rekindled my interest in books... well, reading in general. My order of back issues of Adbusters came in, which I was very excited about until I opened it up and the covers were different from the Canadian editions. And anyone who knows me well, knows that I like my magazine covers. Sometimes, I buy a magazine just because I like the cover. The stories can be complete shit, but if the cover is nice, it's worth a shot. If the cover is great, there's no question about it, I will buy. Then, I went to Chapters to buy a book I had in mind. I buy it and all is good. Then I decide to go to Costco in Kitchiner, and then because I was bored, I ended up going into the Chapters there too. Well, I also ended up coming out with 4 books. They had this buy 3 get the 4th free deal that I just couldn't resist! Needless to say, I now have books I'm dying to read, which is great, but I spent way too much money I don't have. Ah, but to read and actually really be into the book is a great feeling. The last time I had that was when I read Shapiro's Mao's War against Nature, which I had to write an essay on, so it kind of took some fun out of the reading that way, but the book was great. That book made me realize that I might be in the wrong major. I've always been interested in Asia, but only lately have I really understood the extent of my interest. My interest can be translated into love. But then again, I have a profound love for Europe as well. I suppose I should have done an International Relations major instead of European Studies. There's a whole world outside of Europe that I don't know too much about. And I hate not knowing. I wish I could just absorb knowledge. I absolutely love knowledge. The feeling I get when I learn something knew is so exhilarating, almost addicting. Addicting, like David Grays music. I think I might have developed a slight addiction to David Gray. At times, I have these urges to listen to David Gray and if I can't, I feel like I'm going to go crazy. There is something about him, his voice, his music that makes me feel whole. I just can't grasp what it is.
Heh.
Perhaps I should try another hour and a half of sleep, before I have to wake up and go meet some girl at the mall so I can buy two textbooks off of her. Art History 2290. Yes, a second year class. It's exciting. And it's going to be a hell of a class, me thinks. History of Photographic Media? Come on now, that's super exciting! It's definitely something to look forward to... I'm just not looking forward to forking over $45 dollars in a few hours.
I wasn't suppose to have the 24th off, but I guess my boss thought he'd be doing me a huge favour by giving me that day off. I'm very happy about it, but because I had planed to only go home on the 25th for such a long time now, I feel like a change of that plan might cause me to regret something. But then again, if I don't go home on the 24th, will I not regret wasting a perfectly great day that I could now spend at home? I guess I just don't like changing plans, it makes me feel anxious sometimes. Time to myself has become such a scarcity nowadays and I find myself scrambling for any little minute that I can take away for myself - to just do nothing. I remember the days when that's all I did - nothing. Thinking back, I realize how valuable those times are to me. Now, even when I do nothing, it hardly ever feels like it once did. There is hardly ever that complete peace of mind, complete relaxation. I used to be able to sit around for a whole day and not worry about a single thing. What happened to those days? Does life become more and more complicated and stressful as we get older and experience more, or am I simply in a rut at the moment? Ah well.
On to more positive things. Or well, perhaps this is a negative too. Haha. The other day, Wednesday to be exact, I had a day off. So what do I do when I have a day off? I shop. But on this particular Wednesday I rekindled my interest in books... well, reading in general. My order of back issues of Adbusters came in, which I was very excited about until I opened it up and the covers were different from the Canadian editions. And anyone who knows me well, knows that I like my magazine covers. Sometimes, I buy a magazine just because I like the cover. The stories can be complete shit, but if the cover is nice, it's worth a shot. If the cover is great, there's no question about it, I will buy. Then, I went to Chapters to buy a book I had in mind. I buy it and all is good. Then I decide to go to Costco in Kitchiner, and then because I was bored, I ended up going into the Chapters there too. Well, I also ended up coming out with 4 books. They had this buy 3 get the 4th free deal that I just couldn't resist! Needless to say, I now have books I'm dying to read, which is great, but I spent way too much money I don't have. Ah, but to read and actually really be into the book is a great feeling. The last time I had that was when I read Shapiro's Mao's War against Nature, which I had to write an essay on, so it kind of took some fun out of the reading that way, but the book was great. That book made me realize that I might be in the wrong major. I've always been interested in Asia, but only lately have I really understood the extent of my interest. My interest can be translated into love. But then again, I have a profound love for Europe as well. I suppose I should have done an International Relations major instead of European Studies. There's a whole world outside of Europe that I don't know too much about. And I hate not knowing. I wish I could just absorb knowledge. I absolutely love knowledge. The feeling I get when I learn something knew is so exhilarating, almost addicting. Addicting, like David Grays music. I think I might have developed a slight addiction to David Gray. At times, I have these urges to listen to David Gray and if I can't, I feel like I'm going to go crazy. There is something about him, his voice, his music that makes me feel whole. I just can't grasp what it is.
Heh.
Perhaps I should try another hour and a half of sleep, before I have to wake up and go meet some girl at the mall so I can buy two textbooks off of her. Art History 2290. Yes, a second year class. It's exciting. And it's going to be a hell of a class, me thinks. History of Photographic Media? Come on now, that's super exciting! It's definitely something to look forward to... I'm just not looking forward to forking over $45 dollars in a few hours.